CUT
by pink-sparkle69
Summary: kagome cuts her self. never too deep,never enough to die,but enough to feel the pain. enought to feel the screams inside. she doesn't talk but can a sertain person change that......please read and review
1. hello hell

"HELLO, HELL"

Hey people don't own Inuyasha.

I hold my breath, and push down. The piece of metal sinks in neatly. A sudden liquid heat floods my body. The pain is so sharp, so sudden, I catch my breath. There is no rush, no relief just pain, a keen, pulsing pain. I drop the pie plate and grasp my wrist with my other hand. Dimly aware even as I'm doing it that this is some I've never done before.

Never try to stop the blood. Never interfered, it's never hurt like this before. And it's never, not worked. I fall to the ground and then, I remember the first time I did this. Then it all goes clear, and then I see it.

ME...

A warm, sunny day was schedule for today. So I decided to walk home. It was after school and I was in a hurry. I needed to see him my boyfriend. Than, I heard it.

"Kagome! Wait up I'm coming" said a boy with blue eyes, and short black hair...Yup what can I say that was my boyfriend (also known as the love of my life). So I stop. I don't remember well what happens next. But I saw Kouga running faster than ever. 'Get out of the way' I heard him scream. But for some reason I just stood there.

Then he got closer, and closer and closer until it happened he pushed me hard, across the road. Before I hit the ground I heard him scream 'I LOVE YOU'. Than I hit the ground, when I got up it hit me Kouga, my boyfriend gave his life for me, for that stupid girl...

Kagome…

He had pushed me away from a car that I didn't even saw. He had gotten hit by the car that I was supposed to be h it by... That's how it all started my life in...

HELL!!

In the car a boy,

In the boy a drunk,

In the drunk a murderer,

That has killed my love.

Every night I would dream of Kouga and the day he died. I saw it repeat over and over again, not able to sleep or eat because of HIM. Sometimes when everything was going fine no dreams or anything I would hear' I love you, I love you' and the memories would come back.

I stop talking, wouldn't say a word, I wouldn't smile, wouldn't cry, and wouldn't show any emotion at all. My parents thought it wouldn't last long but I sure prove them wrong. For it has been more than a years now since Kougas' death and I haven't said a word to any one.

I went to school that day, they put me in here. I was sick so I went to the nurses' office. "I need to take your pulse" said that bitch, so I didn't answer. She took my arm and lifted my shirt, 'oh my' she whispered when she saw them, when she saw my babies of pain ' wait here' she said as she try to find what to do ' I'll be right back' so I did what I was told and I waited ten minutes, than twenty, than twenty-five, I fell a sleep waiting. Dreaming of Kouga and the car that broke us,

Apart

In the car a jerk,

In the jerk a boy,

In the boy a murderer,

That has kill my love...


	2. Angel? or Ghost?

ANGEL? OR GHOST?

I wake up to a noise. I open my eyes slow and see my mother standing there with tears in her eyes. I sit up. She talked for a while and than she said ' I love you Kagome but you have to go for your own good' I look away, never talked to her or looked at her. When she was talking to me I looked above her head. We head home.

It's winter, so she drives in slow motion. She tries to stop at a red light but looses control, than I see it! Kouga on the street smiling, I close my eyes and fall asleep wishing to never wake up.

"Kagome, Kagome... wake up Kagome" it's my mom, I guess, I wasn't going to sleep forever that day.

I wake up and see a hospital.' MY NEW HOME' I shall say. I get out of the car to see an old lady, with brown eyes and gray hair, she seems nice. But than again so did the school nurse. I follow her into the hospital. She talk to me and waits for me to answer, I never do. She said her name was Kaeda, a nice name I think...

My whole time here I don't talk to anybody. All of the people here are anorexic, or drug abuse people, so why waste my time? I don't talk, I guess nothing change am except that I'm lonelier than ever, but don't really care I was given a book so I could "express my self" as they said so.

I write, and write and write. This book is my only friend here. I head to study hall, like all the other, and see a ghost. And no it's not Kouga. I stare at him for a while. He has white hair or silver I can't tell but it's nice. He was pale I should add, yeah. Really, pale.

I keep staring. He turns around and stares at me. I don't look away just stare. There a blue tag on his clothes yeah he works here by the looks of it. So mush for the ghost. I can't see his name from back here so I give him a name of my own 'angel' and yes I know I sound like a retard, but he looks like one, or at least I believe so. .

Days, months have passed and my angel has been here every day. He looks at me every day, but stays away. He's not like the others that's a good thing too because if he talk to me, I wouldn't talk back.

I was alone in the game room. All the anorexic girls went to sleep or puke I don't really know. True be told I couldn't even fall a sleep at least not today. NO! not today.

I sit here alone,

In this dark place.

My mind has gone crazy,

My heart's in a race.

I sit here alone,

With my thoughts gone mad.

I feel I'm insane,

My life's turned bad.

I sit here alone,

As people pass by.

I try to hide my self,

But can't and I cry.

I sit here alone,

I'm all messed up.

I have no control,

It's time to give up.

I sit here alone,

I can't hold on.

I'm losing my grasp,

My sanity gone.

I sit here alone,

My freedom is here,

The struggle is over,

I won't shed a tear.

I sit here alone,

I won't see light.

I have only darkness,

In my own world tonight

I get up from my chair and walk to the sink across the room. I look in the mirror and hear it 'I love you' it's was Kouga! Today was our anniversary, our two year anniversary if he was alive. I couldn't take it. I went back to my current spot at the table.

I saw a pen so I took it in my hands and turn the radio on. It has some cheesy love song. I look down at my hand and see the pen, I break it in half. I hold it in my hand with the sharp end to my wrist...than...than I cut ...and cut some more.

The pain feels so good I smile, than I try to make it deeper. But a hand stops me. I look up and see my angel, looking down at me, with no emotion in his eyes or face. He looks at me in the eyes and I began to cry. He lets go,

"Why do you do this?" He asks. I look at his shirt, and there it is his name tag 'Sesshoumaru' that's my angels name. He sees me not paying attention so he lifts my chin so I'm facing him. "Why do you do that?" I don't answer.

"Why won't you talk to me? Just tell me... do you want to die?"

I think about it do I want to die. YES! Yes I do. I hear his voice again.

"Please tell me why you do this" I can see his emotions now he's not mad. But I don't understand. He seemed worried. I began to cry. There is something about umm Sesshoumaru that I can't take. I close my eye than a tear slides down my cheek when I look up I can't believe it-it's Kouga.

I reach to touch his face. I now I'm happy. Than like a nightmare he disappears and Sesshoumaru is there... standing looking down at me... I look up and I know he can see my disappointment. I don't know what's going on! I feel light headed.

I look down at my arm, it's still bleeding. Sesshoumaru looks down at my arm and grabs my hand. He tries to pull me so he can take me to the office. I get up and I feel dizzy I fall forward crushing into Sesshoumaru the darkness takes over...


	3. FORGOTTEN

FORGOTTEN?

He scoops me up in his arms. I feel safe in his arms and my eyes feel heavy. Than I hear him.

"Everything is going to be all right" than everything goes black.

I wake up, to find myself face to face with a pair of golden eyes. I try to move my hands to sit up, but I can't my wrists are being held down by him...Sesshoumaru.

"You're awake" He says not taking his eyes of my wrist. He's cleaning them.

I try to get my wrist away from him, so I can get up but he pulls it back, and keeps cleaning it. When his done he looks up to me and speaks again.

"You woke up...I see. You were out for an hour or so" he stops to see if I have any questions or just want to talk. I don't so he continues.

"If you came here to get better ... why to you cut your self?" he stops, I don't speak. I look around we're not in the office we're in his room I believe.

It's different than mine. His room is all white nothing but whiteness. The only thing that gives color to his room is a picture... a picture of... Inuyasha? One of Kougas' friends. I pick the picture up. Sesshoumaru looks at me and speaks.

"That my younger brother" I don't say anything I just keep looking at the picture, He start again.

"See" he says as he point to another person in the picture, it's Kouga "that's Kouga one of Inu-" he stops when I look away, why does this happen to me?

I get up from his bed with the picture on my hands; I place it on his bed. Than I run out of his room across the hall into the bathroom. 'I love you...I love you' I hear it than it, and it all goes quiet.

"Hey! Are you OK in there" I hear Sesshoumaru. I don't say anything like always. I slide down the wall until I reach the cold bathroom floor. I start scratching my wrist, with my finger nail. Back and forth. Back and forth. Than the band aid comes off but I don't care and I continue. It bleeds again.

With finger nails

I Cut My Wrists

Why Can't I Feel

These Bleeding Slits

No Pain I Feel

So I Cut More

I take my finger

And Lock the Door

I Pull Down the Sleeves

It Covers the Scars

Of Frustrated Tears

Am I Too Far

I Cut until I Feel

Why Won't the Pain Last?

I'll Let My Wrists Bleed out

I feel my blood running down my arm, it's warm. I keep on scratching yeah it hurts, but I like pain since the day he left. Once I got slap across the face, I liked the feeling... don't know why? 'I love you...I love you'

I stop scratching when I feel a body next to me. I feel safe, like nothing can happen to me in this embrace? It was Sesshoumaru! But I didn't care I felt as if it was meant to be, so I just stay there. After a couple of minutes I fall a sleep, in my 'angels' arms'.

I wake up the next day, in my room. I get up from my bed and walk to my closet, it really warm in this place so I decide to take a shower before I go to get breakfast.

I get my towel and a pair of lime green short and a sweatshirt,' I can't wear t-shirts '. I get out of my room and walk across the hall. To: the bathroom. There are some girls there and when they see me they smile and stare at me with pity, yup pity because I'm the biggest one here. Yup! a size four is bad for this place. Since everyone is a size one or zero, what a shame.

I ignore them and walk into the showers. I get my sweatshirt of and see a band-aid on my wrists; it went all across my arm. I stare at them for a while. I had forgotten about it till know.

Sesshoumaru

I than take the rest of my clothes off and get in the shower. I stay there for a couple of minutes. After a while I get out and get dress. I stand in front of the mirror and see the image of Kouga but it gets blurry and it disappears and Sesshoumaru appears... 'What's going on? '


	4. Better?

BETTER?

Its spring now, more than two months since I last cut my self. I have changed so much ever since Sesshoumaru stopped me. I do not know why but ever since I stop cutting, I don't dream of Kouga. I still don't talk to anyone. I feel like I've been forgotten, but still the people here are kind of nice.

I walk trough the hallways, trying to find the game room. Its group therapy day so I have to go "talk" about my problems, which I don't. But I still have to go so I don't make others feel bad. I walk into the room and grab a chair. I place it next to the window in a corner. I wait for the rest of the girls to get here.

I look out the window and see Sesshoumaru getting in a silver car; I look at him until he drives away into the woods. I hear noises so I look at the door, than down. All of the girls are walking in here, and behind them it's Kanna, the therapist. I think she's nice. She has blond hair and brown eyes, she is really nice, but likes to pick on people.

"OK!! Girls we're going to talk about something important that happened to all of you, OK? Ok who wants to go first?" I keep my eyes on my shoes because I don't want her to pick on me today.

"Well, any volunteers?" she asked and like always Kikyou had to go and raise her hand.

Kikyou, What can I say about her? Well... She was a cheerleader until she developed her eating problem. Yup! She pukes everything up. Really gross! When I first got here people just to say that I could be her twin if it wasn't for the fact that I was FAT!! Compare to so she raise her hand.

"Yes Kikyou what are you proud of today?" Kanna asks, Kikyou flashes every one a big fake smile. She stands up

"Kanna, I haven't puked in more than two days" she said. What a fake! she pukes every night I've seen her when she doesn't know am there.

"I have to try my best so that I can be level two and I can change persons, I would really like Sesshoumaru as my partner" she made a sad puppy face and sat down everyone clapped.

Yup! That's right if you're 'good' and the people here 'trust you', you're allowed to pick a new partner. And everyone here like Sesshoumaru, because he's not a old person like the rest, he's probably twenty. Not sure but anyway that kind of hurt me what Kikyou said about Sesshoumaru but I still keep quiet.

Therapy is over...

I walk into the bathroom to find none other than, Kagura, she's nice to me, I think she's the worst anorexic girl in here. I turn the water on so I can brush my teeth. I can see Kagura trough the mirror as she takes her hat off, she than start brushing her hair. She starts arranging some thin, black strand of hair over her bald spot. Some thing about her makes me feel bad...

She start talking to me, she says "good morning"

I ignore her, and turn the water up, so I can hear her, I hope that she goes away but she doesn't she keeps staring at me

"We better hurry up" I ignore her again I think that she's getting the picture because she starts to walk away. I stay there alone with my thoughts...

I walk into the cafeteria and take my usual spot on the table away from the rest of the girls. I eat my food in silence, as I hear the other talk, they talk about Sesshoumaru. They say he's hot, and that they would do anything to spend some time with him. And I do mean 'anithing'. I place my head on the table and close my eyes and wait, cause all the girls are eating and I'm wait for them to finish. I fall a sleep.

All my dreams were suicide, without any depression. I see me cutting in my room, the time that Kouga left. I see my blood running through my arm and on my wooden floor. I am alone in all my dreams. Because Kouga left. In my dreams, I really want to hear him say 'I love you' I want to see his face but because I don't cut myself I don't see him any more.

I feel that some one is staring at me so I look up it's Sesshoumaru.

"Are you ok?" he asks I don't answer he stays there with me until lunch is over. I get up and start to walk away, but he calls after me so I stop and look back.

"Come with me we need to talk about something" I follow him into the game room, no one is there he sits at the table were we first met. And than he gets my book out and shows it to me...

I wonder how he could have gotten my book I think it was in my room, but anyway. I look at my notebook for a while.

"Kagome" he says, I like the way he says my name with such a voice. "You can't write about death and cutting your self in your book because they will think you're crazy and put you in the Hausen area"

The Hausen area is were they put the people that have no cure many have died there or that's what the girls say.

"Why do I have to go there" Sesshoumaru looks up surprise to hear my voice, why would I talk to him.

Why?


	5. REWIND!

REWIND!

"Why do I have to go there" Sesshoumaru looks up surprise to hear my voice, why would I talk to him.

Why?

"Umm you can talk?" he waits for me to answer. But I don't.

"You don't have to go there Kagome. But you have to show some improvement in your behavior. You must at least speak in therapy or to the other patients" he waits for me to speak but I can't. I guess that was it for today.

I look down at the table trying to hide from his eyes. But than he grabs my wrist and looks at it for a minute before lifting my sleeve, and there are my scars, that have been healing for the past two months.

"How have you been feeling Kagome?" 'Fine' I want to say it so bad! But my mouth won't even try to make words.

"Kagome I'm going to try to talk to Kaeda to see if they trust you enough to let you change partners, because I would like to help you out" I look up and see that he was smiling. The first time ever that I seen his smile. I couldn't hold it back so I smile at him.

The look on his face was priceless his eyes got so wide and his smile grew twice in size. I look away. Took my book and got up. I began to turn when he grabs my wrist again, and looks me straight in the eye.

"I'm going to help you Kagome, and you're going to smile and talk none stop... I promise" with that he let go of my wrist and I walked away.

Days go by before I hear from Sesshoumaru again. He's going to be my partner starting on Monday. I don't know if I'm exited, to tell you the truth I'm not sure this is such a good idea.

I wake up when my door opens, and I check my alarm clock. 3:00AM OK what the...

Before I know there is someone running at me. They grab my wrist and hold me down on the bed. It's too dark to know what's going on so I don't move an inch.

"What if she calls out for help?" someone asks, as I began to struggle. I don't recognize the voice but I know that it's a girl from therapy. Dam I should have paid more attention. And why can't I scream for help!!

"Ha. Ha. Ha are you kidding yourself she's a mute!" who are this people! I began to freak out and their hold on my wrist tightened. So I stop.

"Kagome, why did you think you could have Sesshoumaru? What makes you so special?" I know this voice. I began to struggle and I can feel the sleeves of my shirt going up.

"What the hell, gross! Her wrist are bumpy!" the girl holding my wrist lets go before another one takes a hold of them. And lift them.

"Kagome why didn't you tell us you were a cutter? Aren't we your friends?" I know who this is... is Kikyou.

"Well this makes things easier for us" before I know it, I feel by blood flowing through my scars. Why are they doing this? I don't even look at this people.

"If they can't trust you, Sesshoumaru won't be your partner" Kikyou said before they leave me in my bed bleeding. I take the blind fold off and get up. Crying, I open my door and walk into the bathroom.

Everything around the halls is quiet, and full of darkness. I know that I can get in serious trouble if they find me walking around the hospital after nine. Especially, if I'm bleeding.

I open the bathroom door slowly. Trying to let as little light out as I can possible. As soon as I can fit through the slit, I get in. I let the water run for a minute or so...

_"Why do you do this?"_

_"Why wont you talk to me? Just tell me... do you want to die?"_

_"If you came here to get better ... why do you cut your self?"_

_"What makes you so special?"_

_"You can't write about death and cutting your self in your book because they will think your crazy"_

_"I love you, I love you"_

I look down at the sink there blood dripping from my wrist. I wash my wrist and wrap them in toilet paper, before sneaking back to my room.

I wake up the next day at eight in the morning and head to where most of the people are at. And I see Sesshoumaru sitting in one of the chairs. Yes, today is Monday. New partner time!

I take my regular spot by the window and wait for Kanna to arrive. Kikyou walks in starts talking to Sesshoumaru. He doesn't seem interested, so I look away.

Kanna walks in and takes her seat.

"Good morning girls...and Sesshoumaru..." said Kanna as she smiles at Sesshoumaru earning her self a glare from him. Not very nice I should add.

"Miss Kanna would you go on please" said one of the nurses braking the ice-full glare of Sesshoumaru.

"OK girls... I know you all are super exited for me to tell you about the girls that made level two" she stopped to look at the smiles on the room.

"some of you will get new partners, while others will keep the same.. but don't get me wrong everyone here has made great improvement, its just that we believe that some need more help than others, and some just haven't been able to adopt to their previous partners." she said running out of breathe.

"We get it Miss Kanna but can you please tell us all ready, I'm sure everyone is hungry." the same nurse spoke board out of her mind.

"Well.. I'm not trying to wasted any ones' time so the ones that aren't going to be partner up may leave"

"OK let begin with Kagura, your new partner will be Yuka" and with that sentence I dose off. I don't really know how much time when by but by the time I look up Kikyou and I where the only patients there, next to Sesshoumaru and Kanna.

"Kagome, are you OK?" I look up to see Kanna next to me. I nod and she goes back to her seat.

"OK, I've come to see that you have grown rather attached to Sesshoumaru. So after having a talk with him I've decided that it would be a good idea to partner you up with him" she said smiling at me.

"Oh! Kanna I don't know how to say this, you have no idea how much this breaks my heart" I knew it Kikyou was up to something, something bad I should add.

"What is it Kikyou, are you feeling ill?" Kanna said as she moves to the other side of the room to get closer to Kikyou.

"I'm sorry Kagome. I really don't want you to hate me... but I care too much, and I want you to get better..." she said as fake tears ran down her face.

"You see Kanna, last night I woke up late to a sound that came from Kagomes' room, and saw Kagome getting out of her room, so I follow her" her tears spilled faster and thicker down her face...

"I followed her to the bathroom...where she started cutting her self" Sesshoumaru looked up at me, and back at Kikyou...

"Kagome if you don't mind would you and Sesshoumaru come with me" as we were about to get out off the room we heard Kikyou talk...

"Kanna, umm am I getting a partner? Because I was thinking about Sessho-" she said whipping her tears away...

"Oh but of course... Sesshoumaru.. Would you be kind enough..." Kikyou had the biggest smile in the world, she had gotten what she wanted..." and get Myoga, so he can start working with Kikyou"

On to the nurses' office we go!

Again?


	6. Won't Cry

Won't Cry

I don't own Inuyasha

* * *

"Kanna, umm am I getting a partner? because I was thinking about Sessho-" She said whipping her tears away...

"Oh but of course... Sesshoumaru.. would you be kind enough.." Kikyou had the biggest smile in the world, she had gotten what she wanted..." and get Myoga, so he can start working with Kikyou"

On to the nurses office we go!

"Sure" was Sesshoumarus' respond as we walked away from the room. I could feel his eyes on my back but refuse to look back. But then I finally turn to look at him I could see that I had disappointed him and for some unknown reason it ...hurts!

_You see the pain that lies in her eyes,  
But, alas, her eyes are dry,  
She won't cry.  
No, she won't cry._

It's a longer way than I thought before we finally reach the office where Kaeda is waiting for us. Don't really know how she found out we were coming, but I guess it doesn't matter.

"Good morning Kanna" she said with a smile before turning to look at me. "Kagome" she nods "please take a sit" she tells me looking at two black leather chairs.

" Kagome I have been informed that you have improved over the last couple of months" she gets up from the her chair before going over to the window.

"but it has come to my attention that you still refuse to speak to others, not to mention your writing" she points over to her desk where my notebooks lays wide open. "it..leaves some disturbing questions to be asked" I look down at the floor for what seems hours, she doesn't stop talking for one second, about the hospital, my family and the accident. Im about to cry before a knock comes to the door. whats going on?

"Come in!" Kanna moves away from the door to let none other than Sesshoumaru in. Looking rather disappointed. I look back down to the floor, and Kaeda begins again.

"Sesshoumaru I regret to tell you that your request to help Kagome Higurashi by being her partner has been rejected...she's going to be transfered to another part of the hospital where she can be taken better care off" I look up at her words how can she be doing this!

"As for your cutting Kagome, we are disappointed that you had to do that a day before you turned level two, we thought you were getting better but i guess it was the opposite" she said straight into my eyes 'no im not gonna cry.'

" I informed your parents about moving you to the Hausen area and they agree" now Im angry how can they agree about me being moved when they haven't been here in months. I get up and get ready to leave.

_You see the anger that burns from her gaze,  
The madness that sets her eyes ablaze,  
She won't cry.  
No, she won't cry._

"Pack your stuff, and meet us back here" I ignore her and keep on walking, I only stopped to look up to Sesshoumaru before opening the door and running to my room. I have disappointed and hurt the only person that cares about me in this dreadful place.. whats next?

I walk down the hallway, its rather empty because its lunch time, so Im all by my self. Before going to my room I decide to got to the bathroom. I push the door open to see one of Kikyous friends staring at me. Before looking away and speaking to Kikyou.

"it OK.. it's only the mu...Kagome" and just like that the puking noises began. I walk over to the sink to wash my face. I look in the mirror.. and there it is an outline of someone that is not me... kou-no im not going to think about it... I turn around and run out of the bathroom until I get to my room.

I grab my bags and start putting all my things in there all my shorts and sweatshirt I guess deep inside I knew I was going to go there. Ever since Sesshoumaru told me. But who knew it was going to be so fast. Oh well I guess it doesn't matter anymore. so here I am packing for my new Hausen room..yay!

I hear someone coming in my room so I look up. and before I know Kikyou and her friend are sitting on my bed.

"Aww... we just heard Kagome...it must be horrible to be transfered to the Hausen" Kikyou spoke looking down at me.." you do know thats where they keep the worst patients right? the crazy ones" she looks at me and than at her friend.

"Im sorry your going to be sent there" Kikyous friend spoke earning herself a big slap across her face..

"shut up!"

"so Kagome what did a slut like you do to make Sesshoumaru want to be your partner" she come up to me close up to my face, before running her hand down my face. " did you touch him...kiss him or did you just fuck him" she whisper in my ear too close for my comfort. I close my eyes not wanting to see her.

_You see the fear that closes her eyes,  
The frown she wears is but a disguise,  
She won't cry.  
No, she won't cry._

Just like that I too get slapped across my face "answer me !" she screams at my face before she gets ahold on my hair and pulls on it hard making me fall to the ground, than she lets go.

"kIKYOU! why dont you just shove it, Im not in the mood" she looks surprise to hear my voice before slaping me hard acoss my face.

"so the mute can speak?" Before I sit up she slaps me again. Im just to pain, and right now this is what I want. Before Im slap again I hear a voice coming from my door way.

"Kikyou what is the meaning of this" Kikyou looks up at the man at the door her hand raised in the air waiting to make contact with my face again. I open my eyes too find Sesshoumaru at my door way. and Kikyou almost having a heart attack. so much for for the pain. She glares at me as if to tell me not to say a thing.

" She won't tell me why she cut herself" she looks at me " why didn't you ask me for help!..Im only trying to help" she answer looking down at the floor before crying again. Those fake tears of her. "please forgive me Kagome.. I let my emotions get the best of me...I just care too much"

"Kikyou would you please leave us alone?"he asked and Kikyou gave me a hug before whispering 'slut' in my ear, and as if nothing had happened she's out of my room. I keep on packing my clothes as Sesshoumaru walks and sits on the floor a couple feet away from me.

" Why did you cut yourself Kagome" he asked not looking at me but at my bag. I don't feel like talking anymore. so I just keep on packing. "why wont you let Kikyou help you" I don't pay attention to him anymore his not here. Im alone back home with 'Kouga...'

"Kouga?.. what are you talking about Kagome?" I look up at him when I hear Kougas' name. I guess I though his name out loud. I zipped my backpack up and began to walk out of the room, leaving Sesshoumaru all by himself..I stop at the door before walking back to my closet..Sesshoumarus' eyes glued on my back.

When I finally feel what I was looking for I get on my tip-toes to get it, but its too far away. Finally after struggling a couple of seconds. It falls breaking into a million pieces...my picture frame. In a matter of seconds Sesshoumaru's next to me pulling my hands away from the broken glass.

"stay right here" he says as he walks over to the mess on the floor. He picks up the picture and looks at it for a second. before handing it out to Kagome.

_You see the love that lies within,  
But she shall never love again,  
She won't cry.  
No, she won't cry._

"you know Kouga?"Sesshoumaru asks handing her the picture.

"Knew.." and with that Im out of the room and head to the office. Where Kaeda had been waiting a long time. When I finally get close enough to her she speaks..

"You'll stay here until you get better, it not as bad as you think." with that she opens the door and walk me to what seems to be the game room where to my surprise both boys and girls are waiting for me.

"Good afternoon, this is Kagome" after I heard my name I refuse to listen anymore and just look around the room. It not as bad as I thought. The whole place smells like bleach. and the floor is clean. I feel a tap on my shoulder and look up at Kaeda.

"Are you listening?"she ask looking deep into my eyes,as if trying to tell if Im gonna lie or not... I nod and she tell the people to introduce them self...

there is a boy around my age he stands up and starts talking...

"Well, my name is Hojo, Im 15 years old and Im scared of germs" what the fuck is going on this is not like the other place...

"Im sango" a girl speaks " Im 16 and scared of the dark..." I look up at Kaeda with a questioning look before she speaks.

"They are trying to over come their fear, so they can leave a normal life" she says... oh! get it! im supposed to over come my fear of losing people...so I can live a normal life with out cutting?..

More people speak but I don't really care about it by know it just the typical thing, some are anorexic, some have weird fears, and some are just plain weird! I come back to the world when I hear him speak..

"Im Inuyasha Im 17 and Im scared of hurting people..." with that I look at the teen sitting away from the circle, In a courter. He seems familiar, but don't know why... Some how he scares me.

After a couple of minutes Im in my new room unpacking..with my door open...actually I don't even have a door! I unpack as people walk by my door. Only once do I look up only to see Inuyahsa? at my door. looking at me.

"Did he made it?" what is he talking about...who? he just walks away as if nothing had happened. Leaving me feeling alone, for the first time since I met Sesshoumaru...he's Sesshoumarus' younger brother thats why they look familiar because of the picture.

I go over to my bed and lay down waiting for sleep to take me away. I don't have anybody in this side of the hospital I don't know if this is gonna help me or not..

_You see the hope that is finally dead,  
She cannot trust for her heart has been bled,  
She won't cry.  
No, she won't cry._

Sesshoumaru didn't try to stop them from sending me here he didn't care! if I cant trust him who am I sopposed to trust...Kikyou? yeah right!!

_You see deaths hand that has glazed her eyes,  
No one saw her die inside,  
They won't cry.  
No, they won't cry._

"Keada, so what you are telling me is that Kagome, lost someone very close to her, and that's what cause her to star cutting" Sesshoumaru spoke from across the desk, waiting for an answer..

"Yes, Sesshoumaru. Its a rather tragic story, Kagome lost her boyfriend in a car relate accident" with that Sesshoumaru was at lost from words. So that was what made her behave like this..

" I belive I can still help her...She has spoken to me more than once, and I belive I can heal her...you must let me transfer to the Hausen area so I cant help her!" he was standing know he couldn't let her just go there with out any help..

"Are you sure this has nothing to do with what happened to Rin" Kaeda looked up to Sesshoumaru. "by helping Kagome, It doesn't change the fact that we lost Rin, Sesshoumaru"

"Just let me help her...please I know I can"


	7. The Kept Promise

The Kept Promise

"Are you sure this has nothing to do with what happened to Rin" Kaeda looked up to Sesshoumaru. "by helping Kagome, It doesn't change the fact that we lost Rin, Sesshoumaru"

"Just let me help her...please I know I can" he wasn't just to begging but something inside told him he had to help Kagome.

"Fine Sesshoumaru, fill out this papers and you can star working with Kagome at the Hausen" with that Sesshoumaru took the papers and left the office. He couldn't let what happened to Rin to repeat again.

After filling out the papers Sesshoumaru went over to his bed were he pulled a photo from under his bed. It was an old picture more than two years old. He stared at the picture before falling asleep.

_It had been the first year he started volunteering at the hospital. When he met her a beautiful girl around the age of seventeen. Rin was her name. At first he refuse to talk to her. He was only doing this for community service. No need to interact with the patients._

_After volunteering for a couple of months, Kaeda had told him that they had a job opening as one of the so called 'partners' and she though that it was the perfect job for him. And he would he would get pay for his job. When they assigned him a partner he was surprise to see none other than Rin waiting for him on the round table in the game room._

_"Good afternoon Rin," he spoke looking down at his papers " Sawada, my name is Sesshoumaru Tashio, and Im your new partner" he spoke waiting for an answer or any kind of questions. When he got none he went back to her file.._

_'Rin Sawada, age seventeen refuses to speak to everybody, started cutting at age 15 due to the loss of her father Mr. Sawada.' Sesshoumaru look down to see what Rin was doing only to find out her wrist where bleeding._

_Not knowing what to do Sesshoumru took her wrist and pulled her to the sink where he washed her cuts. "Rin, I was hire to help you out, and that's what I plan on doing. But if you want to die, I want you to tell so I don't waste yours or my time." he wrapped toilet paper around her wrist." I'll see you tomorrow" with that he left her alone._

_It had been a couple of weeks since he had started working with Rin and she was making great progress. She had started to talk to him and the people around. She had even made some friends around the hospital. When Rin met Kikyou a fifteen year old girl from the hospital they became close 'friends'._

_It was October when things started changing. Rin stopped talking little by little. And she stopped talking to everyone but Kikyou and himself. On October 31 things went down hill._

_It was her fathers death anniversary when she started cutting again. Everything was fine until she left with Kikyou on a hospital field trip._

_On November 23 Sesshoumaru was looking for Rin. He walked through the hallway when he ran into Kikyou who ran out of the bathroom. Before he knew it Kikyou had her arms around him.._

_"Oh Sesshoumaru its horrible! Horrible." He pushed her off and walked into the bathroom. Where all the light where off._

_"Hello?" he pushed every stall door open until he found what he was looking for...Rin_

_He checked her pulse, he still had time. He picked her up and ran out of the bathroom. He could hear her moan in pain. Than he felt her hand on his cheek.._

_"Im sorry I couldn't stop her" she said as her hand slid of his cheek. He ran faster to the office but it was too late. After a couple of minutes Kaeda came back out with bloody hands._

_"Im sorry Sesshoumaru she's dead" said Kaeda after checking her pulse...Without knowing Sesshoumaru had fallen in love with her, she was so pure. Everything he wanted. She had promise to get better so they could spend the rest of their lives together, but than..everything changed... And that promes was broken..._

_"I couldn't stop her, couldn't stop"_

Sesshoumaru woke up cover in sweat it had been years since he had this dream. He looked around the room before getting up. When he looked down at the floor he saw Rins picture and picked it up. He needed to help Kagome, he just had to! he couldn't brake his promise.

Kagome woke up when she felt a body on her bed. She opened her eyes to find a someone sitting on her bed. A few inches away.

"Good morning miss" the man said looking into her eyes. Something about him she didn't like. "you need to get ready, therapy starts in ten minutes" with that he walked to her doorless door.

"By the way. miss my name is Naraku, Im the cleaning assistant, And if you need anything" he looked her up and down and winked at her "I do mean many thing just call" he walked out leaving her with many questions in her mind.

Kagome got up and got her clothes before running out of her room to the bathroom? _OK where was the bathroom in this place?_ She kept on walking trying to find the bathroom and before she knew it she was on the floor. Looking up her eyes met a very sleepy Inuyasha.

"Watch were your going!" Inuyasha spoke, rubbing his sleepy eyes before looking down at Kagome. And stretching out his hand. Kagome took it and slowly got up .

"Sorry!" surprise at herself she smile at him.

Inuyasha looked away when he saw Kagome smiling. After a seconds he look back at her to find her picking her clothes and bathing supplies off the floor. Next thing he knew he was on the floor helping her. They both got up and Inuyasha spoke to her, after noticing she didn't speak much.

"The bathroom is that way" he said pointing to the opposite direction she was going. Kagome smile up at him before turning around and running to the bathroom. _Oh! great another door-less door_. she thought when she looked at the bathroom.

Kagome walked in and took a quick shower and dressed, afraid of people walking in on her. After brushing her hair, she heard a knock on the wall, so she turned around to find none other than Sesshoumaru waving at her.

"Good morning Kagome, Higurashi my name is Sesshoumaru Tashio, and Im your new partner" this time he didn't spect anything from Kagome but what happen surprise him in every way.

_"Im gonna help you Kagome, and your gonna smile and talk none stop... I promise"_

Kagome dropped her hair brush and walked over to him until their bodies where touching before she wrapped her hands around his waist.

" You kept your promise!" this was the first time in a years that she had cried out off happiness and not sorrow.


	8. SPEAK!

"SPEAK!!"

"Good morning Kagome, Higurashi my name is Sesshoumaru Tashio, and Im your new partner" this time he didn't spect anything from Kagome but what happen surprise him in every way.

_"Im gonna help you Kagome, and your gonna smile and talk none stop... I promise"_

Kagome dropped her hair brush and walked over to him until their bodies where touching before she wrapped her arms around his waist.

" You kept your promise!" this was the first time in a years that she had cried out off happiness and not sorrow.

He was hugging her there was no doubt about it and all she knew was that she liked the feeling. She felt that her life was changing. Sure, she didn't have her family but that didn't matter at that moment. All that matter was that she had Sesshoumaru...And that he had kept his promise.

"Kagome! where are you?!" came a scream from the hall way. Crap! she had forgotten she had therapy. With out thinking she let go of Sesshoumaru and grabbed her stuff. She was late for her first day of therapy. Great!

Before she picked her hair brush off the floor she found a girl standing next to Sesshoumaru.

"Well, hello there" The girl thats scared of the dark spoke looking up at sesshoumaru. "Im Sango... and who might you be"

"Good morning...miss Sango.. im Sesshoumaru" they shook hands before Sango turn to face me. And giving me a weird, not to mention crepy smile.

"Kagome, here you are..you are like ten minutes late for therapy! thats really bad!" she grabbed my wrist before pulling me out of the door.

"nice to meet you Sesshoumaru" she stop there waiting for me to say bye to the man at the door.

"Speak in therapy...Kagome, I'll see you later.." he spoke before we left him alone in the bathroom. With a smile on his lips, he look different. He looked happy?

we walked in silence for what seemed for hours. We stopped at my room to drops my stuff off before sango decided to talk to me.

"So Kagome was that you boyfriend?" OK not the kind of question I would ask a stranger but i guess she curious.

"No" I answer, I guess it's time i try to get better I'll talk to her. I mean I guess even I need friends. Not to mention I want to get out off here.

"What!!... you mean to tell me that the handsome man that was in the bathroom! The Bathroom! with you was not your boyfriend!!" OK maybe I should have just kept quiet...this girl is too weird! not to mention loud!

"yeah " with that we walk into the therapy room. the room went silent, before all eyes where on me. I looked around before I saw something I wasn't expecting to see at all on this place...Not on the Hausen.

"Hi Kagome" There she was the girl that had made my life a living hell outside of the hospital. The girl that had tried to take Kouga away from her. The girl that had blamed me for Kougas death from day one. The girl who had in someway made me start cutting...none other than Ayame Satoru, Kougas very first girlfriend.

I though this place was for sick people so what is she doing here? Sure she was Evil! And kind of psycho but that doesn't mean she has to be here.

"Im glad you decided to join us Kagome" I nodded and walked over to the empty chair next to Inuyasha.

"Since we all introduced ourself yesterday, I think its time for Kagome to tell us about her self" The strange woman spoke, I never did get her name...

"Why are you here Kagome?" the germaphobic guy asked. I closed my eyes trying to ignore them but just then I remembered that I had to speak! Sesshoumaru told me I had to speak!! and I just couldn't let him down.

"I..Umm.." I cough I cant tell them my problems! they wont understand me! I close my eyes I don't want to be here anymore I want to go with sesshoumaru. I want my therapy to continue.

"Kagome..are you okay?" I open my eyes when I feel someone touching my shoulder.

"Yeah, Im okay...Im here because I cut my self" I say looking at the floor, Im so upset of myself.

"It's okay kagome were all here because we all have problems, but don't worry you'll be cure in a matter of time"

After therapy I walk back to my room and lay down on my bed. I don't even know why, we get left alone here. we don't have a system like on the other side of the hospital. we don't have people following us. its weird.

"Kagome" I look up to see Inuysha standing next to my door. For some weird reason he wont come in here. so I just look at him.

"may I come in?" well thats weird why didn't he just walked inside my room like the weird man this morning.. I nod and wait for him to get all the way in the room.

"can i help you with something?" I ask him. I didn't know I was so good starting conversations, especially when I don't feel like talking Yay! me!

"yes, I just wanted to know what happened to Kouga" just then there was someone knocking on my door. Both Inuyasha and I looked up to see Sesshoumaru standing there.

"Inuyasha what are you doing here?" Sesshoumaru asked before stepping in the room.

"What are you doing here, Sesshoumaru?" Inuyasha asked, as he got up from the bed and walked up to Sesshoumaru. "you need to ask, before coming in" with that he left the room.

"Kagome, follow me" with out knowing what else to do I got up and followed sesshoumaru. we made a couple of turns and stopped in front of a door.

"we're going to start therapy today" he said walking over to a chair and sitting down. "come on, take a seat" I walked and sat across from sesshoumaru.

"OK Kagome" he said as he took a notebook out and a pen " tell me why did you started cutting," he said looking at me "how did this began?"


	9. First Time

First Time

We're going to start therapy today" he said walking over to a chair and sitting down. "come on, take a seat" I walked and sat across from Sesshoumaru.

"OK Kagome" he said as he took a notebook and pen out, and looked straight at me "so Kagome tell me about yourself"

I looked down at my lap and back at him. What exactly did he wanted to know. I didn't even know how to describe myself how was I supposed to do this. The look on his face changed and he spoke again.

"Kagome, have you heard of the game twenty questions?" I though this was weird but I knew he wanted to help me, he just didn't know how.

I nod and he continues "OK we are going to play this game and you have to answer all of my questions..." he stops for a second to write stuff down "OK?" I look at him and answer.

"yes" I said not taking my eyes off him. One down nine-teen to go!

"Why do you do this Sesshoumaru? Why do you work here?" I ask him and he looks up at me.

"What!?!" He seems surprise that I asked him something. I think he was the only one that was going to ask questions. But it's too late to take my question back.

"Why do you work here?" I look at him still not taking my eyes of him "Why?"

"I.. I like it here, I like to help people" was his only answer. And truth be told I love his answer.

"Kagome, did you like your school?" what kind of question was that. I could tell he was trying to change the conversation...

"I guess I did" I said but honestly I couldn't remember pass the day I went to the nurses office.

"Tell me what was your school was like?" he said writing stuff down.

"It was like any other school" I said looking at the wall to my right. White.

"How so?"

"I don't know, classes, friends, teachers, boyf-the usual" I turned to look at him.

"Did you have a boyfriend?" he asked looking up from his paper " a special someone?" This time he didn't write stuff down. He just looked at my lips than my up to my eyes.

"Yes..." I looked to my left. White..

"Tell me about him?" He began writing stuff down...NO! I wanted to scream at him or at least just ran away from him. I couldn't talk about Kouga...I just couldn't.

"I thought we were playing twenty questions?" I said trying to change the conversation this time. I Just didn't want to talk about Kouga I wasn't ready....

He looked at the clock. two-thirty....

I got to ask him many things, and the time flew by so fast. I learned that his favorite color was silver, He was the oldest of two.. Inuyasha was his half-brother. He was single, with a very kind heart, typical questions I guess....I also Learned that he started working here for community service, and ended up staying..

"Kagome this is my last question, and probably the hardest one I'll asked you so far" he said looking up from his paper at me " tell me why did you started cutting," he said looking at me "how did this began?"

I look at him, I don't really understand the question 'how did this began?' I ask myself. I try to think of the first time I ever cut myself but I cant seem to remember. I close my eyes trying to think, trying to remember, trying to go back in time back to the first time I ever cut myself.

"Kagome, are -you OK?" I look up to see Sesshoumaru still looking at me."Kagome, are you OK?" he said stretching his arm over the table and touching my hand. "you spaced out?"

"Yeah, Im fine." I said looking at him and than down at where his hand laid, On top of mine. With out thinking I pulled my hand away from his.

"How did your cutting began Kagome?" I close my eyes this time determined to remember the very first time I cut. The very first time when my nightmare began and became a reality.

_All I could hear were cries as I entered the funeral home nothing but cries. Every single body in the room was dressed in black. The room walls were the only white thing. The chairs and tables everything the carpet was black everything was black, beside the walls and the casket in the room._

_I walked up to Kougas parents who hugged me as their tears escaped their eyes. We sat together for the ceremony. Waiting for this to be over. And that the priest began speaking._

_"We have gathered here to honor our beloved Kouga Haturu. He was a son , grandson, friend and a respected member of this church. He attended school for ten years, he was a champion basketball, football and baseball star, and many of his friends and family are here with us today. We will all miss him and his winning smile and his wonderful attitude towards life and his generosity to his friends and to strangers. He always said, " Life is to be lived to the fullest" and he certainly did. So let us bow our heads and pray for our brother so he may rest in peace and know that we will never forget him. " he said stepping away so that anyone that wanted could give a speech._

_I looked at the door as I saw Kougas grandmother walking inside with a handful of blue roses (the same color as Kougas eyes), which I though rather weird. She walked past me and gave me a very hateful glare. I paid no attention to her, but some how that made my eyes fill up with tears._

_Kougas grandmother walked up to the microphone and began to give her speech. "To have a grandson as caring and giving as he was, was incredible. He loved everyone, and help everyone in every way he could, even if it meant risking his life" she stopped to look at me. "he gave his life for a worthless girl" she said still looking at me with those very hateful eyes, my tears began spilling down my face. I looked down trying to sink into the chair with out any success.._

_When I looked up I saw a couple of man pulling Kougas grandma off the stage. she was screaming and kicking trying to get free from their hold. She kept screaming, stuff I couldn't understand until they pass in front of me. She threw the blue roses at me._

_"You kill him!! you little BITCH!!! You KILLED my grandson!!!" she screamed as she was drag out of the room. I picked a rose from my lap and ran out the door. It was my fault that Kouga was dead, it was my fault all this people where depressed and it was all because of me._

_I ran down the street trying to get home but my tears made everything to blurry, and I couldn't concentrate. all I could hear is Kougas grandmother screaming at me. Screaming at the murderer that Im am....screaming at her grandsons killer!_

_When I finally get home everything was silent, not a single sound come from the house everyone was at the funeral saying bye to my love. I look at my hand when I feel it getting wet. The thorns from the flower had cut through my hand and it was now bleeding._

_I ran to the bathroom and put my hand over the sink and start washing my wound. But the pain from the cuts makes me relax somehow. And than I look down at the sink and see my blood go down the sink, that makes my feel better, and it makes me wonder if Kouga is waiting for me if he wants me with him._

_I open the door next to the sink to get a band aid, but what I find is a razor. I look at it and think for a moment if the small hole in my hand feels good, what would a bigger hole feel? I take the blade and look in the mirror and what I see scares me but than i really don't care._

_I see a girl smiling at me. Her eyes look empty and she holds a knife. She lifted the blade to her arm and very slowly applied presser to arm just on the underside of the wrist, where you could clearly see her blue veins. I look down at my arm and see the blood. I want to stop it but I wont I want to feel this I want to scream, I want to cry but I wont! No, not anymore! not know that I've found this...this beautiful pain._

_I lift the blade to my arm again, I feel the stabs of pain as I cut into my wrist. Blood started to flow from the wound and I smile against the pain. I started to move the metal down my arm, cutting a smooth, sharp, thin line in my arm. Blood swelled and dripped from the place, I gasped as the pain shots through but, with it came a feeling of satisfaction and relaxation._

"are you OK Kagome? you spaced out again" Sesshoumaru said this time standing in front of me, his hand under my chin making sure Im looking at him.

"yes..Sesshoumaru it began" I say still looking at him as he holds my chin "after Kougas funeral"


	10. Dreams & Darkness

_Italic- Kagome's Dream...just so you' all don't get messed up on it cause it's kinda weird & in the normal writing she's waking up.._

**Dreams & Darkness**

"Are you OK Kagome? you spaced out again" I said this time standing in front of her, for some unknown reason my hand was now under her chin, and something was pulling me towards her.

Something in me just wanted to take her pain away. Something in me wanted to heal her wounds with a simple kiss, but deep down I knew that it wouldn't solve anything.

"Yes..Sesshoumaru it began" I hear her speak but deep down I don't want her to, I want to treasure this moment to freeze in time. "after Kougas funeral"

After hearing a very familiar name I let go of her chin and walk back to my desk. I know that I shouldn't feel this attracted to a patient but something about her needs me..

"I'll see you next Monday Kagome" I tell her as I get up and walked her to the door. She looked sad but some how happy at the same time...

"Sesshoumaru?" I stop behind her before she turns around and looks up at me. "Thanks for not giving up on me" she said before holding my face and giving me an kiss on the cheek. She smiles and walks off..

I do the same I smile at her when she turns, and walks away from the Housen area. I need some time off....

"Sesshoumaru are you sure about this?" Kaeda asked as I get ready to leave the hospital.

"Yes, I need some time off... I need some sort of vacation?" I say as I walk over to my car and get in.

"But Sesshoumaru, didn't you just said Kagome is making improvement? Why would you leave her now?" Kaeda said as I start the car.

"I'll be back soon" And with that I drive off... to a different place, a different place away from her.

From Kagome...

After therapy I walk to the bathroom. For some unknown reason, since my talk with Sesshoumaru I began feeling rather weird. I walk in and wash my face, And try to stop my heart from beating so fast. Everything seems blurry but I ignore it.

As I began to dry my face I hear foot steps. I remove the towel from my face and see her: Ayame Satoru.

Ayame and I had been the best of friends before we found out we liked the same guy. And after that she hated my guts... big time.

She never did get over the fact that I dated Kouga. I always knew she held a grudge against me. But I really could care less after all when I started to date Kouga I only cared about him and no one else..

"Hi Kagy, haven't seen you in ages" she said with a hateful glare. I said nothing I just stared at her. " I can't belive I haven't seen you since you..umm how do you say? you killed Kouga? am I right?"

I don't answer her question. I look above her head. Why is she here? What could she passably fear or do to be at the Housen area?

When I look back at her face I notice she's crying. And for some unknown reason it makes me feel kind of bad. Than 'She' begins walking towards me.

Right now she kind of creepy! I mean why cry out off nowhere, stop and smile like a fucking psycho. I look back at her face and see her smiling..very twisted I might add.

"Ayame? Are you OK?" I ask her trying to be friendly even though she was being a bitch!

"Why couldn't you just let me run you over!" she screamed out of the top of her lungs. "Why couldn't you just die!?!"she screamed less than a foot away from me before slapping me across my face, making me loss my balance and fall to the floor.

Now I ask my self 'am I the target for slapping around the hospital! do I have a shirt or something around me that tell the patients around here that slapping me is OK!' but ofcourse i dont say a word.

"why did he ran in front of the car!!! Why?!? why did he push you out of the way!" I looked up at her as she screamed. Before I knew it another blow pushes my head against the tile floor..

"why couldn't I kill you" she screamed and with out knowing my tears began to spill out of my eyes. I slowly get up and try to remain standing.

"Cry you little bit-"

"Ayame!" there's a nurse at the door screaming so I turn to look at her I'm save- "Ayame put it down!...!"I slowly turn back to look a Ayame, and out of the corner of my eyes, I see an object fly from her hand. I try to stop it but a sever pain comes from my hands and than my stomach before the darkness took over my body.

Darkness....

_Ghosts keep me up at the time of darkness even though I see nothing but blackness. I squirm, and yell but no help comes. It's hopeless._

_My desperate screams are silent and no one rushes down the hall. I see blood and more blood. My wrist are bleeding. There's nothing to save me from my nightmare. Suddenly, I see his face and jolt up. His beautiful face, his smile, his eyes, his hair. Than the air fills up with his scent. He's here in the room with me... my Kouga._

_Slowly I sit up and place my lips on top of his before kissing him._

"I love you" I say touching his face and chest.

"Lay down Kagome" everything sounds so far away but I lay my bed.

_My blood keeps spilling. I do nothing to stop it, all I can do is stare at Kouga and thats what I do. I stare as the blood is drain from my body._

_But there's a man. He looks familiar, yet I have never seen him in my life. His evil, cunning smile slit my soul, my body ceases to move and there I stay; frozen. When will this nightmare ever end?_

_The man walks towards me with a a pink box between his hands. 'here' he says. i take the box no questions asked. But than i turn to look at Kouga who know is getting ran over by a car. what the hell is going on!_

"Kagome!" I feel myself being moved, "Don't close your eyes....stay with me"

_The strange thing is that this time I don't cry, nor scream. I look at the blood spill from his body and my writ yet I don't move an inch. I look at the box in front of me._

_The Box is so beautiful, Pink. But no ordinary pink. It has red sparkles all over it. I look at it for a minute before I open it._

_I take the lid off the box rather slowly and than a light blinds me. Before me is a pice of metal. I look at shining metal,The sharp edge shines in the dim light, Flashing silver every time I move it. I pause for a second, thinking about why or how I got this._

_I hold the metal with my right arm...and let the blade cut lightly into my skin. Not deep enough to feel the pain. I see the blood cascading down my wrist than foot. I stare at it._

_Minutes ticked by I debated whether to make another cut within my flesh, my fingers, reached down,Smoothed out the blood, It stained Into the lines, of my skin, ran down my foot, I smeared it, curled my fist into a ball plunged it under a river of blood, before my thoughts could make me fall._

As I regain consciousness, I feel a warm sensation rundown my stomach and my eyes snap open when i hear someone speak. Everything is blurry but as I focus I see Inuyasha sitting on my bed.

"Kagome?" I look up and see Inuyasha his face covered in blood. for some unknown reason my eyes feel heavy. I loosing my consciences. but than I open my eyes bigger.

"Inuyasha, you're bleeding" I say trying to sit up but the pain is too strong and the darkness takes over full force...

_Darkness._


	11. The Fallen Message

_Italic- Sesshoumaru's Dream... & in the normal writing he Wakes up.. its very _

**_The Fallen Message._**

I'm half the way to my home. My real home when I get a call on my cell phone. And to my surprise it was a call from the hospital the place that I had been trying to run away from. I look at the screen on my phone and throw it back on the passenger sit.

I'm not ready to go back; I have to think my feelings through. After all I had already made the mistake of falling in love with a patient before and I don't think I could go through it again.

I'm more than an hour away from the hospital when the phone rings again. I picked it from the passenger sit and turn the volume down. I'm sure that what ever they want they can solve it with out my help.

I arrive at my home and walk in there, everything is full of dust. I remove the sheets from the sofas. The last time I was here Rin was with me. The house seems so lonely. It looks dead. I walk into the kitchen to find that there is nothing to eat or to drink...

I feel tire and head for my dusty room, I walk in there and take the sheets of the bed and let them fall to the ground. I don't even take my shoes of before a lay on the bed.

I close my eyes and try to picture Rins face but can't seem to manage. All I see is Kagome smiling at me, Kagome hugging me, Kagome kissing my cheek. That's all I remember before finally falling asleep.

_I wake up when a hear Kagome moving around the room. She has a white dress on. And her hair is down. She looks beautiful. She stops in front of the window. Were the only thing giving her light is the big full moon. She turns around and looks at me. And smiles._

_"Oh! Did I wake you?" she says as she walks closer to me. I shake my head no because my I can't seem to find my voice right now. She smiles up at me. Before turning around and spinning around the room._

_"I love it here!" she sings as she spins around the room with her arms stretched out. "It's so beautiful!"_

_I smile at her because this is the only thing I can do for some reason. I look around the room only to find patted white walls, with a big window; I look back at Kagome because she's talking again._

_"You do know how much I love you? Right?" she said walking back to me and wrapping her arms around me. "Do you love me as much as I love you?" she asked after I nodded to her first question._

_"Yes, I love you. I love you Kagome" I tell her as she hugs me closer to her, before kissing my lips. I try to wrap my arms around her to keep her close to me. But I can't._

_"I love you more" she said giggling, and I smile at her. "See!" she said showing me her wrist. "I love you so much I'm willing to die, to be with you" she said smiling, as her wrist began to bleed, yet I couldn't do anything about it. "I love you so much Kouga" and just like that the side of her waist starts bleeding._

_"Kagome, I'm Sesshoumaru" I tell her as I step closer to her. But I can't get close because everything turns black. I'm too late, she loves another, she would die for the other, and she doesn't love me!_

_I love her..I've fallen for a patient again. I've fallen for Kagome._

_Out of nowhere a mirror appears and I see why I couldn't move my arms. My arms are bounded by a white jacket. I've gone crazy, in at the patted room in the hospital. I'm a patient! I close my eyes trying to wake up. I must be dreaming! I must._

_When I open my eyes again I'm not in a patted room anymore. I'm in a room full of mirrors and Kagome is gone! I look at the mirror and what I see makes me take a step back, I'm not myself. I'm Kouga!_

_**Ring...Ring...Ring...**_

I open my eyes when I hear my phone ringing. I can't see anything because the sun is blinding my eyes. But somehow I find the phone and answer it.

"Hello?" I speak into the phone as I rub the sleep off my eyes. And wait for who ever is calling me to speak.

I wait.

And wait...

And wait...

"Sesshoumaru is that you?" I recognize this voice anywhere. After all who doesn't recognize the voice of their boss?

"Of course it me, Kaeda" I speak rather board.

"I've been calling you from the last couple of days" she sounds worried and angry at the same time. "Are you alright Sesshoumaru? I tried calling you on Thursday right after you left and couldn't get a hold of you?"

"Yes I'm fine. Why were you calling?"

"Oh its not important anymore she's all better now" she said as if drifting away. "Nothing to worry about anymore, but you need to get back to work Sesshoumaru it's already Monday and you're late" She said before hanging up.

It's Monday that means that I slept for more than four days. I don't know what went on at the hospital but something bad obviously happened, for them to have called so many times.

I decide to check my mail box just to make sure I didn't miss any other important calls.

"Please enter your password" I dial my password and as soon as I do the phone starts going over my messages. "You have twenty new messages. To listen to your messages press one, to send-"I press one and listen.

"Hello, Sesshoumaru this is Kaeda, we need you to come back as soon as possible, there's been an accident with Kagome give me a call when you get this"

The machine talks again and I press one. I listen to the next message.

"Sesshoumaru! It's Inuyasha. Where the fuck are you! I think Kagome is dying and none of her family is here, she's all alone. You best get your ass down here!"

One.

"Sesshoumaru, are you alright you haven't called the hospital back. And is already Saturday. Please give me a call as soon as you can, this is Kaeda by the way"

One

"Sesshoumaru? Hi, this is mother please give me a call, your boss called me and she seemed worried, please call me back"

I stop listening because I figure that the rest are all from the hospital. I decide to take a shower before I live for work. I get ready and leave my home to drive to the hospital.


	12. New Scar

_Italic- past and dreams.._

-New Scar-

_"Kagome! Wait up, I'm coming" Kouga screamed as I walked away from the school._

_**"Why couldn't you just let me run you over?"**_

_I stop and wait for him. But I want to walk away cross the street all the way. But I'm standing here in the middle of the road._

_**"Why did he run in front of the car!!! Why?!? why did he push you out of the way!"**_

_There he was his body on the ground as his bloods poured out and cover the road. There he laid dead. Bleeding, on a puddle of blood. While the only injury I got was scratches on my knees and hands._

_**"Why couldn't I kill you!!!"**_

My eyes snap open.

When I woke up I couldn't remember what had happened at all. All I knew was that I wasn't at the Housen area any more I was at a real hospital. With needles going in and out of my arms.

The first sound I heard before I waking up was a beeping sound that came from the machine to my left. I open my eyes wide to look at it, but someone was in front of it. And I had to look down at the sheets on my bed to look at the person.

At first I though it was Sesshoumaru who's head laid next to my shoulder but when I took a better look at him and removes some of the loose hairs from his face I found none other that Inuyasha resting his head on the side of my bed.

It was a big surprise to see Inuyasha, a guy who didn't even know me that much, and who had no responsibility being here. But I really didn't mind it at all. Having him next to me made me feel save, secure like someone actually cared about me.

For some reason I couldn't take my eyes off him. With out even him knowing he was making me happy, by just sleeping there. He didn't seem that scary anymore.

He sure didn't seem like the guy I met the first day I walked into therapy. The first time I heard him speak, he was do dark and mysterious, he seemed,

Evil.

_"I'm Inuyasha" as soon as he said his first name something about him made me not want to take my eyes off him._

"_I'm 17" everything seemed to be going in slow motion. I could hear every single letter clear._

"_and I'm scared of hurting people..." even though that was the only thing he said I couldn't take my eyes off him for the rest of the therapy._

_After therapy when I was in my room unpacking my stuff, I couldn't help but to think about him and before I knew it he was standing outside my door._

I was playing with his hair when he woke up. He didn't do anything; he didn't move or pushed my hand away. He just sat still.

"Umm… Inuyasha?" only when I said his name he moved to look at me in the eyes.

"Yes?" okay this conversation wasn't taking us anywhere. So I decide to ask my question.

"What happened?" I knew as soon as I asked the question that he thought I was crazy. I mean who doesn't remember exactly why their in the hospital.

"You got stabbed" was the only thing he said. As if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"I got stabbed!?" I screamed sitting up. Before I knew it everything went blurry and my head was back on the bed.

"You can't do that! You'll tare your stitches" he said as he pointed to his side. With out thinking I lifted my shirt to see if what he was saying was the truth.

And there it was a cut as long as my middle finger stitched together. I looked up at Inuyasha who was looking away from me. A new scar, a new baby that I didn't even got to ! I could not be thinking like this I'm supposed to get better here. Im not even supposed to be thinking about cutting.

"When… when did it happen?" I asked him pulling my shirt down so he didn't have to look at my horrible scar.

"It happen three days ago" he said trying to think of something to say. He wanted to add something else but at the same time It look like he just wanted to leave it like that. But he seemed to change his mind at the last second.

"When Sesshoumaru left" he waited for me to say something. I didn't. Sesshoumaru left.

"Thanks" he looked up surprise to hear me thanking him. But I was truly grateful to have him here.

"Ummm…" was the only thing he said I guess I didn't explain exactly why I was thanking him.

"For staying here with me" I said stretching my hand out to touch his cheek since he was looking away "and keeping me company"

He smiled. The very first time I saw him smile. First time I saw how kind his smile was. First time he touched my face.

I stayed with Kagome the rest of the day and during the night I slept in the chair next to her bed with my head next to her shoulder. Not really sleeping but talking and staring at her. Everything was going fine. She told me I was her first friend she had in the hospital. And she didn't know this but, she was my first friend as well.

"Remember when you asked me about Kouga?" Kagome asked me I helped her sit up on the bed. I nodded.

"How did you know I knew him?" she asked. I guess she didn't remember me that well.

"Because he always carried a picture of you in his wallet" I said watching her smile "and I could never get him to shut up about how beautiful and nice you where"

She looked down at the bed. Her hair made a curtain, blocking her face from my view. She was crying I just knew it.

"It's my fault he die" she whispered "I was supposed to get hit, not him"

"Kagome it wasn't your fault, he got run over" but my word didn't make it better she kept looking down, crying. I could see her tears falling on the bed sheet.

Two, little puddles.

"Yes it was!" she screamed finally looking up at me, the look on her face pulls me in. She looks broken. She needs someone to comfort her.

"Ayame wanted to kill me and she killed Kouga!" with out thinking I wrap my arms around her and she try to push me off, but I don't let go. After a second she hugged me back and kept on crying. She looks up and for a second I though she was going to kiss me.

Again


	13. Ignored

-Ignored-

It's early in the morning still but the clouds are hiding the sun. Everything's dark. The lights on my car are on as I drive to the hospital in complete silence.

The ride to the hospital was one of the worst ride in my life. Not only did it start raining half the way there. But I couldn't stop thinking about Kagome. Maybe I was wrong and Kagome wasn't ready.

I had her trusts and I think after this we'll have to start over.

As I walk down the hall way. I keep on asking myself. What could have possibly gone wrong? Why did Kagome start cutting again? Why?

With out thinking I head up to the front desk and ask for Kagome. When the nurse tells me the room number I walk away from her, and take the elevator.

The rain has become worst since I left the house, and I can hear the thunder as the elevator goes up. I find it hard to believe that just this morning the sun was shining so bright.

It makes me feel as if something horrible is about to happen.

I feel like I'm going to receive the worst news in my life, but I know that everything fine. But deep down I can't seem to shake the horrible feeling away.

I finally reach her door and stand outside. My hand seems to have a mind of its own. My hand is frozen and I can't turn the handle. I'm frozen waiting to hear something.

Something that will tell me that it's okay that I wasn't there. That is okay that I missed judge her. That her cutting herself has nothing to do with me. That she made a mistake.

That after I speak to her everything is going to go back to-"I'll be back in like ten minutes ok" someone said before opening the door. "I need to call someone so we can get picked up-"

I step aside to let Inuyasha out of Kagomes' room. What is he doing here? Why isn't he at the hospital! His hospital! Inuyasha closes the door and before I know it he slams me against the wall.

"Where the fuck where you!?" he screams in my face. So I push him of and he falls to the floor. Just the thought that he was with Kagome makes me want to punch him.

"Inuyasha!" I look to my left and see Kagome getting out of her room. She's looking down at Inuyasha and walks over to him and helps him up. "What's wrong?'

She looks up and stares at me. The look on her face makes me take a step back. She looks surprise to see me. She looks disappointed.

Ring.

"Hello?" I answer my phone not taking my eyes off Kagome who seems to be frozen to the ground.

"Sesshoumaru, where are you?" Keada asked as soon as I answer my phone.

"At the hospital" I look away from Kagome and when I turn around she's helping Inuyasha of the floor.

"Do you think you can bring Inuyasha and Kagome back to the hospital?" so she knew that Inuyasha was here. She knew he was here with her.

Inuyasha is standing with his left arm around Kagome and glaring at me a glare that says 'you had your chance, she's mine now'

Kagome on the other hand is looking at the floor with both her arms around herself. Not moving just standing there. Ignoring me!

"Sesshoumaru are you still there?"

"Yeah we'll be there in less than an hour" I don't wait for her to say goodbye before I hand up. I look at Kagome and stretch my hand out for her.

"Lets go" she doesn't move an inch. She's frozen wrapped in Inuyasha arms. Before I know it she's being led to the elevator my hand still stretched out for her to take it. But she already gone, I let my hand fall and walk into the elevator with them.

The ride to the hospital is worst than when I was alone. The clouds are still pouring. But this time they seemed more depressing.

Kagome and Inuyasha are sitting on the back of the car. In complete silent. Kagome's looking out the window and Inuyasha is glaring at me through the mirror.

When we finally get to the hospital Kagome is the first out the door and before either of us can get out of the car she's in the hospital.

I step out of the car and see that Inuyasha is struggling to unbuckle his seat belt. I know that what I'm about to do is immature, and very childish but I need some time alone with Kagome.

I lock all four doors on my car and before I can even start running I hear Inuyasha hitting the car windows trying to get out.

"What the fuck!" he screamed before the hospital door closed behind me.

I walk straight into Kagomes room. But at first look it hard to tell where she is because of the darkness. I turn the lights on and look for her. But when I take a good look around the room and don't see her I start walking out of her room.

I know she's here but I also know that she doesn't want to speak to me. She doesn't want to seem me after not helping her when she needed me the most. I know she's hiding in the closet.

Before I'm out I hear sobbing. She's here crying, hiding from me. I've lost her trust. I've lost her to my brother. I've lost her to a killer.


	14. Nothing But A Dream

-Nothing But A Dream-

I don't really know what happened between me and Sesshoumaru. It has been more than a month since I got here from the hospital and he hasn't been here.

I don't think I have a partner anymore. I guess it's my fault. I shouldn't have hid from him that day he picked me up. But when I saw him I felt like something had change.

I felt the so many emotions. I felt like nothing else matter. Like everything was going to be fine. He was here, sure he was late but he was here with me.

"Let's go Kagome!" I look up to see Inuyasha walking towards me. Ever since the hospital Inuyasha and I have been inseparable. Where ever I am, he is bound to be there.

I get up and walk with him. We have therapy again. Everyone is there with their partners but me. I sit alone. This whole month I have.

Everyone's talking when I get up but nobody seems to notice. Not even the therapist. I walk to the door and look back. I'm not important anymore. I don't matter.

Can't people tell that I'm going backwards? That I'm not improving at all since he left? That I barely talk? That I'm depressed again?

I don't know how long it will take for me to start cutting again, even if I don't want to I can sort of see it coming.

The fact that Sesshoumaru hasn't been here answers all of my questions. I'm all alone. It has been months since I last saw my mother, my family. I don't even remember their faces anymore.

With each day that passes. The outline In the mirror becomes clearer. With every day I can see his eyes more clearly. In a matter of days I'm sure that he's going to be back. But I'm not sure I want him back anymore.

I walk into the bathroom and sit against the wall. I don't even know what I did wrong. He was the one that left me. He was the one that was supposed to help me. He was the one that made fall in love with him.

I sit on the floor and close my eyes and listen to the silence. Nobody is here. Everyone is at the therapy room practically on the other side of the hospital. I listen to the water drip from the sink and showers.

"Good morning miss" I look up to see the janitor at the door looking down at me, with that strange look in his eyes. "What brings you here?" he said walking slowly into the bathroom.

A soon as he took the first step I was up and ready to leave. I didn't answer him. I had to get out of there, that man freaked me out.

"Hello, my dear." He said to me, giving me a smile. "Are you felling ok?" he said after he notice I wasn't talking to him.

"Yeah" I whispered walking towards the door with my hair hiding most of my face trying to block him from seeing me. But he stood in front of me blocking my exit.

"I don't know how to say this with out sounding like a 'mental Patient' but" He said as he walked closer to me, each step perfect and sinister. "You are pretty" he said as he stood less than a foot away from me.

His hand stretched out until he touched my cheek. As soon as I felt his long cold fingers on my skin I pushed him away. He turned around to face me with a wicked smile forming across his face.

His smile seemed so devious and creepy like his eyes. I never felt so terrified in my life. My heart pounded in my chest, my chest heaved up and down heavily, and my eyes were full of fear. Everything about this man scared me.

I started walking back to the door. I was practically running by now. When he got hold on my wrist. Making my bones crush together. I struggled one more time to free myself from his fingers...but his hold on my wrist tightened until I heard something snap making me scream in pain. But as soon as my screamed escaped my lips his cold hand blocked it. With out knowing what to do I bit down on his hand.

The man growled and back handed me, I hit floor hard, my head hitting the ground then reverberating and hitting it again. My site dimmed and when it came back, after a second or two, I saw the man in front of me, He walked closer to me.

My breathing got louder and my chest heaved up and down with every step he took. My chest all of a sudden became tight and heavy. For some reason I had a hard time breathing. I couldn't breathe at all. That's when I panicked even more which caused me to have more trouble with my breathing.

"Relax dear, you're hyperventilating, just relax" He touched my shoulder "Breathe and calm down." sitting down on the ground beside me.

"See there's no reason to be rude" he said as he began stroking my hair. ""Your hair…it's so long and shiny. How do you get it like that?" he asked lifting a strand up to his nose and sniffing it. "And your eyes! You are the most beautiful girl I've ever seen"

He let my hair fall and moved on to my face. I felt so light headed; I didn't even bother to slap his hand away. My eyes felt heavy.

He started rubbing my cheek. "Your skin is so flawless and soft" he said as he moves his fingers to my lips. "I wonder" he said moving his face closer to mine. He leaned down and kissed me on the lips, holding onto my face with one strong hand.

"Just as I though!" he said rubbing my cheek again "delicious and soft" I try to push my self up again but he wouldn't let me. He slammed my head against the tile floor.

"Why?" I asked as my eyes filed with tears. My head was killing me.

"Because I love you, that's why!" he was so happy it frighten me. He kissed my lips again this time with more force and demanding more. His hand slowly making its way to my breast before his stops and pulls his hand out of my shirt.

"Darling" he said rubbing my cheek "you must tell no one about this and tomorrow you'll be in for a surprise" he said touching my hair.

"Besides no one in this place will believe you" he lowered his lips to my neck "because this is nothing but a" he kisses my lips before putting a cloth on top of my mouth and nose "dream" everything goes dark.

"Is she ok?" I hear someone speaking but she sounds far away.

"I think she's waking up!" I know this voice is Inuyasha. What's going on? I snap my eyes open to see everyone from therapy around me.

"What's going on?" I ask after I find my voice. Someone is picking me up. I look up to see Inuyashas' worried face.

"Take her to her room Inuyasha" Kaeda said as she walks towards her office.

"You fell down the stairs" he said walking into my room and laying me on the bed. "You always forget when you get hurt" he said smiling at me. But I couldn't smile back.

My dream seemed so realistic. Not to mention my wrist hurts and my head is killing me.

"_Besides no one in this place will believe you because this is nothing but a dream"_


	15. Existance::::

::::Existance::::

_**You know that girl you take care of?**_

**_That beautiful cutter? __She's going to _**

**_be mine. __After all she and I where _**

**_meant to be...__Today was our first kiss… _**

**_can you believe that!!__Too bad she wasn't _**

**_cooperating else __she wouldn't have had to _**

**_get so badly hurt __:sad: But tomorrow she's _**

_**getting her wedding present…**_

I don't know who the person that left the message in my phone was, but it makes me uncomfortable. Sure I stopped visiting Kagome because I thought that was what she wanted. I mean she's in the hospital, she's safe there. There is nothing that can cause her actual harm. Especially since they removed Ayame, right?

But here I was getting dressed with unbelievable speed. Trying to hurry to get to where Kagome was. If what the message said was saying was true, Kagome had been hurt last night. I needed to find out what was going on.

I walked through the hospital hallway until I reached the Housen door. I took out my card and open the door. I had to find Kagome, I had to speak to her and this time nothing would stop me.

I went into the therapy room to find it empty all the light off. Now that I think about it all the lights in the hospital were off. I walked down the hallway trying to find the office. When I finally made it there the room was empty. What was going on?

I stretched my arm in front of my face to check the time. Four fifteen. It was four fifteen in the morning. No wonder, there wasn't anybody in the hospital. The staff didn't arrive until eight in the morning.

I walked until I found Kagomes room. The lights were off. The room was in complete darkness. I looked over at the bed to make sure she was sleeping but the bed was empty. I walked slowly into the room.

I looked to the left of the room where I found her sitting on the corner of the room holding her left arm. She wasn't moving she just sat there like a room decoration. She looked lifeless. I walked closer to her, and that's when I heard her whipering to herself.

"it was only a dream, it was only a dream" But she didn't move. I sat on the ground so I was a few feet away from her.

"Kagome?" I said as I stretched my arm out for her. "Are you ok?" as soon as she heard my voice her eyes snapped open and she looked at me. She didn't say a word or made a single sound as a tear slid down her cheek.

Before I could say anything else she had her arms around my neck. Still not making a single sound. But I could feel her tears on my neck. She was shaking. The message was no lie…

"I. I though you hated me" she whispered into my neck as her shoulders shook "Why didn't you come back?" she asked as her arms tightened around my neck. "I needed you! And you just threw me away!"

"I'm sorry-" I try to apologize but she wouldn't take it, she wouldn't listen! she just cried.

"I needed you so badly!"

"Kagome, what's wrong?" I asked her as I pull her off so I could see her face. Her tears were falling, its hard to believe that a couple of months ago, she was dare I say it, happy.

"I don't know!" she said as she let go of my neck to hug her knees up to her chest. "I feel like I don't exist any more" she spoke into her knees.

I stare at her not knowing what to say. Never had I seen her like that. Not even when we first met. She seemed desperate. Like she truly believed she didn't exist.

"What are you talking about?" I ask not sure what she saying. "You exist!" I tell her trying to calm her down.

"Only to you! I only exist to you because I'm your job!" she said hugging her knees tighter "you get paid to be here with me-"

"No- "I try to speak to her to make her understand that I'm not here just because is my job, but because I want to. Before I'm cut off by her. She's looking up at me. Her tears falling, what happened?

"Sesshoumaru I haven't seen my parents since I got dropped here" she wipes her tears away with one hand. "They are my parents and they left me! What make you think that I'm going to believe that you're here because you care what happens to me? Because you want to see me?"

"I'm here not because it is my job! I want to see you get better" I hold her chin so she can looks at me "I want to see you happy" she doesn't say anything. I don't think she believes me. I don't think she trusts me anymore. She's just staring. No emotions in her eyes.

Nothing

"I'm here, nobody knows I'm here right know" I tell her as her tears make contact with my hand "I'm here because I wanted to know you where fine"

I stare at her. There is something wrong. She looks up and smiles. The thing that makes me worried about her smile is that it doesn't reach her eyes.

"I'm fine" she said looking down at her wrist before rubbing her bruised wrist "Nothing I can't handle"

That's when I notice her wrist. It looks swollen. I grab her wrist and stare at it for a second before letting it go and walking to where the light switch is. I turn the light on and what I see surprised me.

Kagome is looking up at me. Her eyes are red and puffy. She had been crying for a longer time than I've been here. Her wrist is a deep purple that fades into blue. I walk back to her to get a better look at it.

"What happened to you wrist?" I ask her as I take a hold of it again. There are four horizontal stripes, like a hand print. I stare at it until Kagome pulls her hand away.

"I fell down the stairs?" she said wiping her tears away. I don't know what to think now. But I don't believe her, something happened that she's not telling me.

"Kagome…" I say trying to change the conversation "why weren't you sleeping when I got here?" I ask her as I sit next to her, my back against the wall. She wiped her tears away.

"I couldn't sleep" she said jawing "I kept having nightmares" she said putting her head on my shoulder.

I froze. Everything seemed to stop. She was here with me and that was all that matter, and most importantly she wasn't crying any more.

"I'm glad you're back" she said kissing my shoulder. "Even if it's just for a dream"

"What are you talking about?" I ask her but I don't get an answer. She's quiet. I think she's sleeping.

"I was afraid of-" she stops talking. Everything is silent. She's fallen a sleep. I close my eyes as I rest my head on top of hers. I didn't know I missed her so much until now.

Darkness


	16. Dry Blood

**_&:*:Dry Blood:*:&_**

_I dont own inuyasha_

_::::Inuyasha::::_

"Inuyasha" I hear someone calling my name so I open my eyes. I don't know what time it is but I don't care! All I know is that someone woke me up before eight. That makes me furious! _Calm down Inuyasha you don't want to loose control_ I think as I sit up on my bed and look at my door.

The janitor! What the fuck is the janitor doing at my door! He's not even supposed to be where the rooms are! His only job is to clean the bathrooms and the 'class rooms' what is he doing here! And most importantly why does he look, mad.

"May I come in?" he asks as he takes a step in my room. I get up and grab a shirt. Hold on a sec. Where is his uniform?

"What do you want Naraku? You're not supposed to be here" I sit back on my bed and stare at him. But he doesn't say a word "well what do _You_ want?"

"Inuyasha, I've notice that you care about Kagome a great lot" he said looking back at my door. Into Kagomes room "I need your help, I need to get Kagome out of here! She's in danger" he said walking closer to me until he was about three feet away from me.

"What are you talking about?" I ask. Not sure why he's even talking about Kagome. I don't even know how he knows about her. I don't believe they have ever talked. Ever!

"It's Sesshoumaru, I believe that he has hurt her" he said walking back to the door. "Yesterday, before we found Kagome on the bottom of the stair, I heard them talking" he looks back at me "they were fighting" he keep looking at me "he's with her right now"

"What are you talking about?" he's confusing me.

"I think he might have hurt her I don't think she fell down the stairs" now this I understand, I jump of my bed. I'm about to go across the hall to see if what the janitor is saying is true. But he stops me.

"We need to get her out of here" he said "bring her to the guys' bathroom on Saturday so we can leave" With that he walks to my door getting ready to leave.

"Why should I believe you? Let along help you get her away from here, from me?" I ask, not moving an inch. He turns around and smiles.

"Have you told Kagome why you're here? Have you told her about Kouga? About" I don't know how he knows about Ayame and me. "Ayame?"

I can't let Kagome find out why I'm here she would hate me. She would kill me. Naraku tells me the plan and walks out of my room. We have to get Kagome away from Sesshoumaru for her own safety.

_::::Sesshoumaru::::_

I don't know what time it is but I'm starting to hear footstep out on the hall way. I open my eyes slowly and for a minute I don't know where I am. I feel out place but somehow I feel like I am where I'm supposed to be.

I look around to find out I'm on the ground. I was sleeping on the ground. I try to sit up and that's when I first notice her. Kagome, her head is resting on top of my chest and she's sleeping.

I watched her sleep until I heard someone walk into the room. I looked up from my spot to see Inuyasha standing in front of us. He looked furious. He looked as if he truly belonged here.

"What the fuck are _you_ doing here?" she said walking closer to me. "Well?" he says after I don't answer. He bends over and in a blink of an eye Kagome is on his arms. She stirs but doesn't wake up.

"Well what are you doing here? You can't be here! You don't work here anymore!" he said walking up to Kagomes bed and laying her down. "What did you do to Kagome! Why isn't she walking up?" he places his hands on her shoulders and shakes her.

"Don't do that!" I walk up to him and push him away from her. Was he the one that hurt her? "Get away from her" I look down at Kagome she's waking up. Her eyes are opening slowly.

She sits up but doesn't seem to notice us. She just sits there rubbing her head. Her eyes open wide in shock as she stretches her hands out in front of her face. Before standing up.

She looks my way but something wrong. She doesn't seem focus, and her eyes star filling up with tears. She takes a few steps before tripping on a shoe and falling.

Both Inuyasha and I are on the ground. Looking down at her. She starts crying. Covering her eyes. "Kagome?" Inuyasha and I say together. Her head shoots up and her eyes open again.

"Kagome are you ok?" I ask her as I touch her shoulder. Her head turns my way. Her tears fall faster. But she doesn't speak. She stays quiet.

"Kagome?"

"There's something wrong with my eyes!" she screams crying louder. Inuyasha just stares at me. I can see the hate spilling from his eyes. But I can also see his concern.

"What did you do to her?" Inuyasha screams trowing a punch at me, but missing me by a few inches.

Kagome tries to get up but I stop her.

"Kagome, what's wrong with your eyes?" I ask her looking into her eyes. That when I notice her eyes. There no shine in them. And for some reason I can't see my reflection in them.

"I can't See!" she screams again.

"What could have caused this?" Kaeda asked as she sat across from the doctor. I stood at the door watching as he looked at Kagome.

"Well, one basic cause of blindness are accident on the eyes and back of the head" the doctor said. "You said that Miss. Higurashi fell down the stairs right?" he said looking at Kaeda.

"Yeah she had an accident" she said looking at Kagome.

"I don't think her blindness has anything to do with falling down the stairs." The doctor said looking at the side of Kagomes head.

"There's not enough bruises to say that she fell down the stairs" he said walking behind Kagome. She lifted the back of her hair. "Oh" the doctor said letting go of Kagomes hair and walking to a counter. He grabbed some cotton balls and some kind of liquid.

"Is something the matter?" Kaeda asked walking closer to Kagome.

"We'll find out soon" he said putting the liquid on the cotton ball and rubbing Kagomes head. She closed her eyes in pain. With out thinking I walked closer to her and held her hand.

"Kagome are you sure you fell down the stairs?" the doctor asked. She was quiet for a minute before answering.

"I don't remember" she said looking in front of her "they told me I fell"

"What's the matter?" Kaeda walked over to get a better look at the back of Kagomes head.

"There seems to be some dry blood at the back of her head. That's what I believe cause the blindness" he said throwing the red cotton ball away. "An injury to the back of her head we need to have her take some tests, this injury looks strange"

"Is it permanent?" I asked the doctor and he seems surprise to hear me speaking...

_::::Inuyasha::::_

I walk down the hallway after Sesshoumaru left with Kagome to the hospital. I wonder what he did to her to make her loose her sight. Now I know that what Naraku said was true. Sesshoumaru did hurt her.

Know that Kagome is gone from the hospital how am I going to get her to go with Naraku! I know now that that's the only way to keep her save. Even if Naraku is practically black mailing me to help him, help her.

I walk down the hall into I find Naraku at the guys bathroom. He turns to look at me.

"Well… aren't you early?" he said looking at me with a big smile on his face but when he notice I was alone his smile faded. "Well where is she?" he half screamed half asked me, Walking closer to me.

"She's at the hospital with Sesshoumaru" he looks up. His smile completely gone, He looked mad. "She's blind" at this he walks closer to me. My back is touching the wall and yet he keeps walking no more than a foot away he stops. He grabs my shirt and shakes me.

"What do you mean she's blind?" she scream hitting me against the wall.

"She can't see, I think-"

"Well where is she?" he asked walking away from me "we need her to get her away from Sesshoumaru before she cant hurt her any more"

"She's at the hospital" I tell him walking closer to him.

"Well this makes it easier" he said before walking away with a smile on his face.


	17. Unwanted Sleep

_**-Unwanted Sleep-**_

_**I don't own Inuyasha**_

The doctor gave Kagome some medicine, and said that her sight would go back to normal in less than twenty four hours. I watch as they take her to her room. Since she has to stay here, for an overnight check. They place her in one of the hospitals room.

"Mrs. Kaeda, we need to talk to you about something really important" the doctor said looking over his papers "could you please follow me into my office?" with that he started walking. Kaeda followed behind. When she saw that I wasn't following her, she looked back and whispered for me to follow.

When we arrive to the office, the doctor notices me in the room. He stares at me and sits down. "Please take a sit" we do as he said and sit in front of him.

"Doctor Can you tell us what cause Kagomes blindness?" Kaeda asked as she played with her hands. Not taking her eyes off the doctor.

"First of all who is this gentleman" the doctor said pointing at me with his pen. "What relation does he have with the patient?"

I sit up, clean my throat and introduce my self "Sesshoumaru, Tashio, Kagome Higurashi, Housen doctor, or in other words her partner" I stretch my hand out and he shakes it.

"Nice to meet you" the doctor said as he looked down at his papers and wrote stuff down. "Well before I tell you what wrong with her there is some thing I would like to confirm" he opened a manila folder and gets a paper out.

"What is that?" for some reason Kaeda had to ask.

"Well this is Kagomes hospital record, you see Kagome has been in and out of this hospital for the last three years" he said looking down at his papers. "Let me see, since she entered the hospital she's been here once, because of a...stabbing to her stomach, right? But when she 'falls down the stairs' you don't bring her here?"

"What are you saying doctor?" I ask not sure what he's trying to say, after he makes the air quotes which are very unprofessional and childish.

"Well I need you two to tell me what actually happen to Miss. Higurashi" he said giving us a strange look.

"Are you trying to say that Kagome didn't fall down the stairs?" the doctor nods at Kaedas' question "but that can't be possible! we found her at the bottom of the stairs"

"Well you see we did some test, after we found a very peculiar bruise on her wrist" he said giving me a weird look "we believe that Kagome was physically abused, someone did that to her. We took some x-rays on her skull and there was severe damage, how can I put it. It looked if someone had hit her head against something hard several times"

"But that can't be possible! No one in the hospital would do such a thing!" Kaeda said looking at the doctor than me.

"If I do recall, the person who stabbed Kagome, was a patient at that very same hospital?"

"Yes doctor but the girls had some history together"

"Well is there anyone that you could think of, that would have done this damage to this girl?"

The only person I can't think about is Inuyasha. He's violent, I wouldn't be surprise if he was the one that did it! But I sure as hell would be mad.

"Not really, we removed the girl who stabbed Higurashi, and she stays away from all the other patients, she's sort of a loner"

"Oh well than, there is nothing we can do if we don't know who hurt her" he said once again looking down at his paper. "We need to get a hold of her parents, there is something I have to discuss with them" the doctor said getting up and walking towards the door "Kagome is at room 109D, fourth floor, you may go see her"

With that we left his office. We walked in silence for a couple of minutes until we reached the elevator.

"Sesshoumaru go find Kagome and ask her about what happened to her" she said digging into her purse for her phone "I'm going to try and find her parents" she said walking away from the elevator. Leaving me, alone.

I get into the elevator and think about what the doctor said. Kagome has been in and out of the hospital for the last three years, she's been in the 'hospital' for almost a year. So why was she hurt during the time she wasn't in the hospital?

When I get to the fourth floor I have so many questions, I feel like my head is about to explode. All my questions involve Kagome.

When I kept walking down the hall way I hear screaming, and recognize the voice of the person who was screaming. It was Kagome. He started running to the room where the screams where coming from.

Kagome

"No!" even if I couldn't see, I wasn't going to let them touch me with that! "Let me go!" I screamed as I struggle free from their hold. I wasn't going to give up that easy! I wouldn't let them touch me!

"Relax dear, you're hyperventilating, just relax" He touched my shoulder "Breathe and calm down." He said grabbing my arm. This sounds familiar. I've heard this before! I know I heard this before!!!

"_Besides no one in this place will believe you" he lowered his lips to my neck "because this is nothing but a" he kisses my lips before putting a cloth on top of my mouth and nose "dream" everything goes dark._

Someone got a hold of my arm and the pain came too soon, I got my medicine. I hate shots! I pull my arm away before they were done and that's when I feel it, the cut. For some reason it makes me relax.

"Oh crap!" someone said "get a band-aid or something come on!" they let go of my arm and before I know it am falling. I know falling is a very scary thing. But falling when you can't see anything but white spots is the worst.

"Kagome are you ok?" someone said as I was falling, everything seems to be going in slow motion. _Am I ok? No I'm not ok, because I'm blind, I'm falling, and the pain coming from my arm is making me feel happy,_

Is giving me a happiness I don't want, is making me hear things I don't want to hear. It's making me remember things I want to forget.

"_You know I'll never love anyone the way I love you, right?" Kouga asked as we walked through the park hand in hand._

"_You know that no one will ever take your place" I said smiling up at him "we're going to be together-"_

"_Forever" he said kissing my forehead._

"Kagome are you ok?" Sesshoumaru said as he held me from underneath my armpits stopping me from hitting the ground.

"Yeah" I feel my strength decrease as the medicine takes affect. I'm sleepy, my eyes shut and open.

"Sir, Can you please place the girl on the bed?" someone said. I believe it was one of the doctors. Sesshoumaru picks me up and it makes me feel safe like the very first time he carried me. Like the very fist time he stopped me.

He places me on the bed and someone grabs my arm. The hand feels hot against my skin.

"Well are you guys going to fix what you did to her arm?" Sesshoumaru asked. I can see his outline but that's about It." never mind I'll do it!" he said as someone stands next to him, he growls. Really like a dog. I giggle "you guy can leave I need to talk to her" just like that I hear steps.

"What's so funny Kagome?" he asked as he rubbed something on my cut that made me scream, it burned. I tried to pull my arm away but it was pointless he held it in place. "It's just rubbing alcohol, don't be a baby" he said as he stopped rubbing it on my arm, before blowing on my cut. He laughs, and it makes me feel weird, not a bad weird but a really good weird, and before I know it I'm smiling.

"Kagome the doctor said you didn't fall down the stairs" he said putting a band-aid on my cut. "Why would he say that?"

"I. I don't know?" my eyes are closing on their own. I can't seem to keep them open. "No one will believe you, after all this is only a dream" my eyes shut as unwanted sleep takes over.

"What are you talking about?"

* * *

**_Hey you guys sorry it takes me for ever to update the new chapters...i don't even know where I'm heading with it any more .lol I'm loosing my insperation... but oh well! I'll try to update every weekend _**^_^


	18. Scream!

**::::Scream!::::**

_I don't own Inuyasha_

I don't know what Kagome meant by saying that this was only a dream. It's no the first time she said it, that's why this has me all riled up. Right now she's sleeping. And I can't help but to stare.

There's a knock on the door so I look up. And it's Kaeda. She walks in and sit next to me she's quiet for a minute before she starts talking.

"I thought you quit Sesshoumaru?" she said looking at Kagomes sleeping form. Before looking back up at me.

"I. didn't quit" I look at my hands. I did quit in my mind, but I never told her or anyone else that I wasn't going to go back to work.

"You do know that you hurt her a lot?" She said pointing at Kagome with her phone "the day she came back from the hospital after being stabbed, she changed" she stopped for a second before continuing "she only talked to Inuyasha, she wouldn't even talk during therapy, I though-"she stops when Kagome stirs on her bed. When everything goes quiet again she looks at me.

"I though that we were going to loose her to cutting again"

"Well I'm back, I'm not taking my eyes off her," we sit silent for a while again not saying a word. The only thing that I can hear in Kagome breathing, that's the only thing I can focus on. The only thing I care about. "Not again"

"-parents" I look at Kaeda. She must have been talking for a while now.

"Sorry. What?"

"I called Kagomes parents" she said looking at her phone "the phone was disconnected, so I called one of the emergency numbers and they told me that Kagomes parents moved"

"What do you mean they moved?" what is she talking about? I know that Kagomes parent haven't visit Kagome since the day they dropped her of, but that doesn't mean they abandoned her.

"The Aunt told me that, the Higurashis' left after the death of their daughter, " she stops to look at Kagome "she told me that Kagome Higurashi died, a couple of months after his boyfriends funeral" she said getting a paper out "I don't understand that! Why would they tell people their only daughter died! That's horrible!"

I look at Kagome and wonder what kind of life she had before she came here. What kind of life she had before we met. Was she a happy girl? Did her parent love her? Those questions fly through my mind as I watch her sleep.

"Kagome doesn't have anyone in the world anymore, they left her like an unwanted dog! Like an animal!" she starts crying and screaming "they didn't even think twice!" I get up and grab Kaeda wrist and pull her out of the room. Kagome needs her rest and I'm not going to let her ruin it.

"Kaeda go check the hospital, I'll stay with Kagome" she wipes her tears and walks away "Kaeda?" she turns to look at me "she has me, I'll be her world" with that her tears start pouring and she turns around and walk away. "And I'll have her and she'll be my world" I whisper as I walk back into the room.

Kagome is still sleeping. I grab the chair and drag it next to her bed and sit down. I grab her hand and lay my head on her bed. I close my eyes.

I wonder many things about this girl. I wonder what she would do if I told her how I felt about her. But I refuse to tell her. Because I know for a fact that this can hurt her more than help her. After all, telling Rin my feelings was what made her so unsteady.

Kagome

I don't know what time it is, all that I know is that I'm hungry! I can hear my stomach talking to me and is kind of scary!

I open my eyes slowly and stretch my arms out. The first things I see are two blurry arms in front of me which is a good sign. I really don't understand how my sight got back so soon, but I guess that's not my problem.

I rub my right arm and feel something bumpy on it. I move my arm closer to my face until I see a little band-aid. I grab the corner of it and hold it for a minute before removing it.

I move my finger tips back and forth on top of the cut. Oh how I wish I could go back to normal. If I could have one wish, I would have wished for Kouga to be alive. To be here with me, for him to protect me like he just to.

I want to scratch my arm I want to feel the joy of cutting again. I put the band aid back on and try to sit up. But something is squishing my stomach. I look down and what I see at first scares me. Because everything is blurry. The only thing I can see is silver.

I move my hand down to my stomach until I touch some silky strands of hair.

"Inuyasha, wake up?" I said as I searched for his shoulders.

"Come on Inuyasha, I need some food!" I said shaking him this time. He moves and I stop. But than he stops and wraps his arms around my waist "Inuyasha!" I move him again. "Come on! I'm hungry!"

His head snaps up and he stares at me. "Kagome are you ok?" I freeze that's not Inuyashas, vice. That's not Inuyashas, blurry face. That's not Inuyashas, warm hands on my face. Those are Sesshoumarus hot hands on my forehead. That's Sesshoumaru.

"Why are you still here?" I ask him before I can stop my self. I wish I could have seen the look on his face more clearly, because what I saw was kind of scary. It reminded me of a painting I once saw, of the bold person screaming with his hands to his face.

"I'm making sure you're ok" he said grabbing my hands "so, are you ok?" I nod and my stomach speaks. At this Sesshoumaru laughs. The first time I ear him laugh like that, he seems so happy "Come on let go to the cafeteria" he takes my blankets off and pulls me so I'm sitting on the bed with my feet dangling.

He gets up and walks away from me. Before coming back and kneeling in front of me. He takes my left foot and puts soft hospital sleeper on. He takes the right one and does the same. For some reason I feel like Cinderella. I feel so happy right now it's hard to describe.

We walk down the hallway hand in hand. It makes my stomach feel funny but I don't say anything and try to push it aside.

"Wait here I'll go get the food ok?" I nod and he walks away from me. As soon as he left I got the strangest feeling on the bottom of my stomach... As if something horrible was about to happen but when nothing happens and Sesshoumaru sits in front of me I relax.

"Here!" he said putting a tray of food in front of me. "I didn't know what you liked so I got you a vegetable soup" he said giving me the spork. "It has lots of carrots!" he said as I was about to put the spoon full of soup in my mouth. I giggle.

"Why are you doing this?"

"Well the doctor said I had to feed you lots of carrots! So I got you vegetable soup with lots of carrots, carrot cake, and baby carrots" he said as if was the most obvious thing in the world.

I sit across from him and we eat in silence.

"Kagome can we play ten questions in ten seconds?" he asked out of nowhere. I stare at him and try to focus.

"If we do are you going to analyze me?" I ask taking a bite of my carrot.

"It depends on the answer" he just sits there he doesn't move. But than out of nowhere his hand takes my carrot and he bites it.

"Hey! I'm the one that needs Carrots!" I said placing my hand palms up, he laughs and places the carrot on my hand "ok, what do you want to know?" I said finishing my carrot.

"Tell me where your parents caring?" I don't even have time to think. I clear my mind and answer every question he asks with out thinking.

"Yup, they were the best parent in the world!"

"Did they ever hurt you?"

"No! They loved me"

"Have you cut yourself?"

"No!"

"I'm sorry Kagome, I'll slow down so you can have time to concentrate ok?" I nod and he continues.

"Has anyone hurt you since you got to the hospital?"

"Umm" I stop and think, do I really don't want to be a snitch. I look up and Sesshoumaru, he's so close to my face I can see him clearly and I can feel his breath on my lips.

"Please be honest, this is important"

"Yes, Ayame hurt me. After all she did stab me" I said looking away.

"I know what Ayame did to you. But what I want to know is if anyone else beside Ayame has hurt you? Anyone"

"Kikyou, she's the only reason I was transfer to the Hausen, I didn't cut-"

"Kagome? What are you doing here?" I turn around as soon as I hear Inuyashas' voice. Before I know it I'm smiling at him. But than I hear Sesshoumaru moving around and turn to face him. Sesshoumaru is getting up.

"Hi Inuyasha!-" I said turning to see him.

"She needed food" Sesshoumaru said as he got up.

"Sesshoumaru, I need to talk to you" Inuyasha said as he walked away from the table.

"Wait here" he said as he followed Inuyasha out of the cafeteria.

I grab a carrot and take a bite off it. And that's when I feel someone staring at me. I lift my head and look around the room but it's useless. Everything is blurry. I hear the people talking around me. I look down at the table and wait for Sesshoumaru.

I feel someone hand on my left shoulder and tense up. The hand stays in place. "Hello! Dear. We need to take you back to your room" the man said, in a voice very familiar to the one in my nightmares. "We need to go now" he said grabbing me by the shoulders and pulling me up.

"But I can't go" I say as he turned me around and pushed me to a different direction than the way I came from "I have to wait for Sesshoumaru" I said shaking my shoulders free.

"He's not coming back" he grabs my shoulders again and pushes me. I try to shake him again but his hands squish my shoulders tighter "Relax dear, there's no reason to be rude" I freeze.

"_See there's no reason to be rude" he said as he began stroking my hair. "__"__Your hair…it's so long and shiny. How do you get it like that?" he asked lifting a strand up to his nose and sniffing it. "And your eyes! You are the most beautiful girl I've ever seen"_

_He let my hair fall and moved on to my face. I felt so light headed; I didn't even bother to slap his hand away. My eyes feel heavy._

_He started rubbing my cheek. "Your skin is so flawless and soft" he said as he moves his fingers to my lips. "I wonder" he said moving his face closer to mine.__He leaned down and kissed me on the lips, holding onto my face with one strong hand._

"_Just as I though!" he said rubbing my cheek again "delicious and soft" I try to push my self up again but he wouldn't let me. He slammed my head against the tile floor_

We get on the elevator and instead of going up we go down. My breathing gets faster. This man makes me uncomfortable. I don't even remember how I got in here! Everything's a blur. When the elevators doors open he grabs my hand and starts dragging me. Everything is white, it hurt my eyes so I close them.

"Where are we going?" I say stopping, not moving an inch.

"We're going home! That's where!" he's dragging me again, that's when I feel the wind on my face. We're outside. We're not in the hospital anymore.

I stop again.

"But I thought we where going to my room?" I ask backing away from him.

"Well I guess you though wrong!" he's so happy, it scares me! "Where are you going?" he said walking closer to me and wrapping his arms around my waist.

"I didn't. I didn't say bye" I say trying to get free from his hold.

That's when I see him, when I get a good look at him, only because of the closeness. I see his maroon eyes, his dark black hair and his sinister smile. I can feel my eyes open wide as well as my mouth.

Scream!

"Well I can see you're happy to see me" I can't move I'm frozen with fear. Before I know it his lips are on top of mine. It wasn't a dream! It wasn't a night mare! It was real life! This man had touched me! He had hurt me! He was the reason why I was here.

Scream! I want to scream but I can't! I can't do anything. I'm so scared! im frozen. I know tis is'nt a dream. So why doesn't anyone stop him!?!


	19. Wedding

I dont Own Inuyasha....

::::Wedding::::

"Well I can see you're happy to see me" I can't move I'm frozen with fear. Before I know it his lips are on top of mine. It wasn't a dream! It wasn't a night mare! It was real life! This man had touched me! He had hurt me! He was the reason why I was here.

Scream! I want to scream but I can't! I can't do anything. I'm so scared! I can't do anything. Why doesn't anyone stop him!

"We are going to be so happy together!" he said as he pulled me to the parking lot. Stop him! I want to scream cant you see what his doing! Stop him!

I open my mouth to speak but he beats me to it. "You're going to be so happy! We're going to have so much fun!" he said holding me closer to his body.

"Help!" I scream. And scream, and scream but nothing happens! No one saves me. No one stops him.

I look back into the cafeteria. And that's when I first notice it. Kagome is not there! I run in and search the table. All her food there. Everything is how it should be. Except, for the fact that Kagome is gone. And there's an invitation on the table.

_Not invited._

A wedding invitation. I read the names on the card. And when I do,I freeze. Kagome Higurashi and Naraku Isharugi. I drop the invitation and run to her room.

Empty! The room is empty! She gone! I walk over to the window and look out. I see Inuyasha walking to a truck. Where is he going?

"_You're not going to hurt her again!" Inuyasha screamed as he pushed Sesshoumaru against the wall "Kagome is never going to be hurt by you ever again!"_

What did he meant by that? I never hurt Kagome. I never did anything that could have caused her any harm! I wish I could have made every minute, she was with me the happiest minutes of her life.

He watched as his brother open the door to the truck. A pair of pink slippers got his attention. There was someone in the truck with the same slippers as Kagome! He got out and ran down the stairs afraid that the elevator would be too slow.

But when he finally made it to the parking lot it was too late. The truck was gone with the girl who needed him most. He didn't know what to do! He had witness a kidnapping! One of his patients was kidnapped by…

He looks down at the invitation he held in between his index finger and thumb…His patient Kagome was kidnapped by Naraku Isharugi.

Naraku Isharugi? Why did this name sound so familiar to him? Sure Naraku was a common name…but Isharugi? Where had he heard that name before, was it in the hospital. Wasn't there a patient by that name?

I run back into the hospital and go up to the front desk. I get the phone and call the police.

In a wedding dress I see

All the months that I spend here

In a wedding dress I eat

Only scraps, that he feeds me

In a wedding dress I talk

To the man who screwed my life

In a wedding dress I move

All around a dark filled room

In a wedding dress I cry

On every sleepless night

In a wedding dress I shrink

While my stomach starts to sink

In a wedding dress I walk

Trough the woods, that hide his house

In a wedding dress I run.

From the man who loves me most.

In a wedding dress I bleed

As the skin pills off my feet

In a wedding dress I freeze,

As the snow touches my skin

In a wedding dress will I die?

My body lying on the ground?

Where's my angle?

Where's the light?

Where's the happiness I had?

I walk through the streets. I don't know where I am. I don't know where I'm going. The night is silent and the only thing I can hear are my steps as the snow sinks beneath my feet. My face hurts and I can't feel my toes.

I try to remember where I'm going, but how can I remember that when I don't even know my name when I don't even know who I am. I look down ay my bare feet as I walk. I can see the snow go between my toes. And with every step the snow turns red.

The dress I'm wearing isn't while any more. The dirt has stained it and the blood from my face is making weird drops on the front. The bottom is wet with snow, dirt, and blood. When will the blood stop? Why won't it freeze before the blood drips.

I close my eyes and every time I do. I see a smile. A smile I don't want to see ever again. I keep on walking. The street is deserted. I walk alone thought the streets my feet seem to have a mind of their own as they lead me somewhere.

I sniffed and covered the lower half of my face with a cold hand, the skin of which providing a chill almost as cold as the air around Me." its winter" I tell my self as I walk. I love winter. Something about the way the snow looks, it reminds me of an angel.

My fingers are numb. My hands are numb. Everything's numb yet I can move. I walk none stop. Find him! You have to find him in order to survive! But where is he? Why didn't he save me from the sinister man! From the crazy man that said he loved me.

Walk! I tell myself and my feet move. But after a while my blood runs cold. My energy is gone. And I can feel my end is coming. I sit on the snow covered ground and close my eyes.

Even with my eyes shut I can see. The light's coming towards me. Heaven? Is that the light from heaven? I open my eyes to get a better look. No that's not the light from heaven! It's the light from hell! It's red! Hell is coming. I'm dying and going to hell because of what happen to the sinister man.

Blue? Why does the hell light turn blue? It's blinking! The light switches from red to blue. I'm so confuse I don't move. Maybe I can blend into the snow. I close my eyes and wait for the lights to fade. To forget about me!

I feel a hand on my shoulder and with out opening my eyes I start to scream! I can't stop screaming!

"Miss, is you ok?" the voice said. "Im officer Yratne" he said still holding my shoulder. "Do you need help? Are you lost?"

Now I can talk nor scream I stay silent as I let the man put me into his car.

"I'll take you the station than we'll see what to do about _you_" he said as he starts the car and drives.

* * *

I lost all my insperation!!!

sorry for the borring chater!!! :(


	20. Mrs Tashio

::::Mrs. Tashio::::

_I don't own Inuyasha_

The ride to the station is slow and I can't help but to relax as the morning sun starts peaking through the car window. The heat coming from the heater makes my eyes shut and open as I fight against sleep. I don't talk and neither does he.

I watch as the trees go by, and can't help but to wonder how far I was taken. The last time I was out of the house was in the summer I believe. But my memories are blurry as if my memories were written with an erasable marker and than erased.

I look down at my lap and think, if my memories from my past could be forgotten, could that mean that what I went through with the man will be erased from my memories too.

Will I be like a blank chalkboard, ready for new memories? And if that happends will I still exist? Will people know me, when I don't know them? My thoughts don't make sense but I keep asking them.

Like what will happen if the man didn't die? What will happen if he finds me? If he finds his so called 'wife'? Will I go back into the darkness of his house? Will he… will he be mad? If so does severe pain awaits for me? Stop! I have to think of something else…

I close my eyes and rest my head against the window. I look down, and see 'my dress' just looking at it makes me want to scream! I can feel him on me! But that's probably because there's his blood. I touch the front of the dress and there, and there. Most of the blood in the front belongs to the man. What will happen if he finds me?-

"Miss?" I open my eyes when I hear a woman speaking to me. I stare at her not sure where I am at the time. The room is white. Four white brick walls.

"Come with me, we need to get you clean up" she said pulling me away from a warm soft bed. I had fallen a sleep and hadn't even noticed. I lift my dress so is not dragging behind me, and follow her out the door.

The woman in front of me is so beautiful and young. She looks like she could be a model. I can't take my eyes off her. She turns around and looks at me straight in the eyes.

"Just making sure you're following" she smiled.

Her eyes seem so familiar. I can tell she's not wearing any makeup but she doesn't need it her skin glows… her hair is the strangest color. Silver, but for some reason it makes me feel safe around her.

I follow her without saying a word. But when we walk by other officers the voices around me begin. But their not in my head, they're around me.

"That's the girl they found on the high way" someone said

"Yeah apparently they found her walking bare foot" another going the conversation.

"Is she crazy?"

"Not sure yet" someone said laughing.

I follow her through a hall way. The men, who are looking at me, are all dressed in blue. And all I can hear is their whispers, and feel their eyes as they follow me until I turn the corner…

We walk into a blue bathroom and stare at each other for a long time. Until she hands me a bar of soap and some shampoo. I look at it and see the price tag, two dollars twenty-nine cents. I open it, close my eyes and smell it coconut.

When I open my eyes the woman is staring at me. She's smiling. I turn around and walk into the shower room. The woman stays behind. Not saying a word.

I take my dress off and take a shower. The lady waits for me to be done. I wrap my self in a towel and walk back to see the woman still sitting where I left her. She smiles and hands me a police sweater, a pair of sweat pants, a tank to and a pair of socks

"Don't put the socks on yet" she said handing them to me "we need to clean you feet" with that I walk into one of the stalls and change the lady smiles at me. I sit next to her with the sweater on my lap.

She looks at my wrists and smiles, a sad smile. She stands up and with out asking starts brushing my hair. I count every time the brush touches my hair. Forty times, and she's done.

She sits in front of me and grabs my feet. She stares at them for a minute before she starts cleaning them. With out taking her eyes off me she starts speaking.

"Yratne, the officer who found you, he said you where severely injured" she said getting a cotton ball and cleaning all the cuts on my feet. "He said that your face was bleeding" she looks up at me "but there's not a single cut on your face"

_Well_ I want to say _that's because that wasn't my blood_. But I keep my mouth shut. There's no need for me to speak to her. She gives me a questioning look before looking back at my feet.

"Anyway" she said letting my feet go "since I'm the only female officer," she said letting go of my feet and looking at me "the others thought it would be a good idea, that I take care of you until we find out what happed to-" she turns to her left.

"Mrs. Tashio, you're son on line one" a man with a mustache said, before walking out of the door.

"My son is leaving with me right now but he's not going to be any trouble" she said looking at me as she gets up "he keeps to himself" the expression on her faces changes she looks sad. How old is her son? If I had to guess by looking at her I would say six or seven.

"Finish getting ready and we'll leave in a couple of minutes" with that she's gone. I'm left alone to do nothing. There's nothing for me to do I'm ready I believe.

Tashio, why does that word sound so familiar?


	21. Alcohol

**::::Alcohol::::**

_I don't own Inuyasha_

I sit alone in the room waiting for the woman to comeback. Which she does after a couple of minutes, she looks worried and tells me to follow her. So I do what I'm told. I follow behind her as we make it across the rooms.

I keep my head down when we walk by the officers again. They're not making fun of me anymore. There not talking. They are just staring. They are giving me the kind of stare that make me wonder what there looking at.

As I walk my head bend lower and lower. Their eyes are filled with lust. I know this because that's the kind of stares the sinister man would give me. I feel naked in front of this men.

We walk out to the parking lot and get into a black car and that's when she starts talking again. She smiles a sad smile. She turns the car on, and puts it in reverse.

"I feel so stupid" she said stopping and putting the car on drive "I didn't even ask your name" she drives down the road. Not taking her eyes of the road. When I don't answer her she speaks.

"Well my name is Yuzuki, Tashio" she said touching her left eye as if to wipe a tear away "you can call me Yuzuki" I don't say anything so she just keeps on driving. She's quiet until something makes her head snaps up. At first I thought that there was something was wrong, until I saw the smile on her face.

"You know" she said trying to break the silence in the car "when I was little my grandfather just to tell me stories about my ancestors, and how my name was very important"

she said turning to look at me before flashing me a very happy smile "he always told me that I needed to be gentle because that was part of what my name meant and that where ever I went, I had to demand superiority" it seem that she was going back in time to remember something far away. As if she was looking for century worth memories.

I didn't want to be rude but I wanted to cover my ears so bad! Why should I care about this!!! Come on! Even if she was taking me in for gods knows how long, it doesn't mean I have to be taught about her name! Let along her past!

I don't know why but her remembering stuff makes me mad! She's older than me and she can remember who knows how far! And the only thing I can remember is the officer finding me on the side of the road!

"-But the part that I liked most about the name they gave me, was that more that half of me was supposed to belong to the moon" _Come on!_

"well, since you don't have a name" she said looking at me from the corner of her eye "is it ok if I call you-" her phone starts ringing. _Thank you god!_ She looks up at me and smiles she's so nervous for some reason.

"Hello?" she said looking straight at the road. I can hear a male's voice on the other side of the phone.

"I'm on my way-" she stops for a second.

"No! Just put the bottle down I'll be there in less than five minutes" she hangs up and drives faster. The car is silent for less than five minutes until we pull in her drive way. She tell me to wait in the car, again I do what I'm told.

The windows are up and I can hear the woman screaming at someone. Before I know it my arms are up on my ears trying to block the screams. When I do, I don't hear her screams anymore. I hear the sinister mans screams.

I notice I haven't thought about his name for a while know and just like that his name pops in my head.

Naraku

"_Shut up! I will not touch my dear!" he screamed his so called happy scream. "I will not touch you in any sexual way silly!" happiness pours out his mouth like a rainbow of skittles._

"_No I will wait until you're ready! And than we'll have some children, too show the world how much we love each other!"_

"_Come on…..get down from there!" happiness "if you do jump you're just going to hurt your neck! You know I won't let you die! I love you"_

Knock, knock.

I look to my left to see outside my window. She smiles. She's looking at me. My hands for some reason are around my neck. I remove them and place them on my lap.

"Come on!" she said as she opens my door "I'm not calling you 'girl' the whole time you live with me!" she said smiling "what would you like to be called?"

I shrug, she smiles.

"Aki! I'm going to call you Aki! Is that ok with you?" yup is ok with me if you think I'm like your little dog that you can pick a name for! Why am I so mad?!? I don't think I ever been this mad before! So why now!

"It means sparkle! Because your eyes sparkle a whole lot!" _whatever!_

We walk into the house and the stank of alcohol fills the room. She smiles when she notices I'm sniffing the air. She walks over to the living room and I follow her.

Glass. There's glass in the corner of the room. A bottle I suppose. She walks over and starts picking up the glass I just stare at her.

"Are you hungry?" she asked out of nowhere. She gets up and this time I'm sure she wiped a tear off her face.

"Yeah" I whisper. Her sadness makes me feel more comfortable. She walks over to the kitchen and turns the stove on. Her sadness makes my anger banish completely.

"What do you want to eat?" I shrug and she walks over to the cabinets. "Do you like tomato soup?" again I shrug and she opens the can and pours it on a pan.

Ten minutes later we are eating tomato soup and grill cheese sandwiches.

"Yuzuki!!" someone screams and I hear foot steps. She off her chair starts running down the hall somewhere.

"Stop it!" she screams, she's not mad she's sad "why do you have to do this! Please just go sleep it off!"

"Shut up! Officer!" someone said with laughter in his voice. He's mocking her. "Well didn't you say we're having a guest over?" the foot steps get lauder.

"Sesshoumaru! Stop!" she scream before she started whispering "we couldn't find her ok, I wasn't your fault!" the footsteps start to fade away, "stop wasting your life on alcohol!" until there gone. All that I can hear is two people sobbing.

Is her son an alcoholic? I look around while shes gone. Empty bottles. I read the names of the battles as I wait fro her to come back. Vodka, whiskey, tequila, some beer cans.

"come on I'll show you your new room"

Yuzuki show me my room. She told me it belonged to her younger son. There's sadness in her eyes. She hands me a pair of basketball shorts and a black tank top.

"Here you can sleep in this" she said as she walked out of the room. She didn't lock the door. Which I think is weird. Naraku never left the door unlocked.

I change into the clothes and sit on the bed. What am I supposed to do? I get up and walk around the room. There's nothing to do! I walk over to a dresser and open one of the doors. Empty. I open another one empty…soon I check the closet and anything where you could put clothing or just some crap, but everything empty.

I go back to the bed and lay down. I close my eyes and try to go to sleep but the voice form the man that screamed earlier fills my head, I can hear his voice. But he's saying something else something I heard before. Something important...

"K….. This is my last question, and probably the hardest one I'll asked you so far tell me why did you start cutting, how did this began?"

I close my eyes and try to forget about it. I try to sleep.

I open my eyes when I hear someone screaming. I sit on the bed and look around the room. I don't know where I am. But it's dark. At first I think I'm back with Naraku but when my eyes adjust to the light I know I'm somewhere else.

I open my door and walk into the kitchen. Empty. The house seems empty yet I can hear screams coming from down the hallway.

I'm about to walk out of the kitchen when I see a piece of paper on the fridge. It's a note from Yuzuki. Not knowing if it belongs to me I get close to the fridge and read it.

_**I had an emergency at the station. There's food on the fridge. I'll be back as soon as possible.**_

_**Yuzuki**_

I can still hear the screams coming from down the hallway with out thinking I follow them. Until I'm standing in front of a wood door. I knock but nothing happened the screams only get louder.

_Get away!_ My head is telling me to get away! To go to 'my room' and lock the door, But my hand opens the door. The room is full of darkness. As I walk into the room the darkness increases.

I reach the bed as the screams get louder. What was his name? What did Yazuki called him. I reach out until my hand's on top of the covers before I say his name.

"Sesshoumaru?" Sweat dripped from my forehead. Why did that name feel so natural coming out her mouth? Why did my heart beat faster? Was I that scare?


	22. Not of Importance

This review got my attention (big time) so I decided to do this chapter. I hope this answers all of the questions any of you might have **^.^**

**SheWhoDreamsofSilverAndGold-**I'll be honest. These past couple of chapters have confused me. I wish you could cleear it up a bit. Sesshomaru? An alcoholic? Is it because they couldn't find Kagome? But she's there...right? How long has she been gone? What happened to Inuyasha? 0.0' I am either confused or just plain stupid. Probably both but I still don't know exactly what's going on. Other that those few things you're doing great. I want some sess/kag interaction in the next one if you don't mind. It seems that the tables have turned. Now sess is an alcoholic so maybe Kagome will have to heal him...? Anywho, great job. Keep doing what you do.

_**

* * *

**_

**_:::: Not of Importance::::_**

_I don't own Inuyasha_

"Sesshoumaru?" Sweat dripped from my forehead. Why did that name feel so natural coming out of my mouth? Why did my heart beat faster? Was I that frightened by this man?

"_She's gone Kaeda! She's gone!" I screamed into the phone. The girl I was supposed to be protecting was gone! I knew something like this was going too happened and I didn't do anything to stop it. I told my self I wasn't going to leave her side and I did! And now she was gone, and it was my entire fault!_

"_Sesshoumaru calm down!" I hear Kaeda on the other side of the phone. "Please you have composed your self" I take deep breaths and try to slow my breathing down. "Who's gone?" Kaeda's voice fills up my head._

"_Kagome! Kagome's gone!" I scream into the phone. I don't care about the people who are giving me weird looks for screaming in the hospital. "Someone took her! She's gone!" the hospital guards walk over to me._

"_Sir we need you follow us" a tall pale man said as he got a hold of my arm. While his partner follow behind. "We can't have you screaming in the lobby"_

"_No we can't" the very tan man said practically pushing me. I stop. I will not let this man drag me out. Who do they think they are?_

"_You can't have me screaming in the lobby?!!" I scream as loud as I can. "Well maybe if you did your job how it's supposed to be done! I wouldn't be screaming!" I scream as I shake my arm away from the guards' hands._

"_Maybe if you took better care of the exits! my girl, wouldn't have been kidnapped! Maybe she would have, still been here! And I wouldn't be screaming!" why do I even waste my time with these man! The more I'm here the further away Kagome is._

_Just than the main door of the hospital open. The police are here. The hospital guards walk over to the officers and demand them to arrest me. The anger inside of me is threatening to break through. I need to punch something! I need to hurt someone._

"_Sesshoumaru?" I look to my left. My mother's standing no more than two feet away from me. My dear mother, who just the sight of her makes my anger amplify twice as much. My mother, who couldn't even wait for my fathers' body to be underground before, she got pregnant with someone else's child. _

_My sweet old, mother._

"_Yuzuki" I said with no emotion but hate in my voice. This woman I despise. This woman, this woman is not my mother in my eyes._

"_Are you ok, Sesshoumaru? Why didn't you call me back? I called you almost two months ago I was so worried!" she said wrapping her arms around my waist. I don't move an inch. I stay still, like a sculpture waiting for her to be done with her show of affection._

"_Officer, I would appreciate it, if you do your job and start looking for Kagome" I tell her when her hug continues. I step away from her. And walk over to the other officers. Yuzuki stays behind with a hurt expression on her face._

"_How long ago was she was taken away?" a very large man asked._

"_About an hour" I say, as I take a sit on one of the hospital chairs._

"_Would you say this man is dangerous? This... Naraku you spoke of?" he asked. Why is he asking so many questions? Why can't they just go and look for her! Don't they know that Naraku can hurt her? _

"_Yes! His dangerous! I believe he has hurt her before! Just go find her!" I scream getting up from my chair and walking over to the window._

"_Ok" he said, after an hour and thirty five minutes of his questions "what does Kigome Higurashi looks like?"_

"_Ka-go-me!" I scream. And think about her, she was beautiful. She was the most beautiful girl I had ever seen. "I think she's about five foot four, she's skinny, black hair below the shoulders, blue eyes, and ivory skin, lighter than mine" I tell him looking at my hand._

"_Any marks or scars that will help us identify her?" he said writing everything down._

"_She has a- a scar, on the left side of her stomach and she also has some scaring on her wrists" I tell them looking out the window "she has a small birthmark below her right eye, like a black dot, it kind of looks like a star"_

"_Anything else we should know? Before we leave?" I think about it. And think back to Inuyasha. He's helping Naraku! He got in the car. The only reason he wanted to talk to me was because he wanted me to leave Kagome alone._

"_My brother" I said looking at 'my mother' "Inuyasha Tashio, is with them… He's helping Naraku"_

* * *

_**Ring. Ring. Ring.**_

_I jump off my bed and walk over to my phone. "Hello?" I wait for someone to speak. I'm always waiting. It's been two months of waiting for the call that will tell me that they found her, but it never comes. I'm not even sure if it's going to come anymore._

"_Sesshoumaru?" there's sobbing on the other side of the phone "we found your brother on the side of the road. He's badly injured and I don't think he's going to make it" it's Yuzuki. With out saying a word I hang up, get dressed before running to the hospital. A few blocks away from the hotel I'm staying at._

_I run none stop. Twenty blocks until I reach the hospital. My legs start to burn, but I don't care. I let the pain of my legs wash over me. I let the pain of my legs consume me as my muscles burn underneath my flesh._

_I need to ask him about Kagome. I; need to know where she is?_

"_No running in the hospital please!" a nurse screams but I ignore her. I run until I reach the front desk. A young nurse smiles at me. But the only thing I can do is glare._

"_I need Inuyasha Tashios' room number" she looking in the computer her smile frozen on her lips. _

_Until, it fades._

"_Sorry Sir But Mr. Tashio is in the intense care unit. You can't go there" she said, but I started walking there anyway. "Sir! You can't go in there!" And just like that I was through the door._

_I looked in every room until I found Inuyasha, or what's supposed to be Inuyasha. I walked in to see 'my mother' sitting in a chair a couple of feet from the bed. She looked as up me with tears in her eyes._

"_They had to put him to sleep" she whispered. "He-He was in so much pain" I look at him. His face is badly bruised. There's not a single spot that's not green, blue or purple. His left eye is black from his eyebrow to his cheek bone. _

"_The doctors think his paralyzed, he needs surgery if he wants to walk again, he will also need plastic surgery" she said before she started sobbing "that's, only if he makes it"_

_I leave the hospital. Where are you Kagome?_

_It's been more than three months already and they found Inuyasha but they haven't found Kagome yet. I don't know what I'm going to do if they don't find her. I feel as if my world has turned upside down. I feel as if I need some therapy to survive. My life is becoming a living hell. I don't know why I feel this way but I need Kagome. I know, I need her to survive. _

_I'd lost my only one. My eyes filled to the rim before the tears finally began to flow. Who would I be leaving behind? Kagome was gone. Who would I be abandoning? Nobody, at least no one I cared about. _

_I try cutting, already. But I was only able to make one cut. I couldn't do that. I was the one that was making her stop, what gave me the right to cut my skin. I was being a hypocrite. _

_Beside what if they found her, who would be there for her. When I was the only one who truly care for her._

_I quit my job a couple of months ago and moved back to my house out in the country. All by myself. I was depressed. I lay in my bed for hours next to the phone waiting for the call that would lift my emotional state, but it never came. After a while I laid in bed with a bottle of tequila, waiting for the call. And soon I couldn't wait awake any longer so I slept or passed out waiting for the call._

_I knew that drinking and drugs were bad for me, but could I stop? No. I had to find a way to forget about Kagome. But that didn't happen when ever I drank alcohol her face would pop-up and my brain would fill up with the memories we shared together. _

_Once I started drinking, my whole life revolved around it. I needed the alcohol to be with her. I just sat on the floor with my back against the wall talking to her. I opened the bottle and chugged half of it down, every time she seemed more real._

_Inuyasha was in a self induce comma. Kagome was, god knows where. And my so called 'mother' was in the police station working on every case that came her way except for Kagome forgotten file. She didn't care about some seventeen year old girl that had gone missing more than seven months. They all said she was long dead. _

_Not of importance._

* * *

_Why was it that every time I felt close to someone, that person was taken away from me. I had always assumed that I would be alone until I fell in love with Rin. Actually she was my first love. And what happened? In a blink of an eye she was gone, she was dead. And now, when I had allowed my heart to love again, she was taken away. _

_I took another swig of the sweet tequila. Before throwing it at the wall. The bottle shattered into a thousand little pieces as it dropped into a pile of glass. I don't know how many bottles I've drank this month, and I don't remember the last time I was sober._

_I hear someone knocking on the door. But I ignore it. I don't care who it is, if it's not Kagome. I open another bottle. Of what? I don't know. The only thing I know is that it smells strong._

"_Sesshoumaru?" I hear a woman's voice and I ignore it. She won't find me in this dark room. The door opens and light shines through the crack of the door, blinding me._

_"Sesshoumaru!" Yuzuki cried, rushing over to me. "What are you doing? Oh, look at all these bottles, what's this?" she picked up the old roll and held it up to her face. "Marijuana? What's wrong with you?!" I tryied it only once. my head reeled at her whining. "Good god, what am I going to do with you? You're only twenty three years old!"_

_I say nothing. I groaned at her yelling and motioned for her to leave. But she stays put. Get out! I want to scream. She doesn't deserve to see me like this! She deserves hell, for not looking for her._

"_You have to stop doing this to yourself, Sesshoumaru!" she screamed getting my bottle out of my hand "You'll end up sick or worst! How am I supposed to live without you?"_

"_How am I supposed to live with out Kagome!" I scream making my head hurt. "I know you can live with out me! Because you already did!" just go away please!_

"_Please Sesshoumaru! You need help-" I let her voice fade into the background and take another bottle and another swig. I actually think that drugs are harmful, but they're just a way of life, for me now. _

_A way to be with Kagome. _

_Seeing me drinking, Yuzuki swiped the bottle away walked into my bathroom and dumped its contents into the sink, before walking back out of the bathroom with tears in her eyes._

_She walked out of my room and into the kitchen. After a while she was in front of me Her feet paced annoyingly back and forth across the tile floor, making it hard to stay quiet. _

_Suddenly, in my hand was a cup of something that smelled sick. Eggs, was the only word I could describe what I smelled. Instead of asking, like I should've in the first place. I just took a swig. Like before, the world turned into a hangover place and before I knew it, I was puking like a baby, before the darkness consumed me._

_I woke up to the morning radio station in a deep daze, my head pounding and feeling like it was about to split open. I sat up on the bed. And looked to my left, Yuzuki was sitting on a chair looking at me._

"_You're staying here" she said "your not going to drink, and you're going to try to get better" she said looking into my eyes._

"_No! You are driving me back to my house! You're going to go see Inuyasha" I said getting off the bed. "And you're going to forget that I'm your son"_

"_I'm afraid that's not going to work!" Yuzuki said standing up. And walking over to the door and closing it "you're either staying here or you can just live at the Housen" she screams with tears in her eyes "I'll put you in there!" she screams._

"_You wouldn't!"_

"_If it will save your life, I'll do it. I'll do anything!"_

_I've been leaving with my 'mom' for the past two months they haven't found Kagome yet. It's been almost a year since I last saw her. I didn't stop drinking nor will I. This is, as I said before the only way I can see her. Every time Yuzuki goes to the station I drink as much as possible. And today was no different._

_I sit on the living room, drinking my beers, and tequila. I'm sure this is going to leave a big mess on Yusuki's new rug. But I really don't care. Maybe that way she'll realize that I'm better off on my own. I look at the phone at the table. I grab it and dial a number. The first number that comes to mind, Yuzuki_

"_Hello?" she said and even if couldn't see her I knew she was smiling. I smile too because I know that her smile is going to turn into a frown._

"_Hello 'mother', I'm just calling to say that I'm looking for a lighter" I stop to see if she'll say something. She doesn't so I continue "I'm cooking something good!" again she doesn't say anything. Until_

"_I'm on my way-"_

"_Is there someone with you in the car?" I asked because she's' being so quiet "Because that's not such a good idea. My guest Captain Morgan doesn't like visitor, he thinks I might embarrass you" _

"_No! Just put the bottle down I'll be there in less than five minutes"_

"_Ok" I say laughing as I throw the bottle against the wall._

"Sesshoumaru?" I feel something on the top of my covers and with out thinking I grab a wrist and flip her over. I know it's a girl from the sound of her squealing as my body pins her against my bed. I think about it for a minute. What's the day today? It's Friday. Yuzuki is working today all day, and Helga our house keeper doesn't work until Monday.

My left hand is holding her right, and with my left hand I snap my finger and the lights on my room turn on. Her face is hidden, behind her strands of hair. With my free hand I remove some of the hairs from her face. Her eyes are shut before they open wide. In fear.

Blue eyes...


	23. Stay Away

**::::Stay Away::::**

I don't own Inuyasha

"Sesshoumaru?"

I feel something on the top of my covers and with out thinking I grab a wrist and flip her over. I know it's a girl from the sound of her squealing as my body pins her against my bed. I think about it for a minute. What's the day today? It's Friday. Yuzuki is working all day, and Helga our house keeper doesn't work until Monday.

My left hand is holding her right. I snap my finger and the lights on my room turn on. Her face is hidden, behind her strands of black hair. With my free hand I remove some of the hairs from her face. Her eyes are shut before they open wide.

Blue eyes

Beautiful that's the only thing I can think about. This girl had beautiful eyes. Too bad they where full of tears. I look at her for a minute, am I hallucinating? This girl looked like Kagome. But her face looks too skinny.

"I…I'm sorry!" she said closing her eyes "I didn't mean to make you upset. Please forgive me. It won't happen again it was an accident. Please forgive me" she said as her tears began pouring. Ok I wasn't dreaming.

I move of her but she stays on the bed, her eyes shut. She doesn't move an inch. She just lays there with her hands over her eyes. Her small body shaking with sobs. I can't take my eyes of her.

"Please. Please forgive me"

I walk over by the bed and with out thinking I pick her up and make her stand in front of me. Kagome? No is just the alcohol giving me those beer goggles. I see what I want to see, and what I see right now is Kagome. But… I 'm not drunk right now? Sure I have a hangover, but hangovers don't allow me see Kagome

"Who are you?" I ask and wait for her answer. But she give me nothing, she just stares at me. Frozen "what's your name?" nothing again. I just stare at her. Just standing next to her makes me feel relaxed, she makes me feel so comfortable.

"Please forgive me! it won't happen again. I'm so, so, sorry" she said turning around and running out of my room. That can't be Kagome! Her hair reaches her lower back. Her body looks smaller than Kagome, and her face held no emotions. But I have a feeling, a very strong feeling about her.

But if that was Kagome! Which I'm not saying it was, what is she doing here? And why does she look like that!

I follow her until she walks into Inuyasha room. I knock on the door and try to open it.

"Please go away" she said through the door "please" I can hear her whispering.

"Who are you?"

"I don't know-"

"_Aki! I'm going to call you Aki! Is that ok with you?"_

"Aki. My name's Aki" I said as my tears pour faster. Right now I was scared. I had so many mixed emotions, who's this man! Why does he make me feel this way?

I don't know how long he's planning on staying out there, but I can see his shadow from underneath the door crack. He hasn't moved once. I look at the clock next to the bed. Twelve fifty nine. I've been in this room for more than three hours. And that man hasn't moved an inch.

He keeps talking to me. He said that he wanted his mother to see me. That he wasn't hallucinating. That I was truly here, that it wasn't a dream. 'I'm not drunk', he kept on saying. I don't know why I'm crying, but having him outside my door makes me so… it makes me so sad. I want to look into his eyes again. I want to feel his presence in the room.

I want him to hold me.

I lie in the bed and close my eyes. When is Yuzuki coming back?

When I open my eyes again it was two thirty seven. I felt weird for some reason, but the fist thing I did after opening my eyes was look down at the door to see if the man was still there. The shadow was gone.

I rubbed my eyes as I started getting up, when I removed my hand from my eye I saw red. I saw a bloody hand. My body immediately started shaking. Had I? Had I hurt the man like I done Naraku?

NO!

With my shaking hands I opened the door, and stepped into the hallway. I slowly walk until I reached his door. I opened the door but refused to go inside. I looked inside the dark room, but for I could see the room was empty.

Not knowing what to do I walk into the living room. But just like the rest of the house, it looks empty. My hands shake faster with each step I take and with each second that passes my heart beats faster. I'm a horrible person.

"Looks like someone decided to come out" I hear a voice coming from behind me. I spin around to be chest to face with 'him'. I backed away from him to see if I had hurt him. To see if he's ok.

"Are you dead?" he asked me as he stretched his left hand to touch my cheek. I moved back but his right hand grabbed my shoulder to keep me in place. "Is this blood?" he said as this thumb rubbed underneath my right eye.

I close my eyes not knowing what to do. I feel safe underneath his touch, but at the same time I feel frightened. I opened my eyes when I feel myself being pulled. I was being dragged to his room, and there was nothing I could do. His strength was overpowering me.

"Sit" he said as he pointed to his bed "come on, sit" he said as he walked into one of the doors in his room. His bathroom I think. I look around the room and this time I get a better look. There are liquor bottles all over the desk, and floor.

When he comes back he starts cleaning the dry blood with a wet cloth. Not taking his eyes of mine. His eyes are full of tears, but he refuses to let one single tear, fall.

Why's that?

"Why are you crying?" I reach up and touch my cheeks and sure enough my eyes cheeks are wet. I shrug as wipe my eyes. But before I can wipe all my tears away, he grabs my wrist and pulls it up to his face.

"Did you hurt yourself?" he asks as he starts cleaning my wrist, a scar that had opened up when I was sleeping. The cloth gets covered in blood. My blood. When all the dry blood is clean Sesshoumaru traces my scars with his fingers. I don't move, I just stare as his fingertips go up or down whenever it goes over my scars.

His fingers stop moving and my eyes open, he's looking to his left. I follow his gaze until I see what he's looking at.

Yuzuki's standing at the door. Looking at us! Looking at Sesshoumaru, with fear in her eyes.

"Sesshoumaru get away from her!" she said as she walked into the room and pulled on my arm. Sesshoumaru stepped away.

"Yuzuki! You found her! You found her!" Sesshoumaru screamed. As he tried to get hold on my arm. "You found her! I can't believe you found her!"

"No!" Yuzuki scrammed pulling me behind her back. Trying to keep me away from her son, "when are you going to understand that she's dead!" Yuzuki screams, hate spilling out of her mouth, like a poisonous snake. I take a step back, away from her.

"How can she be dead? When she's right there!" Yuzuki turns around to face me. She looks at me from head to toe before turning to see Sesshoumaru.

"Aki," she said looking at Sesshoumaru "could you go to your room" it's not a question, is a command. I nod and start to walk away. I turn to see Sesshoumaru staring at me.

"Sesshoumaru, you're drunk" Yuzuki said as I walked away. I get in 'my' room and sit on the bed. I left the door opened, big mistake.

"She's not who you think she's!" Yuzuki screams.

"I think I would know if _She_ was Kagome or not!" the name sends shivers down my back. I lie down in the bed and cover my ears with the pillow. I don't want to hear their screams. I don't want to hear that name.

"But you're drunk! You think everyone is Kagome! You think that lamp is Kagome! You think that chair is Kagome! You think that bottle is Kagome!" Yuzuki said pointing at everything in the room, before sitting down on the bed.

"I'm not drunk! And I know that's Kagome!" I scream walking over to my desk and grabbing a bottle of vodka. Before opening it and taking a very long mouthful that burns as it runs down my throat.

She's making me so angry. Why can't she believe me! That is Kagome! I'm sure of it. I've never been so sure, about something in my life before. Yuzuki gets up and grabs the bottle from my hands.

"Aki, is staying with us until she find her family, or at least some information about her" she said walking to the door "I brought her here, so she could be safe" she said turning around to look at me with glaring eyes "stay away from her" with that she's out of the room.

"Stay away from her" I say to myself. But how can I stay away from her when she lives in the same house as I do?

* * *

I dont know how long it's going to take me to update....because i dont know what to do anymore!! ^.^

But i'll try to update as soon as possible.


	24. Knock! Knock! Knock!::::

**::::Knock! Knock! Knock!::::**

_I don't own Inuyasha_

"Stay away from her" I say to myself. But how can I stay away from her when she lives in the same house as I do?

I don't even know what my mother thinks I'm going to do. Does she think I'm dangerous? Does she think I'm one of those crazy drunks that go around raping girls? What the fuck!

I lie down on my bed and close my eyes. I can't believe my own mother doesn't trust me! I've been leaving here for almost three month and she doesn't know me well enough to judge my character? How dare she believe such despicable things about me!

I open my eyes when I hear my door open to find mother bringing a miniature fridge into my room. What is this woman doing? I close my eyes and pretend to be sleeping. I hear her walk out of my room and than walking back in. After a couple of minutes I feel my bed tilt to the side.

"Sesshoumaru?" Yuzuki said shaking my shoulder. I open my eyes but don't get up. I wait for her to say what she wants to say. I'll let her at least get a couple of words in, before I kick her out of my room.

"I believe it will be a good idea for you to stay here" she said looking down at me "at least until Aki goes away, so she can be safe" she said standing up, and walking around the room.

"Whatever" I say sitting on the bed. And looking at the fridge she brought in here. There are a couple of instant ramen cups, bread and cereal on my desk. Does she expect me to live here for the rest of my life? What is her problem?

"I'm serious Sesshoumaru I don't even want you to look at her" she said placing her hand on my shoulder. "As soon as she leaves you can do what ever you want" I get up to get her hand away from me. I walk up to my bathroom door and get in. I don't want to see her right know.

When I come out, a couple of minutes later she's gone. I walk up to my door and try to open it. I need some fresh air or go for a walk anything right know. But…. My door is locked! What is this crazy woman doing!?!

I knock on my door trying to get her attention trying to get free from this room! Why is she doing this to me! If she doesn't want me here she should at least let me go to my home. To my own house, after all I'm a grown man!

"I'm sorry Sesshoumaru, but I'm locking you in until Aki is gone" she said through the door.

"Aki!?!" I scream as I knock on the door louder. "There's no Aki! In this fucking house woman!" I scream hitting the door with my fist as hard as possible. I can see the blood running down my wooden door but I refuse to stop.

"I'm doing this for your own good" she said as I heard her footsteps walking away from my door. When she gone I keep on hitting on the door. I don't stop. My arms get heavy with each punch but I can't stop. Not until I get out of here, not until I see her again.

It's been about five days since the girl that's 'not Kagome' came to live with us. And I haven't spoken to her since the fist time I saw her. My mother makes sure she locks my door before going to work. She also makes sure she feeds me! In my room I should add. I can't believe am not even allowed out of my own room!

I'm sure this is illegal!

I lay in my bed for hours trying to fall asleep. But with every time I close my eyes it gets harder for me to go to sleep. Different voices fill my head, and than there is always banging on the door. It's around midnight when Sesshoumaru goes on a hitting spree, where he hits the door for a long time.

Knock. Knock.

I look up to see Yuzuki walking into the room. She sits and smiles at me. I look at the clock. 2:00 AM. She walks next to me and sits on a chair that's next to the bed. She looks at me with a smile on her face.

"I didn't though you would be sleeping, so I decided to come tell you that I need to go to the hospital" she said looking around the room. She's really happy. I've never seen her smile like this before. "I'll be back later" she said and waits for me to ask. I can tell by looking into her eyes that she wants me to ask, she wants to tell someone, and it just happens the that someone is me right now.

"Why are you going? Are you sick?" she lets a playful laugh escape her lips.

"No, I'm not sick" she said moving on to sit next to me on the bed. "You see, I have another son" she said looking at me with tears in her eyes. Happy tears "my younger son woke up ten minutes ago!" she said getting up.

"So he's at the hospital?"

"Yes Aki! He woke up at the hospital! I'm so happy! They didn't thought he was ever going to wake up" she said walking out of my room, before walking back to tell me something that to her was of great importance. Something so important, that her happiness banished as soon as she starts speaking.

"Please go back to sleep, I don't really know the time I'm coming back" she said looking down the hall "but please stay away from my Sesshoumarus' room" she waits for me to say something, anything but my throat seems to dry to make a sound so I nod.

Happy with my nodding she walks away from my room again. As soon as I hear the front door shut I relax. She gone. I lie back down on my bed and try to go to sleep. But as soon as I close my eyes the banging starts full force.

I get up from my bed and before I know it, my back is against Sesshoumarus' door. He not hitting the door anymore, he's not moving at least from what I can hear. I lay my head against the door and close my eyes.

Drip

I feel a tear slide down my cheek. As soon as the first sob began, my tears filled the rim of my eyes. He's crying, and just the thought of that makes me cry. I cover my mouth with my hand trying to block my own sobs from being heard.

For some reason I know that he's sitting on the other side of the door. His back where my back is, and his head's where my head rest. That's why I'm not surprise when I hear him say the name, as if he were whispering in my ear.

"Kagome" I close my eyes because that name is like a punch to my gut. It makes my breathing increase and decrease at the same time. I close my eyes and listen to his whispers and his breathing through the door.

Every time the name is spoken through his lips the fear that I feel is a stable reminder of the life I barley possess. Of a life that belongs to the man that is supposed to love me. A remainder of everything I've lost and the hell that my life had been. Yet I don't know why I feel this way. It's a reminder that wont let me remember him or who I am

"_But you're drunk! You think everyone is Kagome! You think that lamp is Kagome! You think that chair is Kagome! You think that bottle is Kagome!"_

_It's late he's going to be home soon. He is a man that unlike me deserves to die. He is the nastiest man I know. The worst person that I've known in my life._

_The door slams with such strength, with such anger that makes me stop and stare at him. He walks towards me and before silencing my sobs with his hand. He grabs a handful of my hair and looks into my eyes, as he pulls my hair until I'm sitting In the middle of the floor._

"_Where's Inuyasha?" I ask. Not caring about the pain that my head, is suffering. This is my entire fault! Inuyasha shouldn't have tried to help me. He shouldn't have tried to do what he did._

"_Inuyasha is dead my dear!" he said with a smile on his face. He was dead? He was dead because he said he loved me? He was dead because he tried to help me._

"_Oh Kagome, my dear little Kagome" he said kissing my cheek "you shouldn't have even talked to him, you shouldn't have touched him!" he said before throwing me against the wall._

_My head hurts as soon as it made contact with the wall. I look up at him with tearful eyes, and touch the back of my head. He looks down at me with guilt in his eyes before walking towards me._

"_I'm sorry my love" he said scooping me up in his arms. He walked slowly to the couch and sits with me in his arms. He rubs my back as if trying to comfort me, like he's trying to say that everything's fine. That he didn't just hurt me._

_His left hand moves under my shin and lifts it up slowly. As his face gets closer and closer, I can feel his breath on my lips as he whispers._

"_Kagome! my beautiful bride. My beautiful Kagome" his lips get so close to mine that I can barely feel them touching mine. I put my face in front of his chest to push him away but his doesn't seem to notice._

"_No!"_

Knock! Knock! Knock!

"Yuzuki! Yuzuki!" what is going on? Why are there screams coming from the other side of my door. The screams started a little after I had calmed down and have been going for a couple of minutes now.

"No!" the worst part is that I'm locked in. I can't even check if everything's ok. I hit my door harder. "Get off!" that's Kagome. What's wrong with her? I know its her. I know it!

"_When are you going to understand that she's dead!"_

"Get off! Please!" I hear her screaming. Where is Yuzuki? Why isn't she protecting Kagome? Or Aki? Why isn't she going to her aid? There's a banging on my door, and foots steps before they fade into silence.

"No" I hear her voice and her cries for help. What's going on? With out thinking I start banging on the door, as hard as possible until my soar fist hurt. Before growing tired of her screams and throwing my whole body against the door. I feel like a wild animal on a cage trying to get free. I have to get out of here.

All of the sudden the door breaks letting me free from my imprisonment. I look around and try to find her. Try to find who ever is hurting her. Who ever is making her cry the way she is.

I walked until I was in Inuyashas' room. The lights were off. The room was in complete darkness except for the alarm clock that read 4:09AM. I looked over at the bed to make sure that the bed was empty.

Dejavu

I looked to the left of the room where I found her sitting on the corner of the room holding her self. She wasn't moving she just sat there. She looked lifeless. I walked closer to her, and that's when I heard her whispering to herself.

"It was only a dream, it was only a dream" she said bringing back memories almost a year old. She had to be Kagome. But that… I already knew. That was something that no matter what anyone said was true,

"Kagome?" I said walking slowly towards her. "Are you ok?" as soon as she heard my voice she looked at up with tearful eyes. I walked closer to her and got on my knees so I could be at the same level as her. She just sat there staring at me.

"Sorry if I woke you, I had a bad dream" she said looking away from me.

"Kagome?"

"I'm Aki?" she whispered, before moving away from me. Still close enough to feel her body heat on my skin "Kagome's dead your mother said so" she said putting her head on her knees.

"No!" I scream making her look up at me, in surprise and fear "Kagome is not dead! You are Kagome don't you remember?" I said before stretching my hands out to her "don't you remember me?"

She doesn't say anything she just sits there looking at my hands, looking at me. Before once again her tears began falling and her sobbing became uncontrollable to her.

"I want to be who you want! I want to be someone! But I can't!" she said crying. Her eyes glued to my hands. "I really do. I feel like I know you! But I can't remember!" she stretches her hands until her fingertips barely touch mine.

Slowly moving her hands closer until they're on top of mine. She stops before pulling her hands away from mine like they where on fire.

"You need to go back to your room… Yuzuki said you weren't allowed out" I smile at her, before wrapping my arms around her waist and pulling her body close to mine in a tight embrace. Her body stiffens.

"I never stopped looking for you" I said before moving my face to her shoulder to whisper in her ear "because no matter what, you'll always be my world," I hold her tight not wanting her to leave not wanting to let go "and after loosing you for almost a year, I found out that you're my life" I get up with her in my arms and lay her on the bed "because with out you, it was so hard for me to stay alive"

I walk out of her room into the kitchen, before walking back to my room with a screwdriver on my hand. After this Yuzuki won't be able to lock me in my room, anymore. Ever again!


	25. Like A Fish

**::::Like a Fish::::**

_I don't own Inuyasha_

Since I got the news paper today, I haven't been able to stop thinking about her. What is there for me to do? I miss her so much! I haven't seen her in so long! This has been the longest time we've been apart and I feel weak without her by my side.

"My dear" I whisper to the picture before shoving it in my wallet. "I'll have you back. Sooner than you think and you won't have to suffer this Christmas without me". Our fist Christmas together.

Oh joy to the world indeed!

I push the door open and walk into the station. Everyone looks at me and it makes me nervous, what if they recognize me?-But it doesn't matter, my wife's love gives me the strength to walk right in.

"Good morning officer-" a man with a bandage around his head said walking up to the front desk. Looking down at the officers name tag "Yratne"

"Good morning, Sir how might I be of assistance?" officer Yratne said looking up at the strange man. He watched as The man jammed his hand in his pocket and got out a piece of paper.

"I was reading the paper when I saw this picture" the man said handing him a picture of a beautiful girl with black hair and blue eyes. "I've been looking for her for the last couple of months" he said as he took a sit in front of him.

"Oh" the officer said not sure of what to say "what is your relation to this girl?" he asked once again looking down at the girl in the picture and at the man.

"She's … my sister" he said as he got his wallet out and searched in it, for something. He got a picture out and gave it to the officer.

In the picture were two people. The man in front of him and the girl he had found a couple of days ago wondering the streets in a wedding dress. The man was kissing the girls cheek while the girl looked as if she was about to cry.

"Her name is Martshi Kyome, she left with her boyfriend, a substance user" he watched as the man spoke trying to find something in his voice that would give him a warning about this man, for some reason he didn't trust him. "She called one day, saying she was coming back but she never did"

"What might you're name be?" Yratne asked the man in front of him. With out another word the man took his wallet out and gave him his I.D. Martshi Ross.

"But anyway I was wondering if I could take her home?" the man said putting his ID in his wallet "my parent are sick and want to see her, they have been so worried"

"I have a few question before I can give you any information" the officer said as he got a piece of paper and a pen.

He was determined to get the information he needed, to find her. After all they where together. He loved her so much, he was willing to forget about the injury to his head. He was willing to forget everything as long as he could have her back.

"What in heavens hell!?!" I woke up as soon as I heard Yuzuki screaming and walked out of my room. And there she was looking down at the door that was lying on the ground in the middle of the hallway. "Seshoumaru!" she screamed. Not noticing me standing there.

I looked to my left when I hear his footsteps coming to his '_door-less door'_ He stands against the doorframe rubbing the sleep from his eyes with a smirk on his face. He looked at the door and up to Yuzuki, before waving at her. I freeze. Theses…this looks familiar…

_"Good morning Kagome, Higurashi my name is Sesshoumaru Tashio, and I'm your new partner"_

"Is something the matter, mother?" I look back at Sesshoumaru as he steps out of his room and walks over to her. She stays quiet as he walks over to her. Not moving an inch

"What did you do to the door?" mother half asked, half scream as I walked passed her to get something to drink from the fridge.

"What do you mean?" I ask searching the fridge for something, anything good.

"You know what I'm talking about!" she screamed getting irritated by my question. I take a gallon of orange juice and drink out of it. Making mothers anger increase.

"Oh I just took the screws off" I said turning around and putting the gallon back on the fridge, before turning and giving her the biggest smile my lips could master. I'm sure that I looked like a psycho but I didn't care.

"Oh! You took the screws off, but how did you get out of your room?" she asked tapping her fingers on the table.

"You see there was something wrong with the door…" I said smiling at her "and I needed to get out, but the stupid door it wouldn't open. Can you believe that? So I kinda, sorta broke the door" I said. "And since the door was already broken I decided to make it look like the ones at the hospital"

"Sesshoumaru why! You promised" she said turning to look at 'the girl that is not Kagome'. That's what I'm going to call her because I'm not calling her by a name that doesn't belong to her. A fake name.

"I never promised anything!" I screamed.

"You're drunk!" mother accused me grabbing me by the wrist and pulling me down the hallway towards my room.

I pull on my arm and make her stop. I take the deepest breath my lungs can breathe and blow on her face. She looks at me with half a smile.

"I'm not drunk" I tell her. "Now if you excuse me, I'm going to go talk to 'the girl that is not Kagome'" I said walking into Kagomes room to find her lying on the bed tracing the patterns on the bedcovers with her fingers.

"Leave the door open!" mother scream as I walk into the room I can hear the smile on her voice. What's up with her?

I look down at Kagome but she doesn't acknowledge me she just lays there her index finger moving across the blankets. She closes her eyes but continues tracing the patterns.

"You say you know me right?" she said as her hand stopped moving and her eyes snapped open. She looks at me with a sad expression on her face. "What happed to me?" she asked sitting up on her bed... "Why can't I remember you?" She pats the bed, and I sit next to her.

"Where's my family?"

"I have always been a very lonely person" I tell the officer as we park outside my house my house. Everything I need to know is written on a little white piece of paper in my wallet. I get out of the car and walk up to my front door.

"You sure live hidden in the woods" the officer said walking behind me. The way he says it makes me wonder how many times he'd seen scary movies, because by the sound of it I don't think he's ever seen one.

"well, I would spend many hours, days, and sometimes even weeks with a sensation of utter loneliness consuming me, so the doctor I had told me to move here, with my parents" I say opening the door, I could feel a smile coming to my lips, but I push it away.

"So you would think I would find myself elated when I heard one of the girls was in love with me" I said closing the door behind me.

"What are you talking about?"

"Oh, sorry I must not be making much sense!" I said walking to the living room. "Take a sit I'll get my mother to talk to you" I said walking down to the kitchen.

How stupid can this man be? Oh my god this has been the easiest thing I've ever done in my life. It makes me want to laugh. But that can wait. At least until it's all over.

I walked back to the living room to find the man dialing a number on his phone. I walk slowly behind him, not making a noise. He can't see me, he's back is turn to me but I can't see a gun on his hand.

Did he figure it out? Oh well if he did, he found out to late.

"Don't even think about it." Without another word, I bring the bat down on his head, a scream of twisted pain burst from his lips. I raised the bat again and hit into officers Yratne head another time and another and another. Blood spewed forth like a crimson fountain as I threw back my head and laughed. Oh how I missed this!

"Beautiful!" I screamed grabbing the body and pulling it down to my wife's room.

"I have to go" Sesshoumaru said getting up from my bed. We ate on my bed. We practically spend the whole day in bed. Talking about nothing!

"Goodnight" I say as he walks out.

"'night" Why didn't he answer any of my questions? He only told me the things he wanted me to know. I already knew that my name was supposed to be Kagome. But that's all he said!

I get up and walk to the window. I don't know why but about two hours ago I've had a weird feeling on the pit of my stomach, as if someone has been watching me. I look out and watch the snow fall, this is the first time I've noticed that there's no curtains.

Why doesn't this house have curtains? With that in mind I walk over to the closet and change into a night gown and run to the bed before hiding in the blankets.

Tonight is the first night I don't feel safe. I feel like I'm trapped. Like a fish in a tank, with their owner watching close, tapping on the glass.

Darkness

_Get up! Get up and run! You have to run! RUN! Again I run through the streets as the cold wind pricked my skin like a thousand needles, wanting the blood from beneath my skin to come out. _

"_Together, forever my darling!" I hear a voice as I run faster. I look down, my shoes! I forgot my shoes again! But is too late for me to go back! I must run! Find help! My blue lips pout as I breathed harder. My eye lashes were frozen, I knew if I'd touched them they would break._

_Tears were rolling down my eyes freezing on their way down, every drip frozen before they could reach the ground. Yet the blood dripped no matter what. My once pale skin, now a light blue shade._

"_Come here Kagome!" I see a man inform of me "I'll keep you warm!" my feet move on their own trying to reach the one calling me. Trying to get to this familiar voice._

_I'm less than a foot away , but I can't still see his face. "Is alright we were meant to be together" In arms spread open and they wrap around his neck. I don't have control of my body. Of anything._

"_I've missed you so much!" the man said. _

"_I've missed you too Kouga" I scream kissing his cheek, than his lips. I look into his eyes. Blue eyes look back at me. I rest my head on his chest.  
_

"_Kouga? What are you talking about?" I pull away when I hear his voice change into a voice, a darker evil voice. "Are you ready to go home?"__With one movement, he wrapped an arm around my waist and another across my mouth, pulling me closer to him, until my ear rested next to his lips. _

"_Tonight we die!" he said laughing. I kick and kick. Feeling my toes break with each kick._

"Kagome, wake up!" I feel myself being moved. "Wake up!!"


	26. Mustn’t say he’s in love

Hey people who like this story ^-^ sorry it has taken me so long to update but… I've been having a very busy month which is supper good and bad at the same time... that doesn't matter..lol there's no excuse for my tardiness lol…so here's chapter number twenty six! Italic are dreams and memories..

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**Mustn't say he's in love**

_I don't own Inuyasha_

I open my eyes when I hear a door open. With out thinking I get up and walk into the living room. Everything is pure darkness.

I walk until I'm standing in the middle of the living room, and look into the kitchen to find Yuzuki pouring her self a cup of coffee.

"I didn't mean to wake you" she said not even looking at me. She just kept on pouring her coffee into the cup. I stare at her before walking and sitting on the kitchen table.

"Where did you go yesterday?" I ask before I can stop the words from escaping my lips. She turns to face me, and smiles a sad smile, before sitting across from me.

"I went to see…Inuyasha" she said taking a drink of her extra black coffee. The so called smile faded from her face.

"How is he?" I ask, not that I care or anything, but I hope his okay. I know he survived but… but I hope everything will go back to normal.

"He's fine, I guess" she said wiping the corner of her eye. Trying not to cry "it's just that he can't speak, something in his throat was fracture" she said looking at her watch. Seven thirty-five.

"Where are you going so early?" I ask trying to change the conversation. This works perfectly. Since she starts to get up, ready to leave.

"Early? Sesshoumaru, its seven forty five in the afternoon, you and Kagome slept for almost the whole day" she said digging in her purse that was to her left on the table "umm, anyway, I got a call and I need to go to meet with Yratne " she said smiling.

"Is that some sort of date?" I ask grinding my teeth. Just the idea of her going out with another man, other than my father makes my blood boil. The respect she had gain hours ago started vanishing, leaving nothing but the hatred that I held for her.

"No, not a date" she said looking into my hate filled eyes, "I got a call from Yratne, Officer Yratne" she said walking over to the sink and washing her cup.

"Ok?" am I supposed to know this guy?

"Well officer Yratne, he was the one who found 'Kagome' he called and said that he found some information, so I'm going to meet him" she said, as her eyes wondered back and forth, not wanting to meet my eyes.

She walks over to me and grabs her bag. She play with her keys before speaking "there's some food in the oven, you just have to put it on three hundred and fifty" she said walking over to the door.

"Why are you meeting him so late?" I ask walking her to the door. For some reason this bothers me.

"It snowed all day, it just stopped and he said it was an emergency" she said opening the door. "I'll call later" she said walking out of the door.

I walk over to the window and watch her get in her car. She sits there for a while before turning her lights on. Another minute goes bye before she finaly starts the car and leaves.

I'm still looking out the window when I see a shadow running across the street. It's coming this way. Not thinking much of it. I close the blinds and turn around and start walking back to my room. It's eight in the afternoon and I haven't eaten anything. My stomach makes noises and I start walking back into the kitchen but stop when I hear Kagome talking.

"I've missed you too Kouga" I walk back until I'm standing right outside her door. Kouga?

_"Yes. Sesshoumaru it began-after Kouga's funeral"_

I turn the handle, and turn the lights on. She's lying on her bed face up. Her face held a very strange expression. I stare at her for a few second before I start walking away from the door, I'm about to turn the lights off when I hear a weird noise that stops me.

I turn back to face her and that's when I see her moving her arms, as if she were trying to punch someone, soon after that her legs start kicking until the blankets are off her body,

With out thinking I run to her side and grab her shoulders. "Kagome!" I scream holding her down. But my words don't seem to reach her. Her arms go flying everywhere, and that's when her hand hits me with some supernatural force for her body size. My head goes sideways and I can taste the blood in my mouth.

Her left hand grabs her right and her nails do all the work. As blood drips from the cut. Her nails do everything possible to make the cuts deeper. To make the cuts bleed as much blood as possible. I grab her writs and separate them. She's cutting in her sleep!

"_Tonight we die!" he said laughing. I kick and kick. Feeling my toes break with each kick._

"Kagome, wake up!" _I feel myself being moved. _"Wake up!!"

"_Why don't you listen to him?" the man said looking up. Into the sky "come on you know you want to" he said loosening his grip on me._

"Wake up!" _I hear him scream louder, closer to me. I look up at the faceless man. His smile comes into the light and soon all his face is shown._

"_I'll see you soon my darling!" the sinister man lets go of my waist and I start to float away my wrist start being pulled up. I going to heaven I finally die._

I was pulled from my disturbing dreams by the bright light beginning to break through my eyelids. Stray strands of my hair stuck to my tear-stained cheeks. I focus my eyes to find Sesshoumaru sitting on my stomach. What's going on?

"Wake up" he said holding my wrist above my head. I stare up at him. This is the closest he's ever been to me, and I can't move. My chest moves up and down with every sob that breaks through.

"Wha-what's wrong?" I ask when I focus on the look on his face. The corner of his mouth is bleeding. He doesn't say anything he just stares at me. "Sesshoumaru?" He doesn't say anything he just stays there, on top of me… Staring.

I try to move my hand but they're pinned above my head. I stare at him. I can't help but to stare at him, he's so beautiful. My head automatically turned upward, some unknown force pulling me up, as his bents down. Our faces mere millimeters away from each other, my bloodshot eyes locked on his lips, his bleeding lips. I can feel his hot, moist breath against my skin, practically taste the peppermint mouthwash.

No! This can't be happening! No! I let my head fall back into the pillow. I can't allow my emotions to take over. I can't fall for him. I can't put him in danger. Like…

"_You love her!?!" The sinister man said standing above Inuyasha. "What a waste of affection!" he said kicking his stomach. _

_Blood dripping from his mouth._

"_Please stop!" Kagome screamed running over to Naraku and the bleeding man on the ground "he was just joking!" she screamed holding onto his arm "right? You where just joking! Tell him!" Kagome screamed as her tears spilled her puffy eyes "Inuyasha please tell him!"_

_But Inuyasha didn't say anything he just stared at her "I'm sorry I got you into this! I should have known!" he said spitting on Naraku shoes._

"_Shut up!" Naraku screamed kicking his stomach "answer her!"_

"_Just tell him you where joking! Please" she said looking into his eyes._

"_I can't do that-"_

"_Tell him! Tell him you were joking!!Do it!" Kagome screamed hysterical "please! Inuyasha!!"_

"_I love you! I won't lie!" _

"_That's all I needed to hear!" Naraku screamed pushing Kagome off his arm and kicking him on the face. "You can't! And wont say those words to My Kagome ever again!" he said kicking his head and stomach again and again as his laugher filled the room._

"_Stop! Please!" Kagome screamed from the spot she was sitting on, her hands over her ears. "Please!"_

"_Never again! Will those words come out your mouth!" he said turning him over so he could look at his face "Ever!!" he said stepping on his neck._

"Sesshoumaru" I said looking away from him "I can't breathe" with that he lets go of my writs. I look at them his fingers leave a mark from his tight hold. He slowly gets off me.

"Kagome," he said sitting next to me on the bed. "I think, I think I might have fallen…in lo-" As soon as those word come out of his mouth my hand covers his lips.

"No!" I said getting up and walking over to the door. I'm ready to walk away from him. He can't say that! He can never say that! He's not Naraku! Naraku is the only one allowed to love me! He won't get hurt by loving me!

As I walk to the door his words make me stop! They freeze time as I stand the door.

"I love you" slowly I turn to find him standing no more than two feet way from me. Looking down at me with such intensity. I look away from him not wanting to look at him any longer. I can feel my eyes fill with tears.

Tap. Tap.

"Darling!" I hear a scream and turn my head to my left to where the window is, Sesshoumaru does the same and I know I didn't imagine it. There's some tapping on the window, I see a wide smile before the lights on the house go out.

Darkness.

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I'll try to update as soon as i can... please be Patient ^_^


	27. Hello Death

Hey people! I know I haven't uploaded in a while! But I am now. My computer wasn't working but I got it fixed. And I'm almost done with it. Actually I have 4 chapters done I'm trying to finish the last chapter but I'm not sure if I want it to be a happy ending or what.. I'm going to try an upload every four to five days so it can be done this month. So tell me what you think! ^_^

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Hello Death

I don't own Inuyasha

Everything is dark. The only thing that gives light is the window and only because the moon is out. Sesshoumaru and I stay silent for minute or so as we hear the laughter coming from the window. We can't see anything. There's nothing on the window, but than we hear the tapping sound again and see a hand.

Tap. Tap. Tap.

Than his voice fills the room "Open the door darling! I'm here to pick you up!" it's a happy voice. A voice, which a child would be happy to hear on his birthday. But it only, makes my skill cold. It makes me wish I were dead, to avoid this.

Sesshoumaru grabs my shoulders and pulls me. Everything is dark so I don't even know if he's in front of me or behind. The tapping noise gets louder and soon I'm blinded by a bright light coming from the window. Sesshoumaru looks down at me and pulls me towards him.

"Come on" he says pulling my arm and wrapping his arm around my waist. The light still lights the room and Sesshoumaru takes the lead and opens the door.

"No! Let go of her!!" I turn around and as soon as I do there's a loud noise. Everything seems to be going in slow motion. The window breaks. Sesshoumaru lands on the floor closing the door on his way down. What's going on?! Everything's going to fast!

I get on my knees and crawl next to him. I need to see what's wrong with him. What happed! Why is he on the ground? I move closer to him but before I can reach him the wet floor stops me.

Warm. Wetness.

I stay still for a minute before I lift my hand up to my face and stare at it. What is this? As if to answer my question the lights go on. As soon as my eyes adjust to the light, I crawl closer to the bloody mess Sesshoumaru laid on. He was bleeding! He was dying! I look over to the window to see it empty.

"Sesshoumaru!" I say shaking his shoulders "come on wake up!" I say looking between the window and his body. He wasn't moving! He just laid still. Like a statue, like a cadaver…

Knock. Knock

He's at the door! He has come from me! He's here to punish my stupidity! He's mad! But than again I've given him all reasons for him to be upset! I've hurt him. I've betrayed him.

"Kagome it's me! Don't you remember me? It's me! Naraku!" the voice comes from the other side of the door. _Go away!_

"Naraku?" she said, her voice mellifluous, flowing like honey to my hungry ears.

"Why?! Why are you here!?" I could hear the sexy undertone to her words, knew it was a game, a verbal foreplay, to which she wanted me to respond in, before sweeping her off her feet. I decided to indulge her.

"I'm here for my beautiful bride!" I say turning the door handle and pushing it open. But the door shuts on my face. She won't let me in that easy, ha! She wants to play hard to get.

"What! Please leave! You're crazy" she said, and my heart wrenched with desire. I couldn't help but to smile at her words! Some couples use pet names, and for some reason that happens to be mine. I like to think that it's because we met in a mental place.

"Come on my sweet girl! Open the door!" I say with a smile on my face. Soon we'll be reunited! I move away from the door and run as fast as I can and crash the door open. I look inside to find her lying on the ground. Had I hurt her? Had the door hit her when it opened?

I stepped inside, feeling how very close Kagome was to me, after all this days we where back in the same room! I could hear her heart beating and her each and every breath. I could smell her hair, her skin and…her blood!

I walk closer to her until she was only a foot away from me, so close. I get on my knees and flip her over so I could see that beautiful face. But when I do all I see is red. I had hurt her once again! There was blood on her face. I had hit her with the door.

"Uuh" I hear a noise coming from my left side. He's still alive. Why must this family be so hard to kill! It's his fault Kagome got injured! That ass! I get my gun from my pocket and get ready to get rid of this man.

"wha-what are you doing?" I turn to my right to find Kagome looking at me. She doesn't seem that happy to see me. She points at the man, before she wipes the blood from her face.

"We need to get rid of this man, so we can be together again" I say smiling at her. I'm happy to see her. I place my gun on top of his head, the sooner he's dead the better.

"Close your eyes and cover you ears!" I say smiling. I wouldn't want her innocence to be ruin because of me.

"No!" my Kagome said grabbing my arm and holding it close to her chest. "No lets just go" My every sense was heightened, overloaded by Kagome's proximity. "Please lets just go… lets go ...ho-home"

I smile at her. Together again we'll be as happy as we can. Once the doors are shut again, once we were safely away from the others' prying eyes, she'd be mine, all mine… I would love her and she would love me, forever.

Like before! No! Who am I kidding…? Better than before! Because this time there won't be any interruptions! We'll be alone! Away from everyone, on a different state! Who knows maybe even country! But for this to happen I need to get rid of him!

I turned to face Kagome, she was smiling at me, while her tears pour because of her joy. Her eyes shimmering, all that desire for me so clear. So out in the open.

And yet still she stuck to our old game.

"lets go" she said.

But I only looked at her, drinking up close every inch of her beauty. I could hardly believe she belonged to me. Only, me.

"I love you" I tell her pulling her out of the room. Kagome looked at me with her head tilted, frowning, as if she couldn't understand what I meant. I was tiring of her games- I wanted to love her as she deserved, as she wanted.

"uhh?"

But I knew what she wanted; she was only waiting for me to make the first move. Always she wanted it to be me who made the first move…after all I was the man and she was the lady! She couldn't behave like a slut! She had to behave like a proper lady.

Like my lady.

So I took Kagome's wrist and pulled her to me, cupping her face in one hand, and he lower back with my left. And oh, how sweet it was to finally touch her, hold her, and feel her skin against mine once again. I kissed her as I parted her lips with mine, almost gasping at the sensation…

She gasped, pulled at me, but I held her close to me, showing her it was safe now to let go of the game…But then Kagome elbowed me hard on the side, wrenched herself from me with a little cry…

I was stunned, staring at her in disbelief as I held my side. What was she doing- what had I done wrong?

She was staring at me too, shaking, afraid- scared at me, afraid of me?! How- why was she afraid of me when this was what she had wanted? What had this family done to her! What had this bastard made her believe!

"Get away from me!" she screamed running away from me. That man had scared her away from me! He had done something to her.

"Kagome, it's okay now," I said, going toward her, but she quickly backed away, eyes wary. "Your parents are dead- they'll never have to know. We can finally fulfill our love- it's safe to. You don't have to pretend, you don't' have to fear."

"LOVE you? I don't love you- I hardly know you!" Kagome sputtered. "Please, get out! Just go away" She said as she ran out off the room into the hallway. With out thinking I followed behind her.

I couldn't believe it. I KNEW she loved me, knew it! This had to be a test- she was seeing how much I really loved her, how far I would go to convince her. I could not fail her test.

"I know you don't mean that," I said tenderly. "Let me show you how much I love you." I said as I got a hold of her arm. But she pulled on it. She wouldn't let me have her.

I pulled her to me, began to kiss her lips, her neck. But she writhed in my arms, rigid and flailing, as though my touch appalled her- disgusted her! "Lets' go home! Like you asked lets go" I crawl on top of her and hug her.

"Oh god, get off, get off of me! I don't love you- stop it! I don't love you, leave me alone!" she said as she pushed my body away from hers.

What was she saying? She couldn't mean it- she couldn't! I had no doubt she loved me- but then why did she keep fighting me, why did keep denying me?

Confused, I tried even harder to kiss Kagomes lips, to hold her against me. But she still fought me… and now she was screaming, screaming so loudly I was alarmed.

Did she really not love me anymore?

I place my hand over Kagome's mouth, clamping it tight. Not wanting to hear her lies! But she kept screaming! The noise still audible… Breaking my heart.

I kept my hand over her face, her nose, pressing harder, trying to keep out her yells… and I held her hard around the waist, all the time pleading with her. "Stop, Kagome, stop, I love you…"

I thought she was listening… her screams got quieter, she wasn't hardly making any noise… she stopped kicking so hard, and then she stopped completely. I was so glad, so happy…. I kissed her then, hugged her, told her how much I loved her, how good it would to be with her.

"Kagome?" I say after a few seconds, after she had stopped screaming but then I realized- she wasn't moving. She wasn't breathing. Was she dead? had i taken her life?


	28. Crazy Beautiful Past

I don't know if you guys will like this chapter much. I think this chapter's weird, but oh well. Don't forget to review! **^_^**

**:::::Crazy Beautiful Past:::::**

_I don't own Inuyasha_

I thought she was listening… her screams got quieter, she wasn't hardly making any noise… she stopped kicking so hard, and then she stopped completely. I was so glad, so happy…. I kissed her then, hugged her, told her how much I loved her, how good it would to be with her. But she was… she was dead….

"No! Kagome?"

But then I realized- she wasn't moving, but to my relief was she breathing. She was so beautiful. She was so peaceful.

I really don't understand what happened just a minute ago. I don't understand Kagomes behavior or mine. I can't believe I could have killed her with out even trying to.

Especially when I thought I was being kind to her. I was merely holding her. What in heavens hell had I done! If I had done something to my Kagome, I don't know what I would have done.

I slide down the wall until in sitting with Kagome on my lap. And push her dark hair of her face. Beautiful, such I beautiful girl had I fallen for. But it makes me wonder, is her beauty only on the surface. Why else would she have reacted the way she did to my touch. Was I not good enough for her?

I take her hand, close my eyes and kiss it. My eyes snap open. Could she possibly see through me! Could she truly see what kind of monster she fell in love with? Could she see my past? Could she see the reasons I was in the mental hospital a few years ago?

"All I've always wanted was love! I didn't care from who or what. I wanted a family that would love me. I wanted someone to care for me. I guess you could say I was an attentions whore, to put it nicely." I speak into her ear. Maybe if I explain to her my past she will see past it. I mean it's not that bad.

"My mother was barely home, and the only time she would speak to me was when she wanted me out of her way. This was every night, when she brought a different man to the house." I tell her stroking her cheek.

"My father…well let me tell you about that bastard. He was the only one that gave me attention too much attention if you know what I'm saying." I hold her body close to mine. Trying to feel her warmth, and look out the window.

"But, whatever. I needed attention was a ten year old boy. Can you tell me what kind of ten year old doesn't need attention? But believe me I didn't needed their attention. I just wanted them to acknowledge they had a kid. They could drown in their attention for all I care. Ha. And that's exactly what happened, dear." I tell her I slowly get up with her in my arms. Man she sure put on some pounds in the time she was here. But what can I say, more of her to love.

"Well one night I got tired of everything and decided to end it all. What better way to do it that to kill them all. I know what you're thinking. And yes, everything I did, I did it with love." I walk back into the room and the man still on the floor.

Dead I hope

I hear Kagomes stomach speak, a noise I missed so much. After all back in the good old days when she didn't want to speak to me I would wait days until her stomach started talking to me. I can help but to smile. I love her so much.

I stay quiet on the floor. I need to come up with a plan in order to get Kagome and myself out of here safe. I need to think of something. I keep my eyes close and keep on pretending to be passed out. At least until I can do something.

I hear some struggling but refuse to move. I must stay quiet in order to survive this. I need to save my strength so I can get Kagome and I out of here. I need to come up with a good plan, something that will guarantee me that at least Kagome will make it alive, because that's the only thing that matters to me, that she's safe.

"I'm so glad that we can be together again" I hear the Mans' voice as he walks around in the room. I keep my eyes shuts. "Here my love" he says "you must be cold!" I hear the bed squeal. They're on the bed.

"But let me finish my story. I got rid of father first, it was rather beautiful" Naraku spoke and I froze. What was he talking about "I remember raising the knife above the monster I had once known as my dad. Ha! In fast motion, his head was severed and blood spurted to cover my whole body, it was so artistic"

I hear Kagome moan and that make my blood cold. I don't know weather it's in pain or pleasure but I don't like either one of those choices. The bed squeals again and I'm relived when I hear foot steps. Before I know it there's intense pain coming from my stomach.

"After father it was mothers turn, that's when the fun began…I remember as if it was yesterday. I walked to her room with father by my side…well with fathers head to be more precise" I can't believe what I'm hearing this man is a monster. I under estimated him. He's a heartless bastard.

"I remember walking in and finding mother asleep with her lover. It was such a beautiful sight. Maybe if she would had given me an ounce of that attention this would've had a happier ending" I can't even think! I want to cover my ears! Block this sinister story! He takes a few steps away from me and gets back on the bed.

"I remember slowly getting on my mothers bed and cutting her lovers throat. He didn't even make a sound. Didn't move! Nothing… I remember lying in between mother and the other mans corps, hugging my fathers head. At least for a few minutes" I can't help but wonder how long this man plans on keeping me alive.

"I remember mothers face when she saw me, the same exact joyful face you make when you see me…she screamed before my father gave her a good bye kiss…and before I knew it was off with her head" he stops for a second. "Well not all the way, just a little bit, just enough for her to drown on her blood. Oh I'm sorry I forgot you where hungry" he said changing character. Split personality? No he's just plain crazy!

The bed squeals. Before I get another kick on my back. "How dare you try to take the most important thing from me? The only pure being in my life!" I ignore the pain and keep on playing dead. "What a waste!" he said before walking out of the room.

I don't move I stay still waiting for him to come back. When I hear the beeping of the stove I know this is my chance to get away! This is my chance to fix this.

I slowly get up from the floor ignoring the pain coming from my stomach, and walk over to Kagome. She seems to be sleeping on the bed.

I bend over the bed and whisper her name in her ear trying to wake her up in order to get out of there, but nothing happened. She lays still. Slowly I place one of my arms under her knees and my other under her shoulders and try to lift her. But as soon as I do, I drop her back on the bed.

I move my hand slowly to my stomach and that's when I remember that I had been shot with something. There a lot of blood coming out of my stomach. I look to my left when I hear a loud noise coming from the kitchen.

What is the man doing? Are you kidding me! There's no way in hell he's cooking. And if he is, those that mean he thinks he has all the time in the world. Did he do something to Yuzuki?

When I'm sure It's save I turn to face Kagome. I move her legs so that they're dangling on the bed and sit in between them. I grab her arms and wrap them around my neck. I make sure that the blanket is still covering Kagomes body before I get up and walk to the broken door and lock it.

I walk back to the window and sit on the edge. Ignoring the pain coming from the pieces of glass, that sinks into my skin. I need to get out of here as soon as possible. I turn my body so that my legs are dangling outside the window before jumping into the falling snow.

As soon as I'm hit with the cold winter snow it hits me like a tons of bricks. I'm not wearing any shoes, and I'm not wearing a shirt. I touch Kagome's feet only to realize that she's not wearing any shoes either.

Our luck.

The first thing that pops into my head as I began running it's how long I will be able to keep Kagome safe? How long can my body last before collapsing, before the life is frozen out of my body?


	29. Tears, Fear and Kiss

**Tears, Fear and Kiss**

_I don't own Inuyasha_

I walk through the forest as my feet melt the snow. And can't help but wonder how long Kagome walked before her feet began to ache, to bleed? I push that thought aside and make my legs run faster. I need to make sure she's safe.

I don't know how long I've been running when Kagome begins to stir in my arms. I ignore it and keep on walking. This is the first time I've been out of my mothers' house and to be honest I don't even know where I'm going. All I know is that I'm walking through a forest-like place.

"No!" when I hear Kagomes voice I don't even have time to react before she starts pushing herself away from me. I wrap my arms around her legs and hold her tight. "No…plea-"

"Kagome it's ok" I whisper trying to calm her down but it only seem to make her worst as her screaming gets louder. With out thinking I remove one of my hands from her legs. I grab her waist from behind before pulling her around so she can see my face.

"It's ok, you're safe" she looks up to see my face and I smile at her trying to hide my pain coming from my stomach. I watch as one of her hand goes up to touch my cheek.

"I…I thought he had killed you" she said wrapping her arms around my neck. After a minute or so she lets go, and seems to finally realize that we're not at the house any more. "You can put me down" she says trying to get her body of mine.

"I can't put you down" I tell her as I began walking through the forest. "You're not wearing any shoes" she looks down and smiles.

"So? You're not wearing a shirt" she said as she hugged me. "I'm sorry you got hurt because of me"

Slowly I move her around until she's behind me again before I start walking again. The pain coming from my body is unbearable but just having her holding on to me is enough to give me the strength to keep on walking.

"Thank you Sesshoumaru" she said as she pressed her face against my neck. And just like that the snow stopped falling to be replaced with rain. "I'll keep you warm"

:::::

I run furious through the trees how dare that piece of shit take my girl away! How dare he! After I told him he didn't deserve her! After everything! How dare he!

All my plans have been ruin by that bastard! Kagome and I were supposed to have had a very romantic dinner together but that couldn't happen because of that fucker!

If my girl gets hurt because of him! Ill make sure to make his last minutes in this world, his worst minutes he has ever lived.

I chase after his foots steps! After his bloody footsteps! At that I laugh just the thought of his pain make my heart fill with joy. I run faster when I hear a twig snap. I know I'm close, and that make my legs move faster.

I stop when I see Kagomes back. His carrying her, I walk slowly and try to make as little noise as possible. I could catch my angel without any disturbance.

The shitty weather would only help keep the other man confused, the man who might try to keep me from my prize. But that didn't matter. I know I can take him down. After all what can an injured man do?

All silence and darkness, as I closed in on my prey. Savoring the moment I paused, preparing my senses for a well-deserved treat. I'm done trying to be nice! Tonight I will make her mine! And there's nothing he can do to stop me! After all his life will end soon.

I walk closer to her and before I know her scent filled my lungs and my chest, sending a shock through my whole being. When I hear her voice I stop and my blood goes cold.

"I'll keep you warm" With one movement, I wrapped an arm around her waist and another across her mouth, pulling her closer to me, until her ear rested next to my lips.

"No my darling, it is I who will keep you warm" I whisper. She held still from fear and shock. As I pulled her off his back. Once I knew she was one hundred percent off, one hundred percent mine, I kicked him down.

"Why would you try to run away?" I asked her as I sat her down in the melting snow. "Did he force you? Did he try to get you away from me?" I walk closer to Sesshoumaru. My body boiling in anger.

"I'll get rid of him, and our love will grow stronger! I'll get rid of him because I love you!" I tell Kagome who's looking at the snow. I don't even give him time to turn over before I stab his left shoulder.

"Now, now, my prize. You had your chance to escape, but you insisted on tormenting me by taking her away!" I say as I kick him down "But now I've caught you, and I'll do with you what I want." I say as I start getting my gun out of my back pocket.

"I'll let you join your mother, I'll reunite you two" I will make him suffer! I'll make sure that his body is unrecognizable when I'm done. Nobody will know who this person is! Not even his dead mother. I place the gun onto of his leg before I let the trigger go. Bam! I can help but to laugh at his screams of agony.

:::::

I look up when I hear the gun go off and see Sesshoumaru on the ground "No!" I screamed as I ran to save Sesshoumaru. I couldn't allow this man to kill him just to show me how much he loved me. Not again!

"Please stop!" I screamed as my tears poured down my face. fast I try to make my way over to Sesshoumaru but he stops me when he pulls me by my hair.

"But my dear" he said dropping me on the ground "if I kill him we'll be able to be together forever" he said walking towards Sesshoumaru with a gun on his hand. "Don't you want us to be happy? Like we where before you ran away?" he said as he turned around and walked towards me.

"Yes" I said putting my hand up to his chest. "Please lets just go home, I'll be the perfect wife. But lets go home now" I said looking down at Sesshoumaru who was getting up.

"But we have to get rid of him" he said turning around "we don't want him going to the police do we?" with my hands, I get a grasp of his face and make him look at me. I close my eyes and move his face closer to mine until our lips meet. Fifteen seconds, the kiss I gave him lasted fifteen second.

"Please lets go home, no one will believe him" I tell him as I hold his hand and pull him away from Sesshoumaru. "He's an alcoholic, his own mother doesn't believe him, look at him how pathetic can you be" anything to keep him safe! Even if I have to hurt Sesshoumaru.

Anything

"Lets start…the family you always wanted" anything for the man… I love. I love Sesshoumaru. I would willingly give my life for that man, the only person I truly care about. Anything for him, for Sesshoumaru. After all not every story has a happy ending…


	30. Sweet Goodbye

Sweet Goodbye

I don't own Inuyasha

"Let's start…the family you always wanted" anything for the man… I love. I do love Sesshoumaru. I would willingly give my life for that man, the only person I truly care about. Anything for him, anything for Sesshoumaru. After all not every story has a happy ending…

"No!" Naraku turns around and sees Sesshoumaru walking towards us. "Please don't take her" Sesshoumaru said through bloody lips. "Don't!" he said as his legs gave on him and fell to the ground.

I pull Naraku harder. Keep Sesshoumaru safe! Is the only thing that my brain is saying. My legs move on their own. Away from Sesshoumaru. If we're not here, he'll be safe!

Naraku turns to see me before walking with me. I smile up at him knowing that I save the life of the one I love the most. We keep on walking but stop when we hear Sesshoumaru speak to us again.

"Please at least let me say goodbye, she's everything I have. And I'll never see her again" Sesshoumaru screams from the ground. _Shut up! Why can't you just let me save your life! Please stay down. _Naraku looks at me and gets his gun from his pocket. He holds my face and kisses my forehead. Before telling me to say goodbye.

"No, lets just go" I tell him but he won't hear of it. He says he knows me to well, and that he can tell I want to say goodbye. I walk slowly through the darkness. Until, I'm a foot away from him.

"Goodbye" I tell him and turn around. Just as I'm about to walk away his words stop me.

"Could I get a goodbye hug?" he asked, but not me. He asked Naraku. I turned to face Naraku. I shake my head 'no' and start to walk away. Before I'm stopped, by Narakus' voice.

"Give the man a goodbye hug, ya'll never see him again, do him that favor" J_ust__ a minute ago you wanted him dead! Now you want me to gi__ve__ him a favor!_ I turn and get on my knees to give him his hug. He's body covers mine blocking the rain and snow drops that fall from the heavens...

"Kagome, I rather die than be apart from you" Sesshoumaru said as he held me tight "I've already know the pain of not having you with me, and I can't live like that again" he said touching my cheek. I can't speak my throat hurts.

"Let's go dear!" Naraku screamed.

"I love you Kagome" his lips touched mine before I could pull away. The heat from his body traveled into mine. Lips so warm, so soft. I could feel every drop of love being passed to me, through his lips. I could feel all his emotions his fears and joys, and anger. In his kiss, and just like that my tears fell as we pull apart.

He cries with me. This was our sweet goodbye.

::::

"No!" I scream as I run towards Kagome. I allowed that bastard to be in this world because she had asked for it. But to do that to the woman I love… in front of me! After I had allowed him to live it's too much!

I grab Kagomes arm and pull her away from him. When she looked up, her eyes red and swollen, rain mixing with the tears on her face. I couldn't stand it. I pushed her away. She falls on to the red snow. ''I've reached my limit. I'm going to explode. I, who had been so calm, am ready to explode.

"You Bastard! I was going to give you a second chance at life! But you had to fuck it up!" I say as I place my gun right on his heart! I turn to face Kagome before letting go of the trigger. I watch Kagome as he falls backwards.

:::::

"No!" not knowing what else to do I move my hands back and forth on the snow. I try to find anything that can help me, anything that will take away the pain I hold in my chest. Naraku starts walking towards me.

Everything seems to be moving in slow motion, but finally I find what I've seemed to be looking for. A sharp object, with a wooden handle. I get up and start running. My bare feet sliding on the snow, with each step. But I don't stop I keep on running.

I can't hear anything but I know his behind me! I know that if I stop he'll catch me and take me with him! Where is Yuzuki! Where's everyone! I need some help. Sesshoumaru needs some help!

Help!

Me!

Anyone!

I run until I can't run no more. I can see lights, from where I'm sitting but I know I can't move any more. Yet, deep down, I don't want to move. I want to die I want to follow after Sesshoumaru, I want everything to end.

I've always wanted an unforgettable love. I remember watching sad moviesand thinking that I wanted a love like that. Something so pure and beautiful. But I never like the endings. I guess the ending is what I get, because I lost the one I wanted. And now I'm alone.

I'm one hundred percent alone. He said he killed my parents. He said he killed them so we could be together. I barely remember anything… I have no past, my present sucks and my future will never come. I know I didn't remember much about Sesshoumaru but deep down I know I loved him

That's when I remember that I'm holding on to something. I'm holding on to the thing that will save and end my life at the same time. I'll be free from everything and everyone. I'll be able to finally make a decision about the way my life is heading, because this is my choice. Not my parents, not Naraku, not any ones, but mine!

I see lights through the forest with each step the lights seem to be coming closer but I ignore it. I know that if I run a little bit more I could be saved by the light but I don't want to be saved. I need to get this over with as soon as possible. The sooner I do it, the better.

I haven't done this in a while, and yet it feels so familiar and so right, so routine, as if I done it yesterday. I take the knife and close my eyes and focus on the pain and sadness, something that I've had stored in my body for many months.

I open my eyes, take the knife, and press down. As hard as I can possibly press it._ "Why do you cut yourself?" _Sesshoumaru? I look to my left and right trying to find him. No! He's dead! I tell myself and push the knife down.

I feel my blood spilling but it doesn't stop me. I take the knife from my right arm and press it to my left, this time harder. I feel when the knife breaks through my arm. I'm sure this is going to be the most beautiful baby of pain I've ever created. In one way, out the other, twins I guess you could say. I feel weak but don't stop.

"_Do you want to die?"_ _shut up! Please just let me join you! I do want to die!_

I slowly take my shirt off. If I can lower my body temperature I'll die faster. I smile. Soon it'll be all over. I look up and see that the lights are still coming towards me.

With the last of my strength I place the tip of the knife on my neck. I feel the knife breaking through, but my strength is gone. I can barely push the knife in. I take my last breath and push the knife. Fast and hard. Until I hear a snapping sound. I can't breathe any more. I can feel the blood running down my throat. Filling my lungs, with blood.

"_I love you"_

No! I don't want that to be my last memory! I want to die happy. I don't want to think about Naraku! I want to think about Sesshoumaru. About... Kouga?

"Kagome! Wait up I'm coming" I look up and see a boy with blue eyes, and short black hair... he's running towards me but seems to be floating. The snow is gone and the sun's out.

The first thing that pops into my head is that he can save us! He can call the cops and get us out of here!

I look around it summer. It's a sunny summer's day. I know this boy yet I can put my finger on it. He runs towards me in slow motion. Every single hair on his head stays in plays as he runs. Who is he?

I'm sitting it the middle of the road. Cutting my arm. Everything's beautiful except for where I'm sitting. I feel like a cartoon. For some unknown reason there seem to be a rain cloud above my head. But instead of rain, blood is pouring.

"Don't do it" he says looking at the knife as it cuts my skin. I place the knife on my lap. I reach up but touch nothing. "I love you…." my eyes get full of tears.

"Kouga?" I say as my tear began to pour down my face. I'm so happy. Full of joy! I'm back to where everything started. Everything was a dream I look around the blood is gone. I look at my wrist not a single scar, all my babies of pain are gone.

I look down only to find that I'm wearing my uniform. Everything back to normal. I feel my hand being grabbed and look down at it, and find a tan hand holding it.

"Are you ok, Kagome?" I look up to see Kouga smiling at me. I reach up and touch his face. My hands treble up to his dark hair. I look at his face, where a big smile awaits me. I stare at him before he pulls me into a kiss. He pulls away before stroking my cheek.

"Why are you sleeping outside? You can't be doing this, especially not on the side walk" he says helping me up.

"I'm…I'm sorry" I look at him "I must have dose off" I say as I walk back with him into the school.

_"Darling! Come out! We have to go home!"_ someone sings to me I look back still holding Kougas hand.

"No! It was a dream" I scream still holding Kougas hand.

"No it wasn't" Kouga said smiling at me. "See" he said holding my arm up to my face, Blood pouring down my arm and into Kougas hand. He lets go and walks away. He walks and stands in the middle of the road. He smiles and waits for the car to get near him. I run towards him but everything starts going in slow motion. I see Ayame driving the red car. She screams "It's supposed to be you" she smiles, before running him over.

I open my eyes and see the snow. The red, cold, snow. The knife waits on my lap. I need to finish this! No more distractions! I push the knife down. I need to make it go through my neck. I need to die….

Now


	31. 730

**:::Seven hundred and thirty:::**

_**I don't own Inuyasha**_

"Darling, Come out! We have to go home!" I look back still holding Kougas hand.

"No! It was a dream" I scream still holding Kougas hand.

"NO it wasn't" Kouga said smiling at me. "See" he said holding my arm up to my face, Blood pouring down my arm and into Kougas hand.

He lets go and walks away. I open my eyes and see the snow. The red, cold, snow.

The knife waits on my lap. I need to finish this! No more distractions! I push the knife down. I need to make it go through my neck. I need to die….

Now

Crimson Butterfllies

On my cheek.

Floping their wings

As my tears spill.

Alone in the snow

That's fills with darkness

Shines so bright

Beautiful Butterflies

Crimson butterflies

On my wrist

Flopping their wings

as my blood spills

in a puddle of blood

drink it all

beautyfull butterflies

on my soul

Crimson Butterfly

On my neck

You where a warning

My soul you'd keep

Flop your wings

my butterflies

For soon in hell-

Silence, the forest is filled with darkness and silence. Yet here I am, alone unable to push the knife through. I don't have any strength left. But I believe deep in my heart that I've done enough damage to myself, so it's just a couple of seconds before I leave this world.

I see a light and open my eyes. That's when I notice that it's not so dark anymore. The light that seemed so far away it's just but a few feet away from me now. I can see the shape of a person behind the light.

'You're too late' I want to say with a smile but I can't even do that. So I just stay where I am, listening to my slowing heart beat. I close my eyes, and count.

"Wake up" I open my eyes but the light in front of me blinds me. Am I dead? I try to focus on the thing that's blocking some of the light.

"Kagome" I hear my name as it echoes through my head. _Sesshoumaru? Where are you? _"Please don't leave me" I try to focus my eyes as best I can. But it's impossible. I'm dying too fast. Ha! that doesn't even make sense but I can feel my life draining my body.

"Please I just found you! Don't leave me" I feel my self being moved back and forth. I close my eyes. I really don't care whose speaking I'll ignore him and die! I want to die! Now that I think about I've always wanted to die.

I can barely feel anything my body is frozen to the core. I can't focus. Everything is a blur or doubles... I close my eyes to try to focus, but when I do I can't reopen them.

"Open your eyes!" I feel my self being shaken hard. With each shake my back hits the tree I'm sitting against. Well this is sure my lucky day, someone is helping me now. I'm glad I don't feel anything, because i'm sure this would hurt.

"Get away from her!" I hear some screaming. I'm thrown on the snow before the volume on the world start going down. Bam! Bam! I ignore the sounds. I block every noise out, every single sound except for my heartbeat. I wait for it to stop. When it stops I'm relived. Peace at last.

::::730::::

At first it seems like any other day. He wakes up and groggily walks out of bed and into the bathroom. Brushes his teeth and walks into the shower. It's the cold water that really wakes him up, and He realizes that today is his seven hundred and thirty one cold showers since the incident.

"It's been two years" he says to himself. "Two years since she... Two years since she didn't wakeup." Seven hundred and thirty days since he died inside, because of her. Because she didn't wakeup. It really is her fault that he died inside. After all, she is the one who gave up on life. She was the reason he wasn't even sure he'd make it through another year.

He sits on the bed with just a towel on, and remembers how he begged the paramedics who tried to revive her on the cold snow filled ground of the forest. He watched as they did all they could to bring her back, he watched in horror until they got to the hospital and took her away. He was the last to know of her condition, because they had him in intense care. He could have died if the bullet was a few millimeters to his right. Yet he was alive.

"It's my fault she... It's my entire fault. if I hadn't asked for a hug she still would be walking around-"

"What are you doing up this early, Sesshoumaru?" I turn to my left to find mother standing outside my door less door. No scars nothing to show that she had been in a car accident two years ago.

"Another year has come," I tell her getting up from my bed and walking over to my dresser "I'm going to go see her" I get my cloths and walk to my bathroom. Before my mothers words stop me.

"Are you taking Inuyasha with you?" she asked walking into my room getting ready to make my bed. He too love her.

"No I need some time alone, to think and stuff" I walk in, I'm about to close my door when I remember "plus he has speech and walking therapy today" I close the door and get ready.

If I hadn't asked for a hug, if I hadn't kissed her. I should have called the cops! I should have hid her. I should have been there for her- So many tears, he cried for her. Why hadn't he told her that he loved her? Why hadn't he ever told her when she was at the Housen? Why did he have to leave her, the time Ayame tried to kill her? Why!?

BEEP…BEEP…

I look up, the light's green. Go. Green means go. It's been two years. 730 days. Around 17,520 hours. And still, these thoughts are still on his mind. He misses her. He misses the only girl who needed him most.

BEEEEEEEP….

I step on the gas and continue on my journey. I take my time. It's not like she's going anywhere. It's not like she's going anywhere for a while.

Two years. 730 days, 17,520 hours. 1,051,200 minutes since her last words. Since her last smile, their last kiss. He puts the car on park and steps out to the falling snow.

"Kagome" he whispers as he walks to through the parking lot. "I'm sorry"


	32. you're Dead, Silly Girl

***You're Dead,Silly Girl***

I dont own Inuyasha

I step on the gas and continue on my journey. I take my time. It's not like she's going anywhere. It's not like she's going anywhere for a while.

Two years. 730 days, 17,520 hours. 1,051,200 minutes since her last words. Since her last smile, their last kiss. He puts the car on park and steps out to the falling snow.

"Kagome" he whispers as he walks through the parking lot. "I'm sorry" he slowly makes his way to the hospital doors.

I walk through the hallway. A hallway I've come to know, as the back of my hand. Everyone smiles at me, and wave. They know me. This people have become my family over the past two years.

I walk by the cafeteria, before I'm stopped by the same woman and her husband. "You're here again?" the woman asked as I walk in to join them for tea.

"Yes, Mrs. Inyo I'm here again" I tell her before shifting my attention to her husband. "Can you believe this woman" he just smiles at me.

"What's the occasion today, Sesshoumaru?" Ms. Inyo asked pointing at my flowers. I look down at them. And smile. "Oh! I see, they for you girl?" she asked with her accent.

"yup"

"why black?" she asked pointing to the color."It's a secret" I tell her getting up and walking out of the room. A secret I could never tell her. At least not now, she'd have to wait a few hours.

I walk into a dark room and close the door behind me. Wonderful, the room smells wonderful "good morning" I say looking at the bed. Before walking over to the window and opening the blinds. "Isn't it a beautiful day?" I say looking out, at the falling snow.

Everything is just like the day before. There's not a single corner without flowers. The place is spotless. Yet the room feels stuffy for some unknown reason today. She lays there not moving. With her eyes close. I reach down to touch her.

Still warm.

Her body lay on that sterile white room, where no one cares about the continuous sound of her heart beat as it filled the room. She's beautiful. . Her hair long and silky, Spills over the side of the bed like a waterfall of black silk. Skin so pale and lips so red. Just by looking at her you would think she wasn't real.

Beautiful

Yet, I want to hate her. I want to hate her so much that my stomach hurts. As soon as those thought pop in my head tears start spilling. I know I could never hate her and it only makes my anger grow. Why can't I let her go? Why must I keep her here with me like a living vegetable? Just to see her everyday.

"How many more tears do I have to cry before I can forget about you?" I say touching her cheek. "Why must you torture me?" everyday we start the same conversations. Like a broken record, playing over and over again. "Please! If you're going to die just do it!" I scream

But today's different. Today ill unplug her. Ill let her rest in peace and try to forget about her. I open the window and get closer to the bed. I slowly sit on the bed and remove my shoes and socks, before grabbing her in my arms.

I lie in a soft, warm bed next to her and wait for sleep to take me away. I watch Kagome, as I held her close to my chest, and I take her oxygen mask off. I tremble. I don't know if it's because I was afraid of loosing her, or because of the cold that covered the room. I tried to calm down by looking down at her face. I brought the flowers to celebrate our death, which might come in a few hours.

"Please open your eyes" I said as I closed mine. "Please, just come back to me. Why can't it be me who lies on this bed…"

The room goes silent as the snow flies into the room. All the doors are locked. With chairs stoked in front of them. Not a single person can get in. No one will interrupt their beautiful dream.

****

He walks through the foggy forest not sure of what he wants to find. Everything's dark until he stands under a bright blue light. A girl sits a few feet away from him. All dressed in white, her hair spilling on the floor where she sits. He looks to his left and sees flowers on the ground. He ignores the girl and walks towards the flowers.

"I will never forget you" there stood a younger version of himself. Crying over his first love. The only one he thought he could ever love. Tears filled the rim of his eyes, not wanting to let them roll he turn away from himself. Only to be face to face with her. His grey eyed beauty.

"Rin?"

"Hey Mr. Tashio!" she said touching his face. "Ha! You look like a porcupine" she said feeling his chin. "Naughty, Naughty!" she moved her finger from left to right an inch away from his face. "You can't go to work like that-"

"You're dead" he said taking a step back.

"So are you" she said laughing "well not 'dead-dead' just dead in here" she said pointing at his chest.

She tilted her head to the right. "You don't miss me anymore do you? But don't worry its okay. I want you to be happy" she says stretching her hand out "but how can you be when she doesn't wake up?" she said sitting down and hugging her knees "silly girl is to scared to open her eyes"

She smiles at him and runs away. "Well it'll be over in a few hours. So just dream, and soon the three of us can play together."

"Rin!" said a dark male voice. Rin and Sesshoumaru turn around and look at the man a few feet away from them "make it the four of us. After all Kagome is my wife-"

*****

"Sesshoumaru…hmm it's co-ld" I open my eyes when I hear my name being called. I don't remember where I am. So I just look at the black ceiling. Everything is dark I feel an arm holding me down and soon I feel some hair tickle my chin and neck. As if trying to get closer.

"It's really cold" my eyes snap open but I don't want to move I don't even what to speak I know this is a dream! And I don't want to wake from it. Yet there nothing I can't do. Her arms slide off my chest and her head is removed from underneath my chin.

The bed squeaks, and I hear a big thud. "Hmm, please Sesshoumaru wake up! I don't know where I am! What's this! Ah…oww" I ignore her. There nothing I can do. "Why don't you listen to me? …Why's is the window open!"

I hear sobbing coming from the floor. And that's when I can't help myself I move closer to the edge of the bed. And there she was. A pale angle, with long black hair. She turns when she feels my eyes on her back.

"I can't move my legs" I sit up when I see her jaw moving up and down. She's cold. I get up completely ignoring her. I'll just wait for this to be over. Even if it's just a dream I don't want her to Suffer. I walk over to the window and close the window. I walk across the room and turn the light on. And that's when I see the blood.

Two small puddles of blood lie under each of her wrist. On her lap lay the hospital needles that where inside her wrist once. I walk over to her and pick her up. Heavy she's heavier than before. I put her on the bed. And sit across from her. That's when I feel her cold hand, hard across my cheek.

"Look at me!" my eyes go wide at her action my cheek burning in pain. I feel my cheek and feel a wet substance, her blood on my cheek. I look above her head at a red flashing light. "I'm scared"

"Kagome?" I said touching her cheek "please tell me this is not a dream-"

KNOCK

"Is everyone ok? It's me, Sesshoumaru open the door! Is Ms. Higurashi ok?" I say nothing, neither does Kagome. "Knock it down" just like that the door is broken down. I look at the nurse only to find a surprised look on her face. "Oh! My god!!!! Get the doctor" she said looking at Kagome.

She steps closer to the bed where Kagome and I are sitting. "Sesshoumaru move" she said I get up from the bed and she sits down. She grabs Kagome's wrists. "It's ok don't worry sweetheart, everything will be ok" she said putting two cotton balls on her wrist. Kagome sits motionless.

I turn to my left to see the doctor walk in the room. Tall,.pale with dark black eyes. He walks until he's in front of Kagome "you may leave" he tells the nurse. I don't believe I've seen this doctor before. I don't think I like him.

"And you are?" he says turning to look at me. With hate in his eyes. Hate? What have I one to him?

"Sesshoumaru Tashio"

"Well Sesshoumaru, I'm going to ask you to leave this room at once. I believe you've cause Kagome enough trouble" he turns to look at Kagome with out saying another word to me. "It's ok Kagome where does it hurt?"

"I don't hurt but I can't move my legs what wrong?" she asked the doctor.

"Nothing's wrong it's just that you've been in a comma for two years, **_darling_**"

Kagome goes still she seems to be frozen by that sentence. Her breathing speeds up, and her hands start to shake. We don't take our eyes of her. Her wrist tremble up to her face and than lets them fall. Her left arm goes up to her neck, up to her scar.

"_**Darling**_?" the doctor says getting close to Kagome, close enough to touch her cheek. She stops shaking and her eyes go wide with shock. Before she speaks again.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry! I'll go with you, don't kill him…I'm sorry!" I look at her she's scared, she's crying. The doctor gets closer to her and grabs her by the chin. "Please don't kill him! I'll be the perfect wife. We'll have the family you always wanted"

"_**Darling**_, is ok" the doctor says trying to put his arms around her.

"No! Is not! Don't kill him! Please" I push the doctor away from her, and hold her in my arms. She's shaking hard, she's frighten. He has frightened her.

"It's ok Kagome, Naraku is dead" I whisper into her ear. I turn to face the doctor and that's when I know why I don't like him. He looks like him, he looks like the monster who did this to her. The monster that has caused her all this pain. "It's ok it's over now, He's dead" I tell her looking straight into the doctors eyes.

"Please get out of the room and let my patient go" he said looking at me with pure disgust.

"Nurse!" I scream when the doctor pulls on my arm. He wants me to let her go but I will not! Under any circumstances let her go again. "Nurse!!"

"Mr. Tashio, I am telling you to get out of here now! Don't make me call security" he said pulling on my arm hard. Kagome holds on to me as if her life depended on it.

"I… thought it was all a dream!" she said through her sobbing. The doctor stops pulling on me to hear what she has to say "but it wasn't… I'm sorry I couldn't… protect you-"she stops and breathes "I'm sorry… you had to get hurt because of me"

"No! I'm sorry! You where my responsibility! It was my entire fault that you got injured! I shouldn't have asked for a hug! I shouldn't have kissed you…" she removes her head from my chest to look up at me. She smiles.

"Sesshoumaru, don't leave me…okay?" she said as her head tilted back and forth "I'm so tired-" she lays her head on my chest, I can feel her smile through my shirt "remember… when you told me… you loved me…" she doesn't move.

"Kagome?" I said trying to look at her but her face is hidden from my view. "Kagome wake up!" I scream shaking her "don't leave me!"

"Stop it" the doctor said walking closer to me. "She is just sleeping" he gets closer with each word. "I need you to give her to me, and leave" he said stretching his arms for her.

"No!" I said holding her close to my body and getting up. "We are leaving this place" I tell him getting up from the bed and walking closer to the door. There's something about him that tells me not to trust him.

"You can't take her" he said pushing me against the door frame "you see, she's mine" he smiles and walks closer to us. "She was a gift"

"What are you talking about?" I ask getting out of the room with her in my arms. "Nurse!"

"She's my only patient, she's mine! So give her!" again he stretches his arms out. Grabbing her dangling arm, and began pulling on her "Give her"

"Stop! Stop it- "

"Doctor!" the nurse scream from down the hallway "what are you doing!" The nurse said grabbing the doctor's hand and pulling it off Kagomes arm "let her go! What do you think you're doing?"

I just stand next to them as the nurse screams at the doctor. "You can't lay your hands on the patients if they're refusing treatment!?" she said looking at me with a questioning look.

I nod. I do refuse treatment from that doctor, he seems crazy! Plus he looks too much like that bastard, Naraku.

"But I was the one who found her! Her guardian gave her to me!" he said trying to get a hold of her again. "I've been taking care of her! For two years! You hear me! Two years! she's mine!!"

"Doctor control you! Onigumo! What's wrong with you!" there where people surrounding us. Two other doctors stood by Dr. Onigumo and held him back. "give her!"

I walk up to him and with out thinkinh twice about it I punch him in the face. all my anger towards Naraku released in just one punch to him! Onigumo his look-a-like. "if you come near her, if you even dare look at her I wont think twice ill kill you!"

He opens his eye wide in shock and shakes himself out of the doctors arms "im sorry, im sorry it was a mistake" he said bowing down to me with fear in his eyes "sorry!"

I turn around and start walking through the path the patients and doctors made down the hallway clearing my way. I look to my right and see Mrs. Inyo and her husband. "I guess she's the one?" she said and I nod. "she' sure is pretty"

"Take good care of yourself" she screamed as we walk out of the hospital.

I walk through the parking lot as the snow fall on us and its just like that night two years ago I hold her in my arms as the snow fall down from the heavens. My bare feet melting the snow with each step.

* * *

One more chapter to go!


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